Brain visions

[Preety_India]

A people pleaser will always suffer in life because of his self esteem issues. 

People pleasers need to upgrade their self esteem

 

 

[Preety_India]

Some things are looking up

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Listening to the fear factory 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Maybe things can get better finally. 

 

Tired feet

 

[Preety_India]

Sometimes I need to be in love with myself 

 

 

[Preety_India]

1 hour ago, BETGR164128 said:

Just start writing things down that you really want. No holds barred. Whatever comes up for you is personal. For me I started getting a glimpse of what I've been hiding from myself. Then I got a surge of energy like a rocket has been inserted into my ass! I have heard people use a lot of energy hiding aspects of themselves from themselves. Feeling good. 

 

This is shadow work on steroids! I'm not sure if nahm intended this, but it's very useful 

 

1 hour ago, BETGR164128 said:

If you try making a dream board the first thing you notice is all of the negative beliefs you still hold about why you don't think it's possible to have everything you want now. Very powerful stuff. I don't think I could have found another tool to expose what's unconscious in me as powerfully as the dream board. I highly recommend it as a spritual practice. 

 

If you think you're enlightened, go spend an afternoon creating a dream board 

 

[Preety_India]

Sometimes you try so hard to be strong, to be tough, to be brilliant, to be smart... 

And then one day.... You just give up.. Because you can't be strong anymore, because the more you try the harder everything gets. 

 

 

You just want to surrender in the moment and let the devil win because you just can't win no matter what. 

There's a state of helplessness and despair and disgust with oneself for not being able to be what the heart wanted. 

To fight for survival and learn that it's a losing battle no matter how hard you try. You keep beating time and then time keeps beating you at your game and you just have to give up..... 

That's hard 

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

 

Today is a better day.... 

 

 

[Preety_India]

There were a few concepts that I left out because I was in a hurry and I was going through too much since the last two weeks.. 

But I'll back to normal at some point within the next few weeks. And things gonna be alright or so I assume. 

 

So the next concept I was going to talk about is romantic energy. The sexual energy that drives life. The most primal energy that we are always seeking in relationships. 

The energy that we always need. 

 

 

 

Yoohoo this is gonna be big for me. 

My mind is not yet ready to explore this new concept that popped in my head this morning. I'm excited. 

I have been through so many romantic relationships. Of course there were beautiful moments and there were ugly spats. 

But the energy that I held as a teenager during my puberty is the most sexual primal energy a young woman feels when she is blossoming into a sexual woman. 

Sexual feelings weren't that important when I was just 12 years old.. It felt kinda awkward and repulsive in those days. Like I didn't want to talk about it. 

I retaliated sex when I was 15.... A friend of mine helped me understand that my feelings were normal and there was nothing to hide or repress. THAT WAS BIG. LIKE REALLY Big. The best advice to give to a teenager is to let them feel sexual when they feel it rather than telling them that it's something they shouldn't do 

 

I was careful not to tell my mom about it because as you know how mommies are, they just don't get it unless it's them.... 

My mom would have lashed out at the mere mention of sex and said something like......

"Don't be with boys.....Blah blah....Blah"...... 

I wish I had a mom who was more understanding of female nature and how things work for women. It's similar to having a dad who says don't date girls... 

SMH.. Men and women who become parents and who are totally to their children's feelings and desires and ambitions STINK and should be repulsed by society. 

There is nothing worse than putting your child on the wrong side of the bed and hoping they would wake up on the right side. 

 

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

So post the breakup I need that energy that has eluded me for so long. 

I believe in the law of attraction. So I believe that if I attract this energy I can also attract people similar to this energy. 

Right now Andrew is in my life. But like so many relationships that I had, I never know if this is going to last forever 

Sometimes the whole thing "this will last forever" seems fake like an illusion. 

Andrew is very protective of me. Which is good. 

In some ways Andrew represents the romantic energy that I always needed. But he is busy a lot on his hifi job.. So I only get to meet him sometimes and we talk little these days. 

The last time I met Andrew was on my birthday. We are still in the friend turned lovers zone. 

He is good looking and he is well behaved, nice gentleman. But I don't know how things work. So I don't keep high hopes. 

I still myself have a lot to do.. 

 

[Preety_India]

On 3/3/2020 at 7:58 PM, Preety_India said:

Today is March 3 and I got some very important work done today in the morning. 

 

Ahhhh... What a relief... Finally that tension is gone. Major pending work was completed today 

 

It was INS

 

Edited March 7, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

 

 

          OPS FEAR FACTORY 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Today is Saturday and my neighbor is jamming the music so loud. 

 

 

 

Ughhhhhhhhhh

 

[Preety_India]

Back to my sequence notes

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

From Monday on I need to go to the library. 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Start reviewing sequence notes

 

And keep timers

 

Edited March 7, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Do CLNP

 

 

[Preety_India]

Do tarot spreads

 

The decks I created this year 

Power tarot and star deck

Monster deck

Energy deck

Role deck 

 

 

[Preety_India]

On 2/25/2020 at 7:27 AM, Preety_India said:

 

 

Recap 

 

 

Pre planning

Pie chart 

Tracking system... Sequence of codes 

Reward points 

Reward charms 

Implementation Days 

No Social Contact Challenge 

Activity codes

reward charms jar

Charms chart 

Activity blocks 

Sequence notes 

Activity classifications as Engaging/Useful or Random

Milestone Photo album and Milestone Jar 

 

 

 

On 2/25/2020 at 7:30 AM, Preety_India said:

       

How to start implementation day all over again? 

Refer to the pre-planner. 3 page Reference chart 

Create sequence notes, activity codes and activity blocks. 

Start right away 

Keep the timer as a reminder for the reward system

Reward points to be given 

Reward charms chart to be drawn. 

The tracking system will be represented by a sequence of codes in line in the order in which they were finished after a couple bunch of codes are done. Like example... T1, A4. S7. S4. R4. B2... Etc 

Create a pie chart in the end for future reference and record keeping. 

             

 

               

 

On 2/25/2020 at 7:49 AM, Preety_India said:

Activities which are engaging 

• Meditation 
• Deep breathing 
• Exercises 
• Friendly conversations 
• Reading 
• Journaling. 
• Music
• Entertainment 
• Cooking 
• Diet 
• Sleep
• Health related 
• Yoga 
•  

 

On 2/26/2020 at 6:42 PM, Preety_India said:

 

 

Keep a file for sequence notes 

 

 

On 2/19/2020 at 3:30 PM, Preety_India said:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I made a rudimentary cardboard box paper sheet as a planner along with the pencil pocket drilled into the cardboard  box.. I couldn't find anything better.. 

I could use a notepad but won't work it doesn't have space to tie a pen or pencil to it. 

So this was a good DIY quick homemade planner pad. With the option to unhook and portable pocket or purse size. 

 

 

 

On 2/18/2020 at 11:48 AM, Preety_India said:

 

February 18

Today is Day  16 of no contact challenge

 

Day 2 of Implementation Days. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On 2/15/2020 at 6:08 PM, Preety_India said:

 

 

 

On 2/15/2020 at 6:11 PM, Preety_India said:

Activities will have codes like 

 

A1, A2, A3, A5, T1, T2, T4, etc.. I will have reference manual or spreadsheet for these activities.. Activities will be tasks that will be pre planned. 

 

 

 

 

On 2/3/2020 at 7:22 AM, Preety_India said:

 

No Social Contact Challenge. 

Day 1 

Month February 2020

February 3, 2020

Today I didn't log into my account. Resisted the temptation. Good job.