Worst fear

[Codrina]

I just read Leo's comment on a topic.

'The whole point of spirituality is to face what is true and face all of one's fears.'

My worst fear is that I will eventually become an alcoholic like my grandmother and my father. That I will succumb to the dark depths of the mind into a one-end journey - madness - like other family members - or just plain stupidity and addiction. That I will keep on living my life like I am someone special and end up doing shit - and a tragic - yet somehow liberating - homelessness 

Should I just try them out?

[Eph75]

If I fear being lit on fire, facing my fear does not mean that I should light myself on fire. Instead reason with your fear, understand it and the power it holds will subside. Having a fear can be irrational and when resoning with it, you might see that it is false. 

Alcoholism in the family is not an irrational fear. But it may be irrational to you. It may be rational and you need to understand or change something that you do, which might be fueling the fear. I.e. you might trigger the fear when you drink but you drink very little and very seldom. Mixed with awarness of risk, that fear is irrational and you can let it go. If you drink like a motherfucker and you have that fear, well then it is rational and you need to create change to overcome it. In both cases you face your fear. Can you overcome it? Who knows. 

[Milos Uzelac]

I feel you I generally have an depressive ideation and have one today when failing at an important task and succumbing to Internet pornography in order to numb the pain that I now felt today and over the past month or so at a slow path of suicide that my mother took because of still anti societal habits of getting up late, being stuck in my head and not helping family members around and a deep cynicism and judgement to the way my culture works stage blue nationalism and even slightly at some parts red criminal/tribal solidarity mostly is pressuring me since I am not fulfilling my life purpose of a sociologist that I intuitively feel and feel happy about when visualising myself in it to become one of them eventually or to isolate myself and slowly rot away homeless because of not adapting to their stage survival struggle. These depressive ideations are so strong at times that its hard for me to have the will to communicate to anybody or feel for and be sympathetic my family members shared pain for me at times and I strongly feel that I if continue down this path of not being physical skilled and yet having to work a laborious job and failing to finish academy and being stuck that suicide would be the only way out of the suffering and would follow down the path of my mother of isolating myself, abandoning the family and killing myself eventually when the mental pain of my life position intensifies too much. I feel to that if I am not conscious, loving and strong enough I will follow my mothers genetically predisposed upbringing and patterns of behaviour and selfish personality traits in to killing myself by jumping off a building eventually. I feel and think this heavily when I look at my current life's direction so I can't come to grips when contemplating that this is just my belief. 

[cetus]

@Codrina The most effective way of not becoming an alcoholic is by not consuming alcohol.

It's not a matter of being afraid or fearful.