How do I channel my sexual energy?

[assx95]

Try as I might, i have no women in my life who I regularly hang out with. 

And I get horny very often, sometimes jerking off 3-5 times a day. I am 24. 

Also, the women I have gone on dates with get flaky and uncertain about me, I get hurt very often as a result. So, I might give up on dating and on women for good, if i transcend those desires.

How do I channel excess sexual energy without jerking off? 

Edited November 18, 2019 by assx95

[Nickyy]

@assx95 Im not sure if you will ever be able to transcend desire. The kind of desire you're talking about is out of your direct or indirect control because it is in part caused by hormones, genetics, your body is at the right time to mate. 

But you can disidentify from desire and just allow it to be without getting psychologically involved in it and the suffering created when you don't get your desire met 

More people could do with that because if unchecked then desire can cause a lot of problems (Bill Clinton?) 

Probably a bit before you're time, but you get the picture?

The way to do it is understand that any fantasizing is a way to escape the present moment. The more you can live in the present moment the less your desire will linger and the less you will feel a need to blow it off via masturbation. Cos jerking off is the easiest way to discharge that pressure, isn't it? 

At age 24 once a day is more than enough. You don't want to jerk off anymore than that because you can start to cause yourself energy problems with a regular "5 a day" habit. 

The older you get the less frequent you should masturbate. Like for a 40 year old guy it should be once a week or once a fortnight.

Obviously can't prove any of this via science, because science can't measure subtle energy, but there is something to subtle energy. If you can preserve that subtle energy and keep it inside rather than discharging it, you will become more creative anyway. And women like that . 

[assx95]

@Nickyy I don't know if this happens with just me, but within 7 days of not jerking off, I feel a physical presence of a woman on top of me, when i am half-asleep/ half-awake, but it is rare that I can hold off for 7 days or more. I've had episodes of sexual sleep paralysis before as well. 

When I was in college, at 18-22, I would regularly do it 6-7 times a day without much fatigue (I would stay awake till late night, alternating between playing games and watching porn and midnight snacks- Hedonism 101) . I wish i had that level of intensity lol. 

But as I become more spiritual, I can see how I could be happy even without women in my life, there is no need to struggle as such chasing after women. Life is good, until you start having expectations of how things should be. 

This is easier said than done, the new genres in pornography like Deep-fake, are too good to pass up on but i've had my fair share of spills. 

[Nickyy]

@assx95 I try to stay away from porn because I noticed it can create negative anchors, it's addictive. 

6-7 times a day? Boy you deserve some kind of award for that lol. I remember too, I think my highest was like 12 times in one day when I was like 19. It's insatiable, especially when the weather is hot. 

Yeah you won't feel fatigue until later in life when it maybe shows up as other kinds of symptoms? This is all speculation of course because I haven't seen much science , but I just get the feeling that it's not that healthy a practice, even from a genetic standpoint nature only really cares that we pass on our genes early enough. That's why the hormones are running rampant until the mid 30s. After that nature doesn't need us anymore, that's when things could potentially start to go wrong and if you don't look after yourself early on in life, you can't really expect to hack mother nature later on in life and go for high energy and longevity because it's not a given. Maintaining health after 40 is like pushing a boulder up hill, its going against nature.

Objectively you can actually deplete mineral stores if you spank off too much. You lose some zinc, which you got to replace quickly because it's plays a part in regulating a lot of functions in the body. 

 

[Identity]

@assx95 I don’t think trying to trancend sex at this point, because you can’t get it, is comes from the right place.

Ive seen people trying to do that on this forum before. 
I can’t get sex —> Rationalization that it would’t be so bad without —> lets make something spiritual out of it and trancend it!

Id say just invest some time and energy into getting better with woman. 
Jerk off a bit less and use that energy to go out there and chat some woman up. Horniness carries one hell of a drive ???‍♂️
Than, after you’ve had the taste and the abundance, consider transcending it.

[ADD]

1 hour ago, assx95 said:

Try as I might, i have no women in my life who I regularly hang out with. 

And I get horny very often, sometimes jerking off 3-5 times a day. I am 24. 

Also, the women I have gone on dates with get flaky and uncertain about me, I get hurt very often as a result.

Think of it this way, if someone approaches you desperatly wanting something from you, how would you react?

Even if you don't seem needy outwards if your motivation to dating girls is getting something from them you send them energies of neediness that they pick up and the reaction is as you've witnessed.

It's the same thing other way around, if i get approached by a needy girl it's a total turn off for me. Girls often however don't act like that, the neediness of girls comes when they already know you and have had sex with you and then they are needy to take things further to get you commited to relationship etc.

It's way easier to get rid off neediness than transcending your sexual energy, i would start with that.

Start nofap->your sexuality starts to normalize from pornbased sexuality->focus on getting your confidence great->you attract girls with just who you are.

[LfcCharlie4]

@assx95 Instead of trying to transcend the sex drive (Which I personally would not recommend Sex is life force, and can be amazing) why not try and improve your social skills and relationship skills so you can build relationships with Women mate? 

The more you tell yourself you can't you won't be able to, there's a shit ton of material out there for helping guys get good with Women and build whatever kind of sex life they want. 

Watching porn 3-5 times isn't going to help you though it's kind of like a vicious circle with Porn, and can be VERY fucking addictive, just go on NoFap forums on Reddit, it's almost an unspoken about problem with young men, I mean look at the 'OnlyFans' craze on Twitter where men are paying $1000's to women for nudes and videos etc its absolutely crazy. 

'Your Brain on Porn" is a great book to read about Porn and overcoming the addiction. 

A couple good YouTube channels on game are John Anthony Lifestyle, Alpha Male Strategies and Playing With Fire (More social media game)

However, if you are going to go down the game route, try not to become a horrible person and lie and manipulate women for sex etc, some of these guys aren't the most conscious, so take the teaching and embody it how you wish mate, but please don't give up on relationships or 'transcend the sex drive' maybe that will happen naturally to some people but there's nothing 'wrong' about Sex, and relationships can be incredible!