Posted November 19, 2019 (edited) Why the good guy seems condemned to not found a girl which like him For what he is ? Is more a curse than a gift being a honest and good guy ? is all about sexual attraction for attracting a girl and to start a relationship ? And what’s wrong with a good guy who stand for himself ? Edited November 19, 2019 by Fede83 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 “You don’t have problems; you are the problem.” – Swami Chinmayananda Namaste ? ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 7 minutes ago, Anna1 said: Ohhh this is a masterpiece thank u Anna much blessing to u ❤️❤️❤️ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 @Fede83 ? Blessing to you too. Feel better! I'd bet most of the issue is a lack of confidence, more then the other stuff?. Good guys make good boyfriend's, husband's and father's! “You don’t have problems; you are the problem.” – Swami Chinmayananda Namaste ? ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 There are many threads on "nice guy syndrome". Below are several examples. It's something a lot of guys go through. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 (edited) Being nice is not a virtue if it stems from an inability to be violent. The one who does not kill another because he is unable to is not really moral, because he is inherently a slave to his limitations, much like say a cow would be. The one who is fully capable of being violent, evil and destructive but who chooses not to be can be said to be moral. So, ask yourself, what is the reason for why you are nice? Is it because you are a follower or because you are a leader? A leader is nice for a very different reason than a follow might be, and it is the case that women tend to be attracted to leaders. The problem with the one who has not the opportunity to be immoral is that once they are put into a position of power their true nature will be revealed. It is very easy to be nice when there will be consequences for it, but what about when you are in a position of absolute power? If you could snap your finger and kill anyone, how would that change you? There is always an uncertainty in the weak, because one cannot judge how they will act in positions of power. I observe this very often, when the "nice guy" gets together with a woman, and once comfortable and attached starting to treat her exactly the same way how the "bad guy" would. This is a basic power dynamic, think of Lord of the Rings. Power corrupts, if you never had power, how can one possibly know whether you are not going to be corrupted by it? Sure you can be nice and dandy when you are talking about how you don't need the ring, but once the ring is in your hands, things might very well change. And the weak, in general, are the ones who will be corrputed by power the most, because they never held it in their hands before. The most attractive thing is uncorrupted power. However it is very rare, and corrputed power is often more attactive than uncorrputed weakness. Edited November 19, 2019 by Scholar Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 7 minutes ago, Mikael89 said: “You don’t have problems; you are the problem.” – Swami Chinmayananda Namaste ? ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 @Mikael89 Are you trolling? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 @Mikael89 Your intention for posting the video came through loud and clear. “You don’t have problems; you are the problem.” – Swami Chinmayananda Namaste ? ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 because nice guys are just being nice to get the girl and they can sense that. Nice guys are only nice because they are afraid of sticking up for themselves. Nice guys are fake. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 (edited) 2 hours ago, Fede83 said: Why the good guy seems condemned to not found a girl which like him For what he is ? Because most girls have had dates with high value men. These men are not good nor nice they are arrogant assholes because they have options. You don't have options, that's why you are so nice. You are basically kissing a girl's ass thinking that if you kiss her ass long enough she might give it to you. So, you by not being an arrogant asshole tells her you are NOT a high value man with a lot of options. If you don't have options something must be wrong with you. The girl thinks: ''Why would i like you if no other woman likes you.'' Your SMV is determined by how other women perceive you not by how you, society or your friends, your boss etc. perceive you. My comments are not gonna be welcomed because this forum is blue pilled AF. 2 hours ago, Fede83 said: Is more a curse than a gift being a honest and good guy ? Yes. Absolutely. IME guys that lie the most are the ones that get the most (and the best) women. There is a direct correlation between being dishonest and a liar, and having success with women. Again my comment is not gonna be welcomed because this forum is blue pilled AF. 2 hours ago, Fede83 said: And what’s wrong with a good guy who stand for himself Everything, because good guys have no value. For a woman to get a nice guy is not that difficult, because they are everywhere, there is no challenge. And women in here are gonna tell you 2 hours ago, Anna1 said: Good guys make good boyfriend's, husband's and father's! OFC we do. But you girls are not attracted to nice guys, you actually feel repulsed by them. It's only when a woman realizes that she is not getting any younger and SETTLES for a nice guy right around when they're 30 something. And that's the bottom line. That's just the way it is. Now i am gonna lay back and watch how the whole forum tells me i am wrong, deluded, trapped and projecting go ahead, it amuses me. I am teaching you, not the otherwise. Remember I am 40 yo. Respect your elder's wisdom. ARC Edited November 19, 2019 by Arcangelo Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 2 hours ago, Nickyy said: Are you trolling? IMO he is always trolling. Sorry for ratting you out Mike. JK Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 I get attracted to nice guys all the time. I don't know where the perspective comes from, probably movies. In real life that doesn't happen. Attraction does not depend on whether a man is nice or not, it has got more to do with courtship and how you can please the other person. Being nice to people and being nice to her are two different things. She doesn't need a saint as a partner, why would she. She needs someone who can care and protect her and her kids in future. Are you able to provide that as a nice guy is the real question. Because if you can't provide that then she sees you as no good to you. I have been with both nice guys and bad guys. I won't say the experience differs massively. Sometimes a nice guy is only nice in the beginning only to win the girl, and when I realize that it's more hurtful than being with a bad boy who is at least honest and not trying to impress. A woman will not be impressed if you are dishonest with her, most often it's a sign of betrayal. I fell for a nice guy, thinking he is a nice guy but suffered terribly in the relationship because under the guise of nice guy, he was using covert way of controlling me and hurting me. I don't know what to say about bad guys. Seriously there is no such thing. I mean if they are really bad they would be in jail. Been with a guy who had been to jail. I can say bad boy. But he was honest. Never felt like he was manipulating me for something. There is something called as known rascality. If I know how much of a rascal a guy is going to be, I know the full extent of his rascality so I don't have to worry anymore but if I think a guy is too good to be true, I never know how his bad side is going to be because it never shows. Women who want to be with a bad guy to feel good or in position of control are dysfunctional. It's not a good thing.. All those women who like gang guys. Not a good role model. They don't do it out of love but for selfish reasons. Love is not just love but also romance which means passion. If you are going to be a nice guy lacking in passion, how do you think its going to work. But if you can work up the passion then good for you.. I think such phrases like nice guy bad boy are just words. In reality things are more ambiguous. It's more being good, honest, authentic, passionate and protective all at the same time. So don't stick to stereotypes. If by your logic, then all husbands in the world are bad boys lol. It doesn't work like that. Also a woman who is so hell bent on male image is not very intelligent. An intuitive woman likes a man for what he is worth. Show her what you can offer her. It all comes down to morality and survival. Morality because she doesn't want to be with a criminal or a threat to herself, survival means you should be good at sex. But even if all of the above is true in whatever way, the ultimate truth that triumphs all the little truths is that love withstands everything, true love. A woman who loves you truly will accept you for who you are and won't let you go unless you are a total jerk to her, nice guy or bad boy wouldn't matter. Try to be the best version of who you can be and invest in sincerity. Karma pays. INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 4 hours ago, Arcangelo said: Yes. Absolutely. IME guys that lie the most are the ones that get the most (and the best) women. There is a direct correlation between being dishonest and a liar, and having success with women. Lmao this is funny. This is like saying girls who do plastic surgeries and do all sorts of makeup tricks to hide their real looks will get the best men.. In reality truth will always find itself in some way into the relationship. And when the truth is revealed the other person is more repulsed than they would have been if you told the truth. Nothing less attractive than being insincere, dishonest and inauthentic when you want a person in your life, I mean if you don't want a hoe. A true man / woman will value integrity, sincerity, honesty, Authenticity, realness more than anything. Lies only leads to a web of lies. A man gets completely turned off when a woman lies if he is a true man and so does a good woman. She will never honor something she herself is not. If you don't want to land up with a hoe or a flaky cheap guy, then begin to cultivate sincerity and what you cultivate in yourself will also attract people who have that in them... INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues Cleared out ignore list today. .. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 Femininity is attracted to masculinity. Being nice does not exude masculine essence. Which is not to say there's anything wrong with being nice. Just don't expect it to make a girl wet. Women get attracted by boldness, confidence, and assertiveness. And other things, like wit and humor. You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 @Leo Gura do you know a root cause of not being assertive? There is nothing safe with playing it safe. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 I LOVE NICE GUYS! THEY ARE THE BEST! AND GIRLS THAT DON'T LIKE NICE GUYS AREN'T WORTH YOUR ATTENTION! END OF STORY! I have an opinion on everything Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 46 minutes ago, Leo Gura said: Femininity is attracted to masculinity. Being nice does not exude masculine essence. Which is not to say there's anything wrong with being nice. Just don't expect it to make a girl wet. Women get attracted by boldness, confidence, and assertiveness. And other things, like wit and humor. 8 hours ago, Mikael89 said: It's just a YouTube video which I haven't made. Calm down. @Mikael89 lol @Leo Gura depends on where one is at in the relationship. In my experience it's mostly about being present with what is and not getting lost in thought. You can be as nice as you like then when it's called for because you're always adapting to reality rather than neurotically adapting to a projected image. Everything that can be said about successful relationships are observations of this one aspect. Generally at the moment women are more conscious than men. Guys get lost in stories and miss what's really going on. That accounts for the general inability to understand women's behaviours. When a guy is in his head he's interpreting rather than understanding what's actually going on. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted November 19, 2019 5 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said: @Leo Gura do you know a root cause of not being assertive? Repressing red, repressing beige. Some yoga or some tai chi will fix that. Also look for any blue fixations. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
