If I see some traits of Feminism as a threat or unfair is because I´m biased?

[Arcangelo]

Yeah I have that post in my journal i have read it several times thank you. The discussion is not about that.

The discussion is about seeing some traits in Feminism that are a threat or unfair.

Do you see some traits in Feminism that are a threat or unfair @Serotoninluv ?

[Forestluv]

@Arcangelo The link is in reference to playing a male victim, which arose in this thread.

I shared some of my views regarding feminism and leadership above.

[Ananta]

2 hours ago, Parththakkar12 said:

Leadership is an aspect of masculinity, not femininity!

Lol! I was recently given a promotion to clinical manager and I didn't even ask for the job. They came to me and offered it. So much for your theory.

@Parththakkar12  Too many men having your attitude is what prompted the feminist movement to begin. 

[Arcangelo]

44 minutes ago, Arcangelo said:

Do you see some traits in Feminism that are a threat or unfair @Serotoninluv ?

Can you answer this question with a simple yes or no answer.

Yes or no?

[Forestluv]

28 minutes ago, Arcangelo said:

Can you answer this question with a simple yes or no answer.

No

(I cannot answer with a simple yes or no answer. The issue is much too nuanced for that).

[Arcangelo]

But is so simple, you either see them or you don't. It's a matter of perspective. Seems to me that you are trying to be politically correct.

It's like me asking you do you see that bird in the sky or no?

[Forestluv]

18 minutes ago, Arcangelo said:

It's like me asking you do you see that bird in the sky or no?

No, it is not. 

You are viewing gender through a lens that benefits you and your survival. There is a meta view to that. Yet you would need to let go of the view you are attached to and identified with to transcend it - which you aren’t willing to do. 

[Preety_India]

@Anna1

4 hours ago, Anna1 said:

Lol! I was recently given a promotion to clinical manager and I didn't even ask for the job. They came to me and offered it. So much for your theory.

@Parththakkar12  Too many men having your attitude is what prompted the feminist movement to begin. 

So true

[Parththakkar12]

1 hour ago, mandyjw said:

The quality of leadership is not specific to any gender. This is not true with humans nor with many animal species.

There's a difference between masculinity vs femininity and male vs female. Leadership is a masculine thing. Men and women have masculinity in them. If a woman wants to lead, she needs to tap into her masculinity! It can get tiring for a woman to just be in her masculine without also embodying her femininity, cuz her physical embodiment is feminine.

9 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

Why do you get to decide what traits count as leadership? Why doesn’t a woman get to decide the traits that make a good leader? . . . Why do you get to decide how women should behave in work environments? Why don’t women get to decide how you should act in a workplace?. . . 

This isn't me deciding anything. Feel free to study the qualities of masculinity vs femininity.

9 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

I’ve worked in environments with the alpha male leader that calls the shots. This is not an effective leader, imo. I would say they suck as a leader. They are unable to relate to people on a human level and they create dominant / submissive atmospheres that are toxic. I worked in a lab for years with this type of alpha leader. Sure, he was able to make us productive - yet the work environment was toxic. There was an underlying current of resentment and conflict that was suppressed. It was really unhealthy. These men do not make good leaders, imo. These days, I serve on hiring committees and I would never advocate hiring this type of job candidate.

Confidence, assertiveness and decisiveness can be good leadership qualities in certain contexts. Yet these traits alone would be a weak leader. A good effective leader has these traits and more. They also have empathy, compassion, humility and good listening skills. They can take advice and constructive criticism from others. They are willing to share and give credit to others. They are not insecure boys hiding behind an alpha male facade. . . 

A company's primary commitment is to be productive. You can be an alpha male type of guy who calls the shots, and still be compassionate and empathetic! The dysfunctions that you experienced weren't really cuz he was a good boss (in the sense that he got shit done by his employees), they were cuz he was treating his employees like cogs in a machine.

Confidence, assertiveness, decisiveness are absolutely necessary qualities to lead! Being empathetic and compassionate on top of that then helps you to be a leader who cares about the people rather than only himself.

9 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

I lived in the city you live in and went to CU. It is a progressive place. Look around and observe. You are in a great environment to develop and grow.

Unfortunately I'm not at CU anymore! I had a healing crisis and had to drop out. I've met lots of new-age spiritual people in Boulder, Denver that whole area. I grew a lot there!

Edited December 21, 2019 by Parththakkar12

[Parththakkar12]

Just now, Anna1 said:

Lol! I was recently given a promotion to clinical manager and I didn't even ask for the job. They came to me and offered it. So much for your theory.

@Parththakkar12  Too many men having your attitude is what prompted the feminist movement to begin. 

Congrats! Isn't relevant to what I'm saying though.

It's not men having my attitude that started feminism, it's oppression on a legal, systemic and social level. I'm not talking about oppressing women at all!

[Forestluv]

11 minutes ago, Parththakkar12 said:

This isn't me deciding anything. 

Lol. You are trying to control the narrative. 

[Parththakkar12]

What do you mean? I don't get it.

[Forestluv]

2 minutes ago, Parththakkar12 said:

What do you mean? I don't get it.

You seem to really like the narrative in your mind. There is a transcendence of that. Yet it would go off-topic. 

[Parththakkar12]

I've been raised by a single mother who was an 'independent woman who don't need no man'. I lacked a father growing up, or moreover, I lacked seeing my mom having a providing partner so that she could free herself from the responsibility of providing. Providing is not a pressure that most women want. I've seen my mom suffer first hand cuz of not having a partner! Most women thrive when they have an emotionally safe partner who's willing to take care of them and who makes them feel safe and secure physically. I'm not against letting women work, but once women go through the whole independence phase, mostly they choose not to and instead have a partner provide for them. (Stage Orange to Stage Green if you may)

I've come to my 'narrative' after years of shadow work, tapping into the consciousness of feminists, conservatives, etc. (which is the ultimate form of empathy) and resolving my shadows because of the feminist narratives. If you raise boys with the 'toxic masculinity' narrative, they grow up to really hate themselves as men. You'll know when you tap into the consciousness of these groups and have a look at the emotional dynamics that go on between them and 'the patriarchy'. Now of course they have their reasons, but the abuses their sons go through cannot be justified by those reasons.

Edited December 21, 2019 by Parththakkar12

[DrewNows]

theres definitely toxicity in the feminine and masculine perspectives 

And people aren’t raised consciously so ultimately there’s no one to blame. Once people start recognizing and owning their own bias, empowerment will only remain 

@Parththakkar12 What did you mean by you had  a “healing crisis”? (I’m curios) 

 

[Parththakkar12]

@DrewNows Thanks for asking! Alright so I was this Stage Orange type grad student who was all about climbing the university hierarchy, doing hard-nosed research and working all the time. I achieved everything that I wanted to achieve. Once that happened, I started to feel very lonely and I discovered a lot of unmet emotional needs. It's just then that I started stumbling upon the New Age, people like Infinite Waters, Teal Swan (I think she's very very evolved though), etc. I really started to tap into my emotions. What I discovered was that I was depressed and on the brink of suicide! Had I not tapped into my emotions, I'd have been in real danger of self-harm.

So my emotional healing took a front seat to my career and related decisions. From the outside it looks like a healing crisis, i.e. I'm not doing anything atm and I had to move back with my mom. Right now I'm living with her and I'm doing my best to find my life purpose. Leo's course is helping me though!

I discovered a lot of unconscious patterns, a whole new realm of emotional consciousness and it's been an epic roller-coaster ride!

[DrewNows]

@Parththakkar12 oh gotcha haha excellent!

Had similar experience a few years out of college

what a crazy journey and time to be alive. Once spirituality finds us it’s like game over and the hopping realities continues  

[Parththakkar12]

That is so true!

[Ananta]

8 hours ago, Parththakkar12 said:

I'm not against letting women work

Oh well, thanks so much for "letting" me work sir.

[Parththakkar12]

Just now, Anna1 said:

Oh well, thanks so much for "letting" me work sir.

I used that verbiage cuz in the traditional patriarchy, women aren't allowed to work! This is a system by men for men originally, and women don't get to work if men don't allow it traditionally speaking. What I mean is that I'm not "against letting women work", as I've heard people the age of my grandpa say.

Damn I realized how seriously triggering this could be after I wrote it out! But seriously though, I'm thinking about if there  was a feminist movement not longer than 500 years ago, the king or whoever would crush it completely with violence. Contemporary women have a pretty weird relationship with patriarchy now that I think about it. I mean, yeah the system today is all for giving women equal rights, but these equal rights have been given to women because men approved of them not longer than 200 years ago. These are the equal rights that were hard-won by the feminist movement. This is what I mean when I refer to 'patriarchial oppression of women'. It still goes on in various parts of the world.

I'm not trying to belittle women here, I'm just stating the reality of how human survival has worked and is working under the patriarchy. There never was a chance of equality and there never will be (unless we're talking about equal rights under a patriarchial system). The power of women, once again, isn't trying to beat men at their strengths, but it's to own their unique role in this world and get in touch with their own feminine essence.

Edited December 21, 2019 by Parththakkar12