###Got a powerful vision, but...

[Existence]

After wasting many years doing self help like a sheep, i finally got the realization that it is not enough to merely hear those in a "one ear in, other ear out" fashion.To get what i want to get out of self help i have to contemplate them deeply for hours.

It is a harsh truth to accept when you had built your entire identity around self help, even taking pride about it. But deep inside, you know it is shallow work and aware about it's fragility. and You carefully wipe out all suspensions that this knowledge might be too shallow to work out. Successfully deceiving yourself for years until some talls you, you are doing shit.

So, yeah I stopped blaming self help products and have taken responsibilities to go deep, this time. In my first try , i realized, it requires much efforts than i previously thought. Very hard to follow through. To solve, i made a vision for life, something powerful that could push me through obstacles that i need to face.

But didn't worked so well. I found out doesn't matter how powerful it is, the inspiration doesn't last long. Pushing through 1 or 2 obstacles, it gives up. And as usual, my mind turns to the 'immediate gratifications'.

Where is the bug, in finding a powerful passion?, or in connecting with it more frequently?

Oh ,and one more thing. We know, clinging to identities creates suffering. Actualizers let go their self. Then what are we doing by creating visions. Aren't they more 'identities' that one has to conserve?

If someone's identity is- "I'm somebody who allways lets go of all identities." Would that be considered as an identity?

Thanks for reading.

Edited November 6, 2019 by Existence

[Hello from Russia]

I think there is an unhealthy sense of identity, often inauthentic one, the one you were forced to wear for survival needs and then there is an authentic one, it's about the character you really want to play in life by your own choice, the character you enjoy, yet you don't attach to it. I think having the latter is good and is worthy of pursuing, "finding yourself" so to speak

[Forestluv]

3 hours ago, Existence said:

If someone's identity is- "I'm somebody who allways lets go of all identities." Would that be considered as an identity?

This gets into the "I AM" realization. People are conditioned to add on to the "I AM" and identify with that add-on. Then a personal story arises. For example: "I AM. . . a man". Here there is identification of being "a man" and a man story follows. . . "I AM a man. As a man, I am more masculine than woman. As a man, I should be assertive and decisive. I should take control". . . Or another story may arise, depending on the conditioning of the human. . . Or "I AM Russian", "I AM an artist", "I AM a person with ADD", "I AM often insecure" , "I AM smart", "I AM stupid". . . and on and on and on. . . 

See what happens when there is only "I AM". Just that I AMness - with nothing extra added on. What is the direct experience of simply "I AM"?

[Aquarius]

57 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

This gets into the "I AM" realization. People are conditioned to add on to the "I AM" and identify with that add-on. Then a personal story arises. For example: "I AM. . . a man". Here there is identification of being "a man" and a man story follows. . . "I AM a man. As a man, I am more masculine than woman. As a man, I should be assertive and decisive. I should take control". . . Or another story may arise, depending on the conditioning of the human. . . Or "I AM Russian", "I AM an artist", "I AM a person with ADD", "I AM often insecure" , "I AM smart", "I AM stupid". . . and on and on and on. . . 

See what happens when there is only "I AM". Just that I AMness - with nothing extra added on. What is the direct experience of simply "I AM"?

Loved reading this. I don't really identify with any of these, I just... am. Today I visited a guy friend and he said I'm the first girl being in his home. I was like... why does it count like I am a girl? I am. I just am. I don't really identify with being tall or weird or a woman even, I just am, and I experience.

It honestly was weird.