Sun shines in my live and I'm afraid it will pass

[Cineva]

How can I not go back into darkness which seems to me as Something that always happens in my personal development? It seems to me like half of the year I'm going trough lots of personal evolution just to get back to the place that I started in the other half of the year and crash pretty hard into old destructive habbits.

I feel like a part of me is attached to not evolving and destroying myself and I really want to break free of that self...

[Sahil Pandit]

@Cineva you have to shed those layers of fear, insecurity, doubt, and self judgment.

They exist to comfort you, to keep you safe from harm, (and from growth)

You must be willing to kill that layer of yourself in order to evolve into a higher version of yourself. 

(It's always worth it, but it's not easy..) 

Good luck.

[Rigel]

By dropping the fear of going back into this darkness. By embracing the existence of this darkness. It's soooo counter-intuitive.

[JustThinkingAloud]

8 hours ago, Cineva said:

How can I not go back into darkness which seems to me as Something that always happens in my personal development?

You're talking yourself into it. Your mind loves to be right, if you keep telling yourself that you will go back into darkness then you will.