Nivsch

You'r vegan/activist in something, but your family doesnt feel like you

9 posts in this topic

What do you think the reason is?

I want to help people who got into an issue and are frustrated because their family and friends doesnt feel at all like them (even tough you talked and talked and explained them about meat industry...). Me myself is vegan and i felt (and sometimes feel, even tough in less intensity today than i felt in the past) that its get me angry that my family doesnt do any even tiny dietary change trying.

In my opinion the reason is: people are filtering out issues they dont want to really be exposed to, and therefore they have NOT really exposed to the animal suffering issue... because talking to them rationally its a very shallow level of explaining.

If they were exposed (lectures on youtube, films....) + let the emotional filter open - than, only than, they would really understand the issue.

So the solution is: they aren't heartless-careless people, they just have not yet really got the issue.

We just have a built-in filtering mechanism in order to defend ourselves from overwhelming.

Edited by Nivsch

🌻 Thinking independently about the spiral stages themselves is important for going through them in an organic, efficient way. If you stick to an external idea about how a stage should be you lose touch with its real self customized process trying to happen inside you.

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Your frustration shows that you may be doing this from the wrong reasons, you need to be someone who is helping/saving people and thus you also need them to need you. 

When you help someone from the position of the helper (and superior), this causes all sorts of devilry. 

Been there, done that.

I would focus on being the example first above all, let your life be your message, as Gandhi said. Secondly, of course, spread your message to whomever is interested in hearing it, the believers and the ones who are open to change, not the non-believers. Strive to be effective in spreading your truth, of course, but don't get too attached with the results and, certainly, do not try to convert everyone.

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8 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

Your frustration shows that you may be doing this from the wrong reasons, you need to be someone who is helping/saving people and thus you also need them to need you. 

When you help someone from the position of the helper (and superior), this causes all sorts of devilry. 

Been there, done that.

I would focus on being the example first above all, let your life be your message, as Gandhi said. Secondly, of course, spread your message to whomever is interested in hearing it, the believers and the ones who are open to change, not the non-believers. Strive to be effective in spreading your truth, of course, but don't get too attached with the results and, certainly, do not try to convert everyone.

I do videos which in them I share my experience and insights and i publish it on facebook and youtube


🌻 Thinking independently about the spiral stages themselves is important for going through them in an organic, efficient way. If you stick to an external idea about how a stage should be you lose touch with its real self customized process trying to happen inside you.

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You ever have Jehovah's Witnesses come to your door? They could be telling you the best advice you would ever hear, but the presentation and the intrusiveness is a huge put off to most. Kind of the same thing with food. If someone wants to hear about it I will tell them. I am trying to help my mom fix her diet. I am not telling her to go vegan even though I am. I'd rather give her neutral unbais meal recommendations to help promote her to thrive. Because she is looking for the help. I don't have a ton of faith it will work for her because she a root issue that is not solved. But I would like to at least give it a shot and it gives me something to do with her. Granted I am little bias towards fruits and veggies, but for good reason they are good for you. I even picked her up the 150 healthiest foods book for part of her christmas present and one for my sister too. Those have nothing to do with being vegan, but a good collection of good foods. Now if they ever want to try some vegan food or want some help I gladly will. I'd rather just see them make better choices for themselves if they are willing too. It all starts somewhere. 

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If your Family eats Standart American Diet (S.A.D.) they would greatly benefit from eating more fresh vegetarian food. If you do it good then time will prove you right... you will prosper as their health will go down.. But don't preach...

 

22 hours ago, Nivsch said:

So the solution is: they aren't heartless-careless people, they just have not yet really got the issue.

We just have a built-in filtering mechanism in order to defend ourselves from overwhelming.

Basicly true.

9 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

Your frustration shows that you may be doing this from the wrong reasons, you need to be someone who is helping/saving people and thus you also need them to need you. 

Also true. I'm a Vegetarian and was a Vegan for years. You push them in the wrong direction with this: Into Ego Defense.

 

37 minutes ago, Average Investor said:

You ever have Jehovah's Witnesses come to your door?

Bam. Nailed it in one sentence.

 

 

Edited by supremeyingyang

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@Nivsch  i guess you could say people are on a different level to openness towards special topics, especially if they have lived their whole life with it. if a person is a die hard meatarian, there is no chance in making that person convert, it`s like with a fanatic religion, you will take away what life is worth living for. so first of all checking if it is worth your time (maybe with family you will put in more effort, because you love them). in my experience people are more likely to think it over if you argument in a direction where they already want to improve - health, weight, animal love, cruelty, being informative to their own benefits, especially if someone has a health condition you will probably have some kind of chance to convince them over a period of time. introducing some vegan healthy food, is one possibility. cooking for them or with them. for your family it would be probably nice if you all could sit at the same table and enjoy the same food, that might be an argument, so doing it for you.

(but don`t be disappointed a meat addict will not give it up for you, has nothing to do with you, but with addiction. they won`t realize that and won`t believe that they are meat addicts as there is no reliable data about that...only their craving shows it. they might be really nice spiritual and social beings, but their stomach is a mass grave - who would want to realize that. it`s really hard to understand deeply, there will be multiple forms of trying to deny and finding argumentation why it`s different - one part is the invention of the lesser being. what is also scientiffically proven - lesser neurons)

Edited by remember
sorry the last part sounds so radical...in some sense it is not - but it sounds radical. most people don`t like shocking, shocking is a good argument to deny as well.

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Willful ignorance.  Those that are willfully ignorant will only become more polarized and resistant when you apply more "pressure".  Being an influencer for this type of ideology is very counterintuitive. 

From my point of view, the more action/dialogue/communication results in reduced efficacy of advocacy (and counter-productive) for the majority of the population.  It sounds like your personal experience is consistent with mine.  

Live your best life.  Be the example the world needs.  Respect others choices even if they disagree. Humility and humor go a long way to breaking down barriers and facilitating environments when people may be willing to hear another perspective.  

 

 

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35 minutes ago, exhale said:

Willful ignorance.  Those that are willfully ignorant will only become more polarized and resistant when you apply more "pressure".  Being an influencer for this type of ideology is very counterintuitive. 

From my point of view, the more action/dialogue/communication results in reduced efficacy of advocacy (and counter-productive) for the majority of the population.  It sounds like your personal experience is consistent with mine.  

Live your best life.  Be the example the world needs.  Respect others choices even if they disagree. Humility and humor go a long way to breaking down barriers and facilitating environments when people may be willing to hear another perspective.  

 

 

Yes but in this video i want not to turn my facebook friends vegan, but to help vegan people to deal with their dissonance and tough feelings about their family, because i suggest them a solution to the problem - explanation of why their family is ignorant, which will help them see their family and the whole issue in a systemic way (and not so emotionally).

Edited by Nivsch

🌻 Thinking independently about the spiral stages themselves is important for going through them in an organic, efficient way. If you stick to an external idea about how a stage should be you lose touch with its real self customized process trying to happen inside you.

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I think the idea is good—to provide a resource that helps vegan individuals cope with living in a family system that doesn’t agree with their opinions. 
 

My comments were more of a response to your comment about showing videos to open the emotional filter.  
 

Are you able to post a link to your videos or is that against Forum policy?

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