Serious help (Leo please reply)

[Yahya]

Hi people,

I am beginning my intermediate and I need some advice from you to my challenges and biggest frustration in life. Also I am starting this thread to because Leo asked me to send it to you in one of your videos called ,"How to make your life extraordinary-Actualized.org." My challenges and biggest frustration s in my life are:

-Bullying. I get in fight at least once a week in my school. Also I am 15 years old. I get called so many bad names and people now call me a nickname which is a bad name.

- University tuition fees. I don't have any money and I don't know from where do I take my University fees.

- Confidence. My confidence is extremely low. 

-Self esteem. My self esteem is extremely low and my participation in my everyday life is terrible as it were that I wish I were dead.

-Depression. I am depressed in my life and a few suicidal thoughts.

Questions help me with life and please shoot videos on a few of them.

- How do I pay my tuition fees.

-How do I improve my participation in day to day life?

- How do I stop getting bullied and called bad names?

-How to improve my confidence?

-How to improve my self esteem?

- Do I need to be an employee in order to become an employer?

-How do I feel good?

-How do I accomplish ambitious goals?

Strategies which worked on me:

- Knowledge. I don't know a lot of strategies and things out there so the only thing that worked on me so far was knowledge.

Please give me solutions and advice to each of my frustrations and give me a short answer for each of my questions.

Thank you.

Edited November 14, 2019 by Yahya
Grammar mistakes.

[Raptorsin7]

Hey @Yahya. It seems you are going through a very difficult time in your life right now. I recommend beginning a meditation practice to help cope with some of your problems. You are still young, and sometimes being young is hard and you have to find a way to just cope with your situation. Also, I would recommend just trying to avoid the bullies or find a way to get them to leave you alone. Fighting is a bad idea, and if you can find a way for the bullies to get off your back that might dramatically improve the quality of your life. Good luck man, feel free to message me if you need advice.

[Nak Khid]

Yahya, what are your interests?

[Proactive]

what are they calling you?

 

And why are you in university at 15?

 

Honestly, leo has covered every possible topic possible in the entire universe.

Just google

"how to make money actualized.org"

"how to improve self-confidence actualized.org"

[SoothedByRain]

Keep the following four things in mind. Remind yourself of them 20+ times a day.

• Progress, not perfection. You'll never be perfect. We neurotically seek perfection in everything we do and it often stalls us. forget perfection. Focus solely on 0.5% growth spurts. They Compound.
• Failure = Growth. Failure is good. Negative feelings are not "bad", they should be observed and focused upon. Negative emotions are guiding lights. Mindful observation of failures enables proactive progress in the face of failure. There is no failure, there is no perfection . . . there is only growth and learning.
• Breath. Deep, slow, mindful breathing.
• Stupid is a naive word. stupidity doesn't exist, there is only naivety and we're all naive. Being naive isn't "bad". observing such allows one to go into learning, training and progress. Attempt to ditch the word stupid and embrace Not-Knowing.

Read books. Lot and lots of books. Don't cling to an ideology. Be openminded. Observe everything. Try not to compare yourself to others. Try to understand why the human brain neurotically does so and this will help you to flow. Understanding can bring peace.

The 5 steps to Growth

1. Awareness
2. Understanding
3. Acceptance
4. Positive Action
5. Positive Growth/Change

 

 

Edited November 14, 2019 by SoothedByRain

[dvdas]

When I was at your age they've bullied the shit out of me. 

Learn martial arts. When I started defending myself they stopped. 

You will not be anxious at all since you will know that you can defend yourself. 

And dont forget that bullies are just unsecure people. Just stop feed them. They want's you to feel bad. If they can't do it, they get crazy

[Ibn Sina]

- Stop getting bullied by fighting the  shit out of them, complaining to authority, combination of both, there's no other way.

- Gain self esteem, confidence, by being  good at something, be it academics, game of chess, being a great poet or writer , be a great singer , dancer, whatever  that will get you approval from people.

- How will you pay your tuition fees? Well, if you can't then who told you to go to a university. Either you need to take loan, or don't study, but you will have to pay the money whether you have got it in your pocket or  not.

- An employer is someone who has got into the position of employing people, which means either they climbed up the  ladder (as an employee) or they started the company.

- No one  , unless you have become a Buddha or have taken 5-meo DMT 100 times, can feel good all the time. That said, if you want to feel good, then do things that make you feel good. Example , things I do to feel good are- watch movies, read novels, learn and study things (learning makes me feel good automatically), talk with friends, cut off blood suckers and many more.

- 

How do I accomplish ambitious goals? Work. You want to become a doctor? Work 10 hours a day. You want to be an engineer? Work 10 hours a day. You want to start something like actualized.org? Work 10 hours a day..

That said, I have to say that by now I have come to that stage of personal development where I know that  reading such stuffs as I wrote has no value. What I wrote has 0 net value. It is not going to change you and you will be the same person you were and suffer like you were sufferinng, but you might feel good due to the clear, concise and unclouded answers I have written.

Change  comes from massive action.

[88888will88888]

Focus on what you love about life

[SgtPepper]

Everybody has given great advice. I'd recommend looking to see if you meet with your local school counselor or a therapist. It sounds like you are in need of life and coping skills. Having someone to talk to in person when you need can be helpful. You're only 15, there is still a lot of time to develop these skills. 

 

[Bridge to Infinity]

shoot up the school. lol jokes.

 

1. Start by reading the book "6 Pillars of Self Esteem" actually read it, you can torrent it if you're low on money. 
2. Get a Partime Job that you enjoy, more specifically a social job, this will help pay some of the tuition as well as help with socialization -----> More assertivity.
3. Start Lifting weights.
4. Cut out all bull shit youtube self help, including Leos stuff, that kind of content is irrelevant to you.
5. Set little goals and achieve them, eg... Gain 10 pounds of muscle, 
6. If change is difficult for you and you cant focus, try ADHD medication (ritalin or adderall) for a couple of months, you will change your life drastically.

[remember]

@Yahya  you are 15 so you can massively change in the course of one year! 15,16, 17, 18 are the transformational ages, but you have to take it seriously! one point of course is outer transformation, unfortunately that`s a part of the game of being part of the group - they probably are all into looks, fashion, music, coolness thing. so you could transform in one of these aspects like bridge to infinity says in point 3 for example. if you want to change, you can...

also it would be interesting to know about the dynamics of people calling you names. is it one person? a group? usually there is a driving force behind it, one or two people in the center. are you usually alone or do you have friends around?  hanging everywhere alone is usually one of the problems, so if you try to make one or two friends, this might stop  the bullying. best is also to keep more to someone with a high status in the class but more because of social reasons. but any kind of koalition/friendship might work to improve the situation. try to figure out the political class dynamics.

Edited November 22, 2019 by remember