I put aside my LP/Passion for financial freedom

[ivankiss]

Ever since I was a kid, my biggest dream was to become a professional musician. To do nothing else but what I loved. To live, eat and breathe my passion. Music.

It was just so obvious to me, even at a very young age; that's what I'm here to do. That's what I'll dedicate my life to. Every moment of it.

Even in times when I was doing things that at first glance had nothing to do with my passion, I saw the links.

I knew I'll find my way, no matter which route I take.

I dropped out of high school knowing that. I worked as a waiter for a while, knowing I'll be quitting soon. Everything was temporary. And in my mind, every step was getting me closer to realizing the dream. 

Three and a half years ago, I took things to another level. 

Even though my job was offering me a really nice, comfortable living, I could not stand still anymore. The fire within me was burning so wildly. I knew it was time to answer the call. So I gathered all my courage, quit my job and surrendered myself to the unknown based on nothing but blind faith.

I embarked on a journey, an adventure, leaving everything behind. Everything but my heart and love for music. I was ready to fully align with my purpose. No matter what tomorrow brings.

And boy did it feel great. I was never so alive. So vibrant. So on my track. So fulfilled. Blissful. Proud. Confident.

I was a traveling musician. And even though I was kinda struggling financially, it did not bother me too much at the time. I was producing beats for people I met along the way, mixed and mastered a few tracks for some bands, played a few solo gigs. I was getting by. But I wasn't really focused on my music. I wasn't selling any of it. It was mainly about service to others. So after a while, that got me thinking again. I wanted to have a source of income that would allow me to fully focus on my own material. Doing all this stuff for others was quite time and energy consuming.

On top of it all, I fell in love with a girl. Hard. We moved in together very soon after. And that triggered an even bigger need for more money. I wasn't flowing around so carefree and effortlessly anymore. I started feeling more and more pressure.

We were still traveling and that was cool, but I was less and less focused on music, again. I shifted my focus on figuring out a way to earn online. As much as possible, with a least amount of effort.

I started "chasing money".

That ended up being a journey on its own. Tried tons of things. Some stupid and ridiculous, others just simply irrelevant and inappropriate. Lots of hope. Devastation. Effort. Failure.

It took me more than a year of this mad cycling, but I finally discovered THE THING. THE WAY. It's just so obviously perfect. It fits right into the picture. Compliments my lifestyle. My ultimate dream. And if mastered, it requires little to no effort. And offers absolute financial freedom. It's an unlimited source of financial abundance. It is the very core of the financial world. It's where money lives, lol.

But. It must be mastered fully.

So that's what I've been putting in all of my time and energy for the past year or so. Studied tons, failed some, got up, continued learning. All in order to master this craft. To have a smooth and steady flow of income and finally get back to music, full force. Without having to worry about finances, ever again.

It became clear to me a while ago; I don't want my art, my music to be compromised. I don't want to put any pressure on my passion just because I need to pay those bills and afford living. I want my process of creating to be pure and undisturbed. So ultimately, I know why I'm doing all this. I know it's worthwhile. But it's fucking rough at times. It feels like I'm putting my soul on hold. On "stand by". It's been so long since I was in my creative flow. 

 

Days pass like minutes and there is doubt at every corner. 

"Is this really what I'm supposed to be doing?"

"Should I go back, find a steady job and start all this over, again?"

"Should I settle with the idea of just getting by and playing music for myself and those passing by?"

"I dream of fancy equipment, studios and touring. Are my dreams unrealistic? Unreachable?"

"Is this just not meant for me? Is there a bigger, divine plan that I'm unaware of?"

"Do I just feel unworthy, deep inside? Is that what's making this so difficult?"

"Should I just keep pushing? I did not come this far to give up! Everything will work out perfectly."

If I give in, these thoughts lead to nothing but paralysis. Demotivation. Madness.

Thank God I became good at letting them go. Not buying into any nonsense. But that's yet another thing. Combine deep, intense, hardcore awakening with this crazy journey of mine and things can feel just straight over the top. 

Haha.

I don't really know where I'm going with this. Not searching for an answer or any advice really. Though I will surely appreciate your thoughts and views.

I guess I just needed to express things. Get it all off my chest.

Thank you for listening, actualized.org

 

Edited November 7, 2019 by ivankiss

[LfcCharlie4]

I'm sure Leo will disagree with me, but as long as the business you're talking about isn't immoral/ unethical I think it's a solid plan, it's hard to focus on your music when you have a girl moaning that you can't even afford your groceries this week. (Extreme Example i know)

 The issue comes with getting addicted to that money, let's say as an extreme you build it to somewhere in the region of 300k-1M a year, like not many people need more money than that to sustain their lifestyle, and someone presents you an opportunity to take it to 10M a year, then 20, 30 etc#

Will you be able to turn that down and commit to your Music when you see your business partners flexing all over Social Media and in your Groupchats? 

 I completely support your Financial Freedom goal as I'm doing the same thing (although I love my online businesses and feel it could tie in to my purpose) but I can see in my industry people becoming obsessed with money more than anything and it is easy to fall into that trap, so just be careful I guess, but yes having money and freedom is fucking awesome, knowing you won't have to be a 9-5 slave like everyone around you is an amazing feeling, but then so is buying Rolexes and Rolls Royces you probably don't need if you're not careful....

[ivankiss]

@LfcCharlie4 Get your point.

Thanks.

Thing is; I'm completely alone in this business. There are no partners. No competition. 

Yes, I could partner up. Or even mentor a group. But that would not affect my income. If anything it would just consume more of my time and require more effort. Which is not what I'm interested in.

There is a possibility that I'd end up wanting more and more money, yes. But that's not necessarily an issue. That wouldn't require more time or effort on my behalf. Only more money to invest in the business. Everything stays exactly the same; merely the numbers change. That's why it's so perfect and compliments my LP so well.

But again. Have to master things.

Btw; the girlfriend I mentioned is out of the picture. So I'm doing all of this for myself now 

Edited November 7, 2019 by ivankiss

[Shakazulu]

Right now my life’s a broken smile but I have a question- did you pursue money because of her?

[ivankiss]

@Shakazulu Good question.

I don't really know.

I was definitely under a lot of pressure because of being with her. I had a sense of urgency; like I needed to come up with something fast.

But I suppose I would've pursued financial freedom anyways. With or without her. It's just that I'd do it in a more relaxed way. Without all the panic, stess and headache.

I would've let it come to me, instead of chasing it. If you know what I mean 

[LfcCharlie4]

@ivankiss lol you're intriguing me to investigate this opportunity, sounds like trading but I could be on the complete wrong path. 

And, exactly, there's nothing wrong with wanting money, it's the why behind it that matters and your why makes perfect sense. 

 At the end of the day it's your life and you get to spend it how you want to man, and if FF frees you up to pursue what makes you happiest, then go for it 100000%, unless of course this opportunity leaves you despressed etc. 

[Water]

@ivankiss I hope this post is an inspiration to others as much as it is to me. I'm truly moved. This post feels like a RAW unfiltered photograph.  I wish nothing more then for you to actualize your dreams, I also wish there was a way we could help. 

Sometimes it bothers me to see corporations getting to actualize their shallow dreams of acquiring money with the help of hundreds or thousands of people, but so many of us are forced to let go of ours because it's just to difficult. I get we each have our own individual journeys but what has become of us? where's the sence of community? 

Funny how we consider indigenous people "backwards''. Anyway I know this is a long shot but if you could think of anyway for us to help please reach out. My prayers are with you brother ?

[Aeris]

Don't try to do or be anything.

Just 'be'

Maybe you and I will never be high musician' in this Era. And for good reasons.

You won't follow the recipe for success cause you don't aim it.

Most success artist nowaday self actualized their brains to the point of just becoming tool of the industry. ( Electronic music )

Some people like to follow recipe and 'what works'

Others do their shit.

I see myself having a tiny success in music 35/40 but for the good reasons and without my music and soul being zombyfied by the industry.

It's a dream that being a musician is better than being where you are.

Consciousness doesn't evolve only because of the path. Your mind is the only path to freedom.

Of course you will or not be a musician..but I wouldn't worry about it.

Focus on your soul. Your soul will tell you what feels right.

You don't even need answers back. In fact you have all your answers. There is just a piece of your mind that feel threatened by 'loosing your dream'.

Loose everything - see what remains

Edited November 9, 2019 by Aeris

[ivankiss]

@LfcCharlie4 Yup. It is trading, indeed. Forex. I really love it. I cannot believe such an opportunity even exists haha. It really suits my personality. There is no resistance towards trading. Or improving my skills. I enjoy the learning process. 

It's just that I feel like there is a temporary conflict between it and my biggest passion/purpose (music). Which is, at the end of the day, illusory. I only must balance things in a right manner, that's all. This chapter is supposed to be challenging 

@Water Thank you brother. It is appreciated.

I've been a lone wolf since forever haha. Going after it all by myself ain't nothing new. But I hear you, totally. I too dream of a loving, supportive community. One that encourages individuals, instead of trying to crush their ambitions. Perhaps a day will come when we all wake up to a world like that.

@Aeris Thanks, brosif. I hear ya.

But here's a thing;

Being = music 

Breathing = music.

I do not blink without it being for and because of music. It's simply why I am and who I am. 

As an individual, and even beyond. It is my very core.

Giving up on the dream of "making it big" is not the issue here. Been going through cleansings. There is no desperation, no need. 

What there is, is unstoppable, infinite passion. That never rests. It yearns to express itself. To be heard and seen. Shared as Gods biggest gift.

That's the real "reason" why I do what I do, and will never stop. I could not stop even if I wanted to. There is absolutely no meaning behind it and that's the real beauty of it. 

It means nothing, but it is everything.

The journey itself is a melody. A rhythm. A masterpiece 

[Guest SirVladimir]

@ivankiss Trader here, too. I wonder whether you've found a consistent technique and whether you've been able to sustain yourself. Which one? It took me multiple hard lessons to see through the curtain. And nobody speaks of it. Careful, never stop asking! Information out there is flawed. 

Edited November 15, 2019 by SirVladimir

[Preety_India]

Trader here too. Helps me a lot with my financial needs along with my regular job. 

Most importantly if I want to buy something for my spirituality and some art pieces can be pretty expensive but my side work of trading takes care of it. 

I'd suggest you that you please focus on money because that makes a huge difference and other things go much smoother. 

Once you got the money box ticked you can pretty much carry on with any alternative career. 

Goodluck and best wishes on your life journey and purpose 

[ROOBIO]

On 15/11/2019 at 3:06 PM, Preety_India said:

Trader here too. Helps me a lot with my financial needs along with my regular job. 

Most importantly if I want to buy something for my spirituality and some art pieces can be pretty expensive but my side work of trading takes care of it. 

I'd suggest you that you please focus on money because that makes a huge difference and other things go much smoother. 

Once you got the money box ticked you can pretty much carry on with any alternative career. 

Goodluck and best wishes on your life journey and purpose 

What do you trade? and how do you get into it?

[Nak Khid]

On 11/9/2019 at 8:46 AM, ivankiss said:

 

But here's a thing;

Being = music 

Breathing = music.

 

No music is an attachment like money or love.
These things are a part of life but know what their place is.
And music is a great gift to the world

I recommend this:  
asses the amount of time per day you need to maintain your survival with no frills
add a couple of hours more for unpredictability

The rest of your time full dedication to music until 2023

Then make an assessment as you how your want to balance your life.

I've seen people but an intense one year into creativity, they over-exert, burn out and then quit

One needs a few years to test this.  
Full commitment to music and the survival activity is only to support the music.
Mark down a date to reassess your life and then forget about the date and dedicate completely
but with basic survival  needs accounted for
Focusing on money will destroy the whole thing. 
Making music and surviving requires some money but money itself is not the focus.
Great artists pay dues

There is also a large luck and talent factor.  Don't worry about that
put the time in, a plan of a set number of years and stick to it


 

 

 

[LfcCharlie4]

@Nak Khid  I would really recommend not trying to practice 'Non-Attachment', that is a by-product of realizing yourself as Natural Pure Awareness, as who is there to be attached then? 

If you do, you could end up resisting things like money and relationships and sex etc, which will just create more blockages in your life. 

[Nak Khid]

5 minutes ago, LfcCharlie4 said:

@Nak Khid  I would really recommend not trying to practice 'Non-Attachment', that is a by-product of realizing yourself as Natural Pure Awareness, as who is there to be attached then? 

If you do, you could end up resisting things like money and relationships and sex etc, which will just create more blockages in your life. 

You have it backwards non-attachment is what leads to removes the veil over awareness.
non-attachment does not mean renunciation.  It means you can hold money but it will bring suffering if you hold it too tightly and constantly seek more. 

On 10/29/2019 at 10:10 AM, LfcCharlie4 said:

Complete Financial Freedom Before Life Purpose

On 11/4/2019 at 5:23 PM, Leo Gura said:

@LfcCharlie4 That's what I did. But it was very painful and soul-crushing.

In practice, once you have a bunch of money and success from a non-purpose business, you will become so attached to it that you are not likely to ever find your true purpose. You will get comfortable and lazy and finding your LP will become too risky and inconvenient.

Money and success easily corrupts the mind, getting it to justify whatever brings in that money as "good". You will start telling yourself things like, "Well, what if this thing I'm doing is already my LP? It probably is. Why rock the boat?"

The enemy of the great is the good.

Besides which, you could easily lose all your money before you reach some kind of level of total security and freedom. Chasing money does not guarantee you money. The point of aligning with your LP is that it gives you the super-human passion necessary to become successful. It's hard to become successful at something your heart isn't into.

 

 

[Nak Khid]

One will have to take back seat, trading or music even though you love them both.
I say cap the lesser one at a level only to support your main focus.

With music, if your dedicate to it as fully as possible (but not attach to it)  it could led you beyond what you expect.
Or not, that has to be time tested

 

[LfcCharlie4]

@Nak Khid it’s really not, you will be attached while you believe you are the little I or the ego as it is commonly known. 

When you dissolve the I thought your attachments will naturally drop as there’s is nobody to suffer there is nobody to be attached.

there is still an ego after enlightenment though, it’s very paradoxical. 

 

For some reason people believe life ends after enlightenment, in my experience so far it has only just begun, and the work certainly does not stop, but is only beginning...

Edited November 17, 2019 by LfcCharlie4

[ivankiss]

Is a bird attached to flying? Or singing?

No. It's simply what it does.

Likewise, music is just what I do. I agree on not being attached to a particular outcome, but then again, there's nothing wrong with ambitions and goals. 

For someone who's lost in this game of life, detachment might be challenging. 

For someone else, who sees through it all rather naturally, what's challenging is full commitment and dedication to life. 

It all comes down to what's relevant.

Edited November 17, 2019 by ivankiss

[ivankiss]

Btw; thank you all for your comments. I appreciate your opinions and suggestions.

I have made the decision to fly back to Europe and find a temporary job. The idea is to work for a few months and save up a larger amount of money so I could invest more in trading. This move will eliminate all the doubt and uncertainty that has been knocking on my door lately. I am willing to work until I establish firm consistency with trading and master it fully. This will be a big relief and it will offer me a sense of security. 

Another big advantage is, that I'll be able to have access to a studio and all the necessary equipment in EU. As well as an option to collaborate with musicians/producers that I know there. 

All in one.

This new chapter will require me to be well organized, to manage my time, money and energy properly and maintain balance. It will be challenging but that's exactly what I need now. It's a big step in the right direction - that I am sure of. 

Life has just begun, indeed.

Game on.

Edited November 17, 2019 by ivankiss

[Nak Khid]

Leo, I tried