Girl with boyfriend: moral dilema?

[Dlavjr]

On 11/22/2019 at 5:57 PM, Keyhole said:

Same goes for you.  I see you blaming the person you slept with, but you're just as much of a sleaze for doing it, too.

I don't blame anybody honestly, we were kids at the time and I didn't know then what I know now. I was a horny 17 year old that saw an opportunity for sex that at the time I didn't know how to get, so I took it. It was a learning experience, and my reason for sharing my experience was an attempt to help somebody to not make the same mistake. I don't blame anybody for the outcome of my life besides myself, what I did was sleazy and I can honestly say that despite being grateful for it happening so I could open my eyes and improve myself, it's something that you should avoid if possible. 

[TrynaBeTurquoise]

6 hours ago, Alfonsoo said:

@Leo Gura yeah, you are probably right.

You got me thinking . After my some psychedelic trips I experienced a huge , ginormous ego backlash. I really am having trouble getting back on track, in all aspects: nutrition, meditation, etc. It feels almost as if I was starting from scratch. I think you can see it in this post thread.
could you make a video for people who are just starting (or at finding them self out of track) to help the chick start ? I know your way past that but you’ve got a lot of new viewers and all the new content and knowledge could be integrated in this video. I’ve seen it, I’ve recommend the channel to varios friends whom seem genuinely interested but got intimidated by the newer topics.

im so sorry if this looks to low conscious for your time, I know you would rather do ever more complex videos but I believe helping the new comers or the fallen ones (hehe) would really really be of help.

Watch his video on Ego Backlash

[Forestluv]

On 11/22/2019 at 9:28 PM, Alfonsoo said:

Why would you say that?

Ime, lack of trust is corrosive. If someone is untrustworthy, I won’t date them. It never turns out well ime.  

[Alfonsoo]

On 11/21/2019 at 4:13 PM, TrynaBeTurquoise said:

Personally, I think the "once a cheater, always a cheater" is a popular, mainstream assumption. Its probably most often the case but I dont think is an absolute. 

It depends on how deep your connection is with this girl. Its probably likely to be a more lustful, physical attraction. Try to imagine what it would be like breaking up their relationship, you getting with her, and staying with her for years after your initial physical attraction and sparks have died. Would you be in some sort of soul-bond with her? Like a 100% conviction she is the one for you. Its likely that would not be the case IMO. And as for the notion that if she is flirting with you, their relationship is probably not good anyway, maybe that is the case but then it would probably dissolve on its own eventually or by other means so don't take it as your responsibility to free her from the relationship. Also try to put yourself in the shoes of her boyfriend. 

Picking back up the subject. I’ve actually become kind of friends with her boyfriend and I’ve decided that unless some major situation allows for her to dump him and for me to move in it’s not worth it damaging her reputation(she may start getting called a slut or something like that) we are friends and I do care for her . So maybe I’ll just stick around as friends and be ready for when she is available. In a couple months her boyfriend is moving to study in a another state and her and I stay in the same town, so maybe then. Of course I won’t wait for ever but I think in this case it’s worth the small waiting. Only a couple months and I dint hurt her or myself. And I give time for them to get closure properly. She says they won’t last long being apart. I don’t know what you guys think

[PlayOnWords]

@Alfonsoo what is your sex life like currently, if you don't mind me asking?

I know what it's like to get fixated on one girl, with a boyfriend no less. 

If I were you, I'd be exploring my sexuality instead of waiting for one girl to maybe break up with her boyfriend.

Sounds like you're on the hook with no guarantee of being reeled in. 

Edited January 29, 2020 by PlayOnWords

[Kalki Avatar]

Try to find out why she still with her boyfriend. Must girls prefer being with someone they are not even much attratcted rather than being alone. Thats enough to find out if you can keep going. 

If you have lasted too long to even kiss her after building chemistry, forget about it. 

 

Edited January 29, 2020 by Kalki Avatar

[Meetjoeblack]

On 21/11/2019 at 1:28 AM, Alfonsoo said:

What you guys think of this/think I should do?

iv been with a girl, she has a long time boyfriend, but out friendship is exponentially growing into a potential romance. Our interactions at at the point I’m starting to feel some jealousy from the boyfriend. The girl and I we really have a thing. I can feel she tones everything down a few notches when her boyfriend pops around (physical contact etc). 
So I have to make a decision; wether

a) I proceed and most probably end up having something with her. Which I assume will destabilize her relationship but, a part of says that if her relationship was so great and fulfilling she wouldn’t be looking for something else

b) stay away, which rather not but I don’t want to mess with her emotions and have her getting hurt.

i

She's getting validation and proving stats correct on women having plan Bs (no pun) in a LTR. 

I do pickup. I am trp aware. There's nothing moral you'll get from me. 

I picked up a girl last summer at the beach. Pulled her out of a pool and led her back to my beach towel and I took her #. I later saw her out with her bf lololol.  ? monogamy! 

I didn't know. It still wouldn't deter me. Its not preferable. Some guys will throw down over their little cherish even though she's jumping off you. its Cra Cra! 

To each their own. There's a chance of a fight or violence unless bf has low testosterone levels. Pick your poison. Be prepared to handle consequences. 

There's no ambivalence with desire. Furthermore, you may hookup and she stays with her bf. There's a chance she's leaving him but if she cucked him,  you're likely next. 

[Alfonsoo]

@PlayOnWords not as active as it could be. How do you suggest I work on this?

[Alfonsoo]

On 1/28/2020 at 10:01 PM, Kalki Avatar said:

If you have lasted too long to even kiss her after building chemistry, forget about it. 

 

What do you mean?

[Meetjoeblack]

14 hours ago, Alfonsoo said:

What do you mean?

Girl's get turned off by cowardice. 1sec left in a game. You have the ball. What do you do?

I always shoot. I always approach. I always esculate. I never wonder what if after.

[PlayOnWords]

@Alfonsoo Tricky. I suggest studying female psychology and pick up. Read The Game by Neil Strauss. There's loads of PUA stuff on YouTube.

Fundamentally, learn how to approach and attract women. Don't be needy with them either. If you show any sign of needyness, it's game over, in my experience.

It can be a long process but it's a beautiful and wondrous journey if you are interested in psychology.

Any man is capable of improving with women, if you care enough and put the effort in. 

[Alfonsoo]

@Meetjoeblack well, that’s precisely the question. I m debating whether to do it or not. Remember she is in a long lasting relationship. If you met a girl but she is happily with a boyfriend (or at least that’s what it seems, you don’t really know) and you become friends of her, really good, intimate caring friends and you know it will theoretically work would yo do it and how?

. I can read the signs. If she was single I would move more intensively. But she has her boyfriend and seems quite loyal to him. Maybe she really loves him, or she doesn’t want to be labeled a slut by ditching him form me I don’t know.

[Meetjoeblack]

3 hours ago, Alfonsoo said:

@Meetjoeblack well, that’s precisely the question. I m debating whether to do it or not. Remember she is in a long lasting relationship. If you met a girl but she is happily with a boyfriend (or at least that’s what it seems, you don’t really know) and you become friends of her, really good, intimate caring friends and you know it will theoretically work would yo do it and how?

. I can read the signs. If she was single I would move more intensively. But she has her boyfriend and seems quite loyal to him. Maybe she really loves him, or she doesn’t want to be labeled a slut by ditching him form me I don’t know.

I could be in church, monastery, shopping center or wherever. A girl always stands out. I always approach. it's not always smooth or pretty. it's not like the coffee shop scene in MJB but no regrets.

I am on a lifeline from perma ban camp. You're killing me bud.i will be cryptic lulz.

I don't believe in monogamy though, I think it's better for kids and society.

I approached a girl at the beach last summer. I pulled her out of the water and 30feet to my towel. I took her number. I later ran into her with her bf. she was looking for Plan B. likely checking options.

Her ltr isn't a concern for me. It never took and I never cared to follow up. If she said I have a man,there's a beach full of hot young girls in bikinis. I wasn't losing sleep. it was sly because she never said anything.

I just tell girls to come over. I don't ask for ltr status. it's not my business. I am out for me. It's different if I saw a wedding ring and children. That's weird. I have my limits.

Funny story. My wing once texted me back asking "which is the wedding finger." ???

the presupposition is marriage matters to him. he was interested and wanting to check first. I died laughing. I knew what was up. sweet kid.

It's all projection and conjecture. You don't know till you get her to come over. the fallout is, you can't trust a cheat.

 

My play? Tell her to introduce you to her hit younger friends (or next set). I am not the water boy. not waiting for her ltr to fail and pick up the pieces. She's got friends. act as such.

[Meetjoeblack]

5 hours ago, PlayOnWords said:

@Alfonsoo Tricky. I suggest studying female psychology and pick up. Read The Game by Neil Strauss. There's loads of PUA stuff on YouTube.

Fundamentally, learn how to approach and attract women. Don't be needy with them either. If you show any sign of needyness, it's game over, in my experience.

It can be a long process but it's a beautiful and wondrous journey if you are interested in psychology.

Any man is capable of improving with women, if you care enough and put the effort in. 

Please. more of this. 

op, you did your part. let it die. drop it. Suggest she show you to her  hot young friends.

there's her being unavailable making you want her but, a far better play is pursuing her friends.

likely,  single and no fallout.

no stone in turned ftw!