Question on Materialism (Porn) and Happiness.

[assx95]

This is a very specific and intimate aspect of my life : 

I have a porn collection which is sexually irresistible to me. You could say it's a fetish. Now, i am addicted to jerking off to it. I understand two things in context of jerking off to it: 

1. There is no reason not to do it. 
2. Any reason I tell myself, to do it, is bullshit. 

What am I after? If i have the urge to jerk off, then I am after sexual pleasure associated with that very porn. When i am in the process of jerking off, it does feel like the sexual pleasure will fulfill me, but it's like a roller coaster, it builds up to the climax, and it swiftly comes down, which leaves me wanting more. And which makes me start another round for one for more hit leaving me exhausted and unfulfilled. 

I refuse to let go of that collection, and am hoarding it. Also I tend to think in terms of benefits and excitement - Like if i let go of the collection, will i be more fulfilled? The word "more" carries with it, the same vibe as I had before, even though I fool myself to think I'll be wiser to let go of it.

My question to y'all is: 

How do I make a long term strategic shift towards being rather than doing without reasoning through it? if i use reason, It backfires, for every reason for me, is ultimately groundless. 

 

[Rasheed]

13 minutes ago, assx95 said:

This is a very specific and intimate aspect of my life : 

I have a porn collection which is sexually irresistible to me. You could say it's a fetish. Now, i am addicted to jerking off to it. I understand two things in context of jerking off to it: 

1. There is no reason not to do it. 
2. Any reason I tell myself, to do it, is bullshit. 

What am I after? If i have the urge to jerk off, then I am after sexual pleasure associated with that very porn. When i am in the process of jerking off, it does feel like the sexual pleasure will fulfill me, but it's like a roller coaster, it builds up to the climax, and it swiftly comes down, which leaves me wanting more. And which makes me start another round for one for more hit leaving me exhausted and unfulfilled. 

I refuse to let go of that collection, and am hoarding it. Also I tend to think in terms of benefits and excitement - Like if i let go of the collection, will i be more fulfilled? The word "more" carries with it, the same vibe as I had before, even though I fool myself to think I'll be wiser to let go of it.

My question to y'all is: 

How do I make a long term strategic shift towards being rather than doing without reasoning through it? if i use reason, It backfires, for every reason for me, is ultimately groundless. 

 

1. For me, best way to be, is to do what you are passionate about. Aaron Doughty talks about this a lot. This will get you more in a being because you will lose yourself in the flow of doing what you love.
2. I know this is not what you asked but to be honest, porn is straight up: No; No; No for me. In my opinion, it will destroy individual inside out. That sexual energy is extremely powerful and helpful. It's really sad for an individual to waste it, for porn. Just imagine how much better you can do, If you stop jerking off and instead take that energy, and bring it up, toward creation. In my opinion, to stop jerking off, you need to develop a juicy vision, which is about transmuting that sexual energy into your creation and passion.

[assx95]

@Rasheed Hey! Thanks. I have find to something I'm passionate about. And have a vision. 

[Rasheed]

19 minutes ago, assx95 said:

@Rasheed Hey! Thanks. I have find to something I'm passionate about. And have a vision. 

That's amazing. Do you have a vision for quitting porn? 

Maybe you don't realize how this bad habit can actually destroy your vision and passion. 

Watch Leo's video about dropping a bad habit. Do the exercise. I think, it will really help you. 

Also, focus on the process. Fall in love with the process and that will shift you from doing and having, into being.

 

Edited November 28, 2019 by Rasheed

[Rasheed]

Also, two things I want to add

1. Anytime you have urge to jerk off, start taking deep breaths (4-7-8 breathing is good. Breath in for 4. Hold for 7. Exhale for 8). While taking the deep breath, focus on bringing the energy from down (from your dick, to say it harshly) to up, to your head. This will boost your creativity and probably 10x your work.

  If you are new to this, this may sound dumb but try it. Try it persistently. If you fail couple times, that's part of the process. Eventually, you will master it and this will transform your life.

• Also, anytime you have the urge to watch porn, use The Sedona Method to let it go. Watch Leo's video about Understanding Resistance to learn about this. Personally, when I had an urge to watch porn, I used Sedona Method, and it worked like magic for me. Highly recommend it. 
• Also remember, just because you could not let go couple times, is not a reason to give up on yourself. Keep your head up!

[krazzer]

I just deleted my porn collection yesterday. I was building it up since august or so.

I have been trying to quit porn for years. This year, I had some realizations about death, the point of life (that there is none) the universe and being god. My ego used this: "Whatever you do in this life doesn't matter, nothing is real, so you might as well enjoy some porn".

I stuck with this for a while. But recently, I had a different thought process. This life, it doesn't matter what you do. The whole universe ends when this story of my life ends. But does that mean you should perform destructive behavior? I'm stuck living this life (unless I kill myself o.c.) so I might as well try to enjoy it as much as possible. And that doesn't mean drowning myself in pleasurable activities.

I know how that works. The pleasure diminishes and all-round happiness diminishes as well. Everything else in life becomes a chore.

And knowing that I am god (as are you), I simply make a choice.

And I have chosen. No more porn, no more games. Those are my 2 biggest addictions. I can't do them in moderation. Drinking alcohol or eating junk food, I don't have any problem with those. They never leave me wanting more. But games and porn do. Let's just stop that shit.

I know what will happen. I've walked this path before. It's a path of peace and happiness. I failed in the past because I felt so good my ego said "You might as well play some games" which slowly but surely escalated to porn.

This might happen again, and I'm in peace with that thought, but I know it's always a choice.

So I would encourage you to delete it all. But you really need to feel strongly motivated to quit forever.

Edited November 28, 2019 by krazzer

[assx95]

16 minutes ago, Rasheed said:

Do you have a vision for quitting porn? 

I'm trying to think of it from a big picture perspective.Working on it. 

[Lento]

Run! Literally run!

Go on a daily free run every morning. Exhaust yourself. Go back home. Drink some juices. Take a shower. Have an above-average-sized healthy breakfast. And then do whatever you do.

Now, whenever you feel the need to jerk off, you will be able to detach much easier.

[assx95]

4 minutes ago, krazzer said:

So I would encourage you to delete it all. But you really need to feel strongly motivated to quit forever.

I deleted it multiple times and then built it from scratch. Yeah, i am working on the motivation part. 

[Rasheed]

1 minute ago, assx95 said:

I deleted it multiple times and then built it from scratch. Yeah, i am working on the motivation part. 

Develop a juicy vision. Everytime you backslide, don't give up on yourself, come back stronger.

[Rasheed]

9 minutes ago, krazzer said:

I just deleted my porn collection yesterday. I was building it up since august or so.

I have been trying to quit porn for years. This year, I had some realizations about death, the point of life (that there is none) the universe and being god. My ego used this: "Whatever you do in this life doesn't matter, nothing is real, so you might as well enjoy some porn".

I stuck with this for a while. But recently, I had a different thought process. This life, it doesn't matter what you do. The whole universe ends when this story of my life ends. But does that mean you should perform destructive behavior? I'm stuck living this life (unless I kill myself o.c.) so I might as well try to enjoy it as much as possible. And that doesn't mean drowning myself in pleasurable activities.

I know how that works. The pleasure diminishes and all-round happiness diminishes as well. Everything else in life becomes a chore.

And knowing that I am god (as are you), I simply make a choice.

And I have chosen. No more porn, no more games. Those are my 2 biggest addictions. I can't do them in moderation. Drinking alcohol or eating junk food, I don't have any problem with those. They never leave me wanting more. But games and porn do. Let's just stop that shit.

I know what will happen. I've walked this path before. It's a path of peace and happiness. I failed in the past because I felt so good my ego said "You might as well play some games" which slowly but surely escalated to porn.

This might happen again, and I'm in peace with that thought, but I know it's always a choice.

So I would encourage you to delete it all. But you really need to feel strongly motivated to quit forever.

Very inspiring. 

Video games are super destructive. For me, they are supremely connected to porn. Video games in my opinions leads to pornography and vice versa. It's all a business, who's goal is to addict you. 

4 minutes ago, Lento said:

Run! Literally run!

Go on a daily free run every morning. Exhaust yourself. Go back home. Drink some juices. Take a shower. Have an above-average-sized healthy breakfast. And then do whatever you do.

Now, whenever you feel the need to jerk off, you will be able to detach much easier.

This is a good start but it's really about making a real growth. In this situation, real growth would be to really do the inner work and solve it that way but running can be very powerful, I agree with you.

Running will be helpful after doing the inner work. Once @assx95 does the inner work, replacing porn with running will be perfect.

[krazzer]

8 minutes ago, assx95 said:

I deleted it multiple times and then built it from scratch.

Same here. What I noticed: The bigger it gets, the harder to remove, but stronger the motivation to stop when done so.

[hamedsf]

just observe everything in the long-term. it's right that I may sleep better after the fulfillment of jerking off to porn, but is it good for me in the long run? of course, not. you have certain fantasies and every girl has certain and special fantasies. remember by not jerking off to those bubble collection. you'll get the urge to learn the ropes to perform in the world, create your own porn scenes with your own girls if you are willful enough!