I don’t trust anyone

[Max_V]

I have a lot of trouble making friends and allowing myself to meet people. 
 

It feels like everyone in the world is out to get me and stab me in the back as soon as I trust them. I don’t know how to feel more safe and trusting in the world. Right now this feels like the safest thing to do to escape hurt. Yet, as a result, I have pretty much no friends and no dating experience. 
 

There is an inherent sadness that comes up when I look someone in the eye. Beforehand I have already decided that I will try to kill any sort of connective opportunity.

This whole dynamic of wanting to keep myself safe and as a result being isolated makes me want to stop existing. 
 

I don’t know what to do anymore.

[28 cm unbuffed]

yeah, i feel ya mate

right now i'm in a place when i have broken heart and slowly i'm coming to a point of "not feeeling anything anymore" 

not like - i'm so alpha, that i'm not going to feel anything, fuck them, more like - i felt so much hurt in my life that nothing can hurt me anymore, i'm a fucking robot at that point

to be honest - i have no idea how to help you here - i'm pretty much stuck in the same place as you

looking for someone to get hurt again? fuck that

looking for some meaningless relationships based on fucking / drinking / smoking weed? fuck that

staying alone till the end of my life? fuck that, but that's the best answer i can come up with right now

keep yourself busy with doing something meaningful with your life, trying not to think about this shit? - hmm... i think that's the best answer right now too

we all know that the best answer is always: "focus on yourself and the right person will come when it's time", but it's not that easy in real life, sometimes you have to hit rock bottom and get hurt like a motherfucker to understand that

you come to a point of : fuck that bitch, fuck everyone, i'm going my own way (not - "i'm going to show them!" way, more like-  i'm done with this shit, i really gotta focus on myself and really fuck everyone else)

 

if anyone else got any tips / opinions about this topic i will be glad to listen, i'm really fucking drowning here and my man Max is drowning too i think

Edited November 27, 2019 by 28 cm unbuffed

[hamedsf]

that's your own mind problem, everyone of us are always trying out different lenses in our life and unfortunately your mind is programmed with that viewpoint and It's not a normal thing because every relationship whether it's with your friends, colleagues whether it's intimate relationship requires "trust" at first place. 

that could be problematic much more in intimate relationship, for example, if I turn to my girlfriend and ask her: do you trust me? and she'd beat around the bush in order to not to deliver the right answer, I'd get colder. that's the bitter fact!

so if you want to take a step to change your viewpoint and take the healthiest one, I'd recommend you to push yourself further and further to be social to make the prior belief weaker and weaker. beware that your mind will try to maintain the status quo by collecting the related evidences.

[TRUTHWITHCAPITALT]

I had the same problem.

It is mostly your self talk and inhibition that is holding you back. join meet up, go out talk to people, get rejected and look forward to be passionate about something.

Look for your egoic pattern. 

Never forget that you made up the story of yourself. understand society is pyramid scheme and has it's own rules of survival. 

Leverage the resources we have here to your best advantage.

 

[Lento]

But you seem to trust us ? How's that going for you? ? And how is it even possible?