Brain visions

[Preety_India]

 

 

 

 

 

Keep a file for sequence notes 

 

 

Forgot to do this last time 

....... 

[Preety_India]

Always do a recap of the journal every 15 days... 

 

[Preety_India]

On 2/17/2020 at 2:27 PM, Preety_India said:

Don't forget to write activity codes 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On 2/13/2020 at 10:33 AM, Preety_India said:

I need to count 10  objects. A total of 20 objects

 

 

 

 

 

On 1/28/2020 at 5:01 PM, Preety_India said:

I'm having a fun time eating ice cream... God after a long time some peace I get to enjoy 

 

Coming to the name of the tarot card set 

 

 

It should be called  Gohan tarot 

Or giyonuss tarot set 

 

2cards plus 1 card for city

3rd card for the devil 

4th card for the adjective Gohan 

 

 

 

 

 

On 1/28/2020 at 5:09 PM, Preety_India said:

So now I have decks 

 

Star deck 

Power Deck 

God tarot deck 

Energy Deck 

Role deck 

Gohan deck 

 

 

On 1/28/2020 at 8:04 PM, Preety_India said:

So today is January 28. And I have a 10 day goal set in front of me. 

In the next 10 days, I have to lay out what all I need to get done. Today was frustrating because I couldn't get it done. 

But tomorrow no excuses. 

I have to write something like 

"goal for the day" and mention it on a flash card 

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

Love life 

Health 

Career 

Money and livelihood 

Spiritual awakening 

Personal growth 

Progress

Balance 

Birth and death 

If you go round and round on your current situation you already see clues for your future. 

 

Assistance, relaxation, therapy, relief, confidence, guidance, support, positivity, counseling, advice, analysis, suggestions 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Total decks

Star deck 

Power Deck 

God tarot deck 

Energy Deck 

Role deck 

Gohan deck 

Monster deck

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

7 hours ago, Preety_India said:

So the next concept I was going to talk about is romantic energy. The sexual energy that drives life. The most primal energy that we are always seeking in relationships. 

The energy that we always need. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

I'm going to create a new deck called the dark mystic tarot. 

 

This tarot deals with mysticism and spirituality. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 9, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

New Beginning 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

So I had a nightmare last night and I need to record them to have a better understanding of what happens in my mind when I'm asleep. 

So it goes like this... 

I am living in Calcutta in a flat. There are others also like a college dorm. 

And these two men are at my door suggesting that they need to do some repair but I don't let them in and I tell them that there's no need. Yet they tell me some reason and convince me. 

Once they are in my room, they begin to open the switchboard and start doing stuff with the wires. And one of them occasionally turns around to ask me questions regarding the brand, when I purchased. I probably purchased the wrong one. 

He proceeds to explain me what needs to be done although I tell him there is nothing that needs fixing. 

I'm a bit pissed off at this point. I want them to leave. 

So they just leave it all open and don't fix it and they just continue. 

They leave. 

I'm asking them "how can you leave it all messy. I didn't need any fixing. You broke the board. And now you're leaving. What's this about? You gotta fix what you did just now" 

And the one guy calmly responds "I'm sorry but we'll be back with some cables and the right set. We need to get them." 

And so they left 

I'm left worried. Because they cut the electricity. So now there's no electricity. I'm thinking how am I going to fix this. 

I call the main office where people handle rent payments and concerns of residents. 

They tell me that these are the same men sent over by the company for the complaint I registered many months ago. I don't believe that a bit. 

I think this is all nonsense.. 

Then I see one of the men working at my neighbors flat. And I'm thinking maybe they are always needed for new residents and they mistakenly entered my flat instead of hers. 

It's many hours that go by and there's no callback from anyone. 

 

So I walk out of the room for fresh air in the park region of the building. It's a huge campus. I am walking further away from my apartment now. 

There is this bunch of guys and some women sitting on there. 

I see a man and he asks me what's going on. I think that maybe he is one of those men working off duty so maybe telling him will solve the problem. He listens at first and then looks intently at me. 

He tells me that he is going to kill me. He makes a sexual gesture towards me and I tell him to piss off. 

So he gets up and starts walking towards me. At this point I'm a bit nervous and angry. I tell the other guy what this guy was telling me. He pretends like he is not listening. 

So I run away from that place. I see that guy following me with anger in his eyes. I'm too scared at this point. 

I finally make it back to the apartment where I see a random guy just behind me making his way upstairs. I turn around at him and I ask him to help me. I tell him this guy wants to kill me. He doesn't believe it. When I tell him to take a look at the person who has been following me to the apartment, he walks downstairs but that guy has disappeared. He is nowhere. 

This guy comes back and reassures me that everything will be alright. 

I'm still a bit nervous and I key in the lock on my door. I open it and then once it's the same old thing. Nothing is being done about this. I'm very frustrated. 

So I knock on my neighbors door. She lets me in. 

I tell her everything slowly but I can see that she is not interested in listening. She is busy sorting things and acting like she didn't hear me. 

I ask her if I can use the bathroom. She nods 

When I enter the bathroom, it's all a mess. Tissue rolls and bottles and what not strewn around. There's even all the dishes and discarded food and bags abd cigarettes and everything else dumped everywhere. I'm like yikes..... So I just come out of the bathroom feeling disgusted 

I tell her I'm leaving and she is apparently showing no concern, still busy in her work. 

I call up an older woman for company. And she comes. She has known me for sometime. 

I tell her everything. And she is being sympathetic and telling me to be careful about the man who threatened me. 

But after some time I look at her and her face has changed. She is starting to look creepy. Her face keeps changing. 

And she takes a huge something and hurls at me. 

I am just confused. I run to the door and out. I keep running down the hallway screaming. She is after me throwing big objects at me. And I'm telling her "Please don't do this. Please don't do this. Please don't do this." 

And I wake up sweating with  fear... 

That was one terrible nightmare. Never had something like this in years. 

 

 

 

Edited March 8, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

It's just very difficult sometimes. I have been having pain in my chest ever since the nightmare. 

Phew. Tough day for me. I wasn't feeling great. 

Got stuff to do. Hopefully this week is going to be good. 

I was really feeling helpless and down today. Like it suck to be alive. There was so much pain in different parts of my body and so it was difficult to cope. 

I make sure that I always write down whatever symptoms I have in this journal so I can always have a track as to when they happened and what they were. 

 

Edited March 8, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Feelings I identify with 

• Helplessness 
• Hopelessness
• Stuck/trapped 
• Miserable 
• Self pity 
• Depressed 
• Despair 
• Worries about my health 
• Pain while reflecting the past 
• Sensitivity to feelings 
• Crippled. 
• Challenged 

[Preety_India]

The white angel tarot is more about passivity and kindness and joy and calmness

The dark angel is more about fighting back as hard as you can. Breaking chains, death defying, daredevilry. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

Few things to focus on while working on my intuition. 

• Reading energy or Vibing or receiving energy perfectly. Like an absorbent sponge
• Visualization.. Visualize on the energy 
• Focus. Sharp focus 
• Symbolic representation in the form of symbol or word. Both represent the same thing. A word /symbol guides you. Word or symbols can be used interchangeably. 
• Guidance. Let the word guide you. 
• Everything is cause and effect. So everything is a Synchronic pattern in life. Learn how to detect these Synchronic patterns by connecting deeply to them. If you saw the number 04 and met 4 people there has to be a connection there. 
• Keep the mind vigilant to be able to detect words, thoughts, ideas, prayers, symbols, feelings and voices. 
• A word and a voice is an important aspect of spirituality 
• Train your mind to become an Empath. 

 

 

In short I'm doing all this in order to 

• Guide myself through a symbol (word/symbol/image///////message) 
• Message and word can be two different things. For example, if I say the word "memory" it can simply mean that I need to improve my memory. If I use the word "sword" it can mean a fight.. This is more like the meaning of the word or the message inherent in it rather than just using a simple word. So a word can also be used as a metaphor. Thus there can be direct words or there can be metaphors. Deciphering these words depends on how they interact with your life. 
• Deriving energy along with guidance. The energy of the word "game" is fun. Energy of the word "argument" is tension or conflict. Energy of the word "beach" is playful and calm. Energy of the word "family" represents bonding. Energy of the word "ice-cream" is happy energy. Feel that energy going through your body and your mind. 
• Visualization of this symbol and its energy and its process, and its fulfillment and its context, visualization of the event associated with the word or symbol. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 8, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

The white angel tarot is also going to be added to the dark mystic deck

 

 

[Preety_India]

These are so beautiful 

Diatoms 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

I'll use this for general reminders 

 

 

 

Use this for a bigger goal for the week or a few days or the current month 

 

 

 

Use this for the next thing on my mind for the current time

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Brae needs healing because it has to focus on it. 

 

Too much commotion

 

I wanted to recreate the Gohan deck I had made previously. 

 

 

Edited March 8, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

On 1/28/2020 at 3:59 AM, Preety_India said:

Created 3 fictional characters and a fictional city in the past 3 hours 

Fictional city name - Giyonuss

 

 

Two women, one representing softness and intelligence and the other representing bravery and strength 

The head of the city is Helena the brave 

The softer one is Vanessa 

The last one is a villainous character valjey or Davila originating from the devil. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On 1/28/2020 at 4:24 AM, Preety_India said:

Poison ivory can be another character 

I also have an adjective in mind for the fictional city Giyonuss. 

Gohan. 

Wow I never knew I could use the word like that. Like fabulous 

 A city which has perfect order and balance. 

 

On 1/28/2020 at 5:01 PM, Preety_India said:

I'm having a fun time eating ice cream... God after a long time some peace I get to enjoy 

 

Coming to the name of the tarot card set 

 

 

It should be called  Gohan tarot 

Or giyonuss tarot set 

 

2cards plus 1 card for city

3rd card for the devil 

4th card for the adjective Gohan 

 

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Unresolved trauma, self medication,excessive use, Dissociation, search for healing, fragmented self, escapism, lack of accountability, unable to confront shadow, no sunshine, professional help, lonewolf

 

Just looking for healing

 

Edited March 8, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Analysis 

Roast 

Sarcasm