What is sexual attraction?

[Swagala]

I've been trying to become more conscious about what's happening when I get "turned on" by something attractive/beautiful tovget a deeper understanding of it.

I wanted to share the findings I got from focusing on the times when I become sexual attracted to something. I would ppreciate hearing your own explanation for what sexual attraction is.

Here it goes. When I see something or someone that turns me on, there's a wanting to become closer. Almost to become whole or one. When I see something attractive/beautiful which turns me on, it's like I see that thing as something else other than me or separate. So when I see something beautiful and believe that it's separate from me, I feel the need to reconcile with it or become one. When I start looking at the beautiful/attractive things or people as if they're a part of me, a different form of me, not separate, the sense of sexual attraction disappears.

I'd like to add that sometimes when I become sexual attracted to something, for me, I feel like I'm less than them. Maybe it's just me and my low self-esteem but when I see beauty and then believe that they're separate from me, that's when I feel like I'm less. The beauty is separate from me, so that means I'm not beauty/beautiful. I then become attracted to them or feel the need to become closer to them so I can realize I'm sort of at the same level as them; that I can be loved by something beautiful.

[Nickyy]

@Swagala Thats just your desire to become complete. We look for it in relationships . It's not something bad, it's just part of being a separate identity. If you understand that this is just a craving, and that you're looking in the wrong place for wholeness, and that you're identified as this self who's seeking, the seeker will disappear. 

[TrynaBeTurquoise]

Sexual attraction is the polarity, or difference in energetic charge between the masculine and feminine, in whatever form they take. A stable unchanging consciousness of the masculine being the opposite of the chaotic changing nature of the feminine. 

[universe]

Besides being included in your DNA its also culturally constructed. While growing up we see other people of our own gender react to the opposite gender and we imitate that behaviour. Then along comes Movies/Books/Television/Commercials etc., here specific attributes are displayed as being valuable. We take notes. We want to have it.

[Leo Gura]

@Swagala Your question more broadly is: What is desire?

Tis a good one to contemplate.

Why desire anything at all?

[Anton Rogachevski]

1 minute ago, Leo Gura said:

@Swagala Your question more broadly is: What is desire?

Tis a good one to contemplate.

Why desire anything at all?

Or "Why not?"

[Leo Gura]

21 minutes ago, Anton Rogachevski said:

Or "Why not?"

Why do you not desire death?

Think about it.

[Anton Rogachevski]

4 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Why do you not desire death?

Think about it.

It's more correct to say desire to not die. To desire or not is the same thing.

Actually I'm increasingly desiring it because I've completely changed the way I'm looking at it. Of course there is fear, but isn't that a different creature?

[Harikrishnan]

40 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

@Swagala Your question more broadly is: What is desire?

Tis a good one to contemplate.

Why desire anything at all?

A deep craving for something one doesnt have. It arise when you feel inadequate or not enough and by obtaining it you think you will feel complete. So in order to feel complete you crave things you dont have and go chasing it and take action.

Why craving is not there for everything but certain things? 

It maybe based on values one identify with for the things you value you crave.

Why desire anything at all? 

??????

Edited November 11, 2019 by Harikrishnan

[Lento]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

Why desire anything at all?

I can come up with many theories, but ultimately it's unexplainable. And desire is indescribable.

Just like God. Perhaps desire is God?

Edited November 11, 2019 by Lento

[Leo Gura]

6 hours ago, Lento said:

I can come up with many theories,

I didn't suggest that you to come up with theories. Contemplation/inquiry is not a matter of guess-work or speculation.

Quote

but ultimately it's unexplainable. And desire is indescribable.

You don't know that. You haven't even bothered to contemplate or observe what desire is. Maybe if you looked at it, you'd find out. After all, there it is -- in you. If you can't understand it, who can? After all, we're not talking about understanding moon rocks or kangaroos, we're talking about the desires you feel and act out every day.

Is desire really unexplainable?

Quote

Just like God. Perhaps desire is God?

Everything is God. So that doesn't help you.

[Lento]

53 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Is desire really unexplainable?

Yes. It's unexplainable, just as much as love is.

We can have our theories about relating desire to survival, but they aren't enough to explain the unexplainable. In the end of the day, it just is what it is.

(P.S. I'm not a newbie).

[Leo Gura]

18 minutes ago, Lento said:

Yes. It's unexplainable, just as much as love is.

We can have our theories about relating desire to survival, but they aren't enough to explain the unexplainable. In the end of the day, it just is what it is.

(P.S. I'm not a newbie).

You lack nuance, conflating absolute and relative domains.

Just because there is an Ultimate Mystery doesn't mean we can't explain why there's shit in the toilet, and fix it.

Your absolutist logic can be used to say, "Well, who really knows how the shit got there? It's all a grand mystery."

Or maybe you just forgot to flush and are making up colorful spiritual stories to cover your ass.

[Lento]

@Leo Gura

I appreciate and understand the importance of the relative, and I am actively working on transcending my survival. Come on Leo! Don't treat me like that.

[Leo Gura]

@Lento The contemplation of questions like What is desire? is an important aspect of this work.

Don't poo-poo it, is the point.

[Lento]

7 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

@Lento The contemplation of questions like What is desire? is an important aspect of this work.

Don't poo-poo it, is the point.

You're right, and I'm sorry. But I'm not poo-pooing anything. I shouldn't have jumped to the end and given the ultimate answer just yet. Other people need contemplation as well, I shouldn't ruin it for them.

Edited November 11, 2019 by Lento