Stage Green and Finding right companionship in the society

[Annoynymous]

Hi there. I live in a third world country and mostly i consider myself a stage green person (although this is my own judgement). My country is deep stage blue, although as i live in a city, many stage blue-orange person can be found too.

Problem is i don't resonate with them. With many person i resonate partially, with many i do not resonate at all. In fact, many people in my life like that are my family members, parents and friends. As a result, in recent times i feel like isolated, alianated and frustated.

I try to avoaid them as much as i can, in many cases i cut them out from my life. But i feel lonely. I feel like people are getting out more and more and coming (whom i wish i can resonate) less and less in my life.

And another thing is, most of the time i find myself resisting blue & orange ideas in my mind and sometimes i get vocal about it and get involved in arguements. These sort of thing do not please me, but sometimes i just find myself untolerable to just listen to what they are saying (my mind says to me that they are talking rubbish)

What to do in this situation?How can i find some people who are at least on my level (stage green)? And how to handle the situation? 

Edited October 29, 2019 by Annoynymous

[mikelyons]

Set out to travel the world.
Love and be compassionate towards those around you.
Be the example, don't try to change anyone.
Live your life with passion, purpose and vision.
People may take notice and start to ask how you can be so committed to your goals, and the right people will find you. 

Watch Leo's video "How to Deal with Loneliness while Self-Actualizing" and know that loneliness is a projection of your mind. 

You are unique and different than these others for a reason, you are on the path.

Work ardently and diligently, you are bound to be successful ...

Bound to be successful.

 

(forgive my channeling Goenkaji there

[Annoynymous]

But it feels too painful to do that my friend.

I don't always feel motivated.

Sometimes i feel very vulnerable and weak.

Sometimes i feel i don't have the energy to do the work, to follow my passion. 

[Average Investor]

It's slim pickings the higher the stage. You are probably in yellow too, which is going to cause even more disconnect from others. To be honest you will start to get use to it. I feel some sadness from being alone so much, but I would much rather not be associated with any of the people I was hanging out with or dating. I removed over 10 close relationships in the last year. I talk to two people virtually occasionally that I do not see in person they live in a different state. I have one friend I go on hikes with, but with it being winter I don't anticipate to see them maybe every few months. I interact with people for business and talk to my mom pretty regularly. But that is it. 

I have people try to reach out to me regularly and I just ignore them. I only want to surround myself with positive high conscious people. Maybe I will make some more friends later on, but honestly the work and time I put into my business and myself is very rewarding. I have a habit of being friends with people who need a lot of help and me supplying that help in terms of personal development etc. 

I crave a romantic partner probably mostly from nearing a month of no fap, but even that to a degree sounds like it would take up too much time for what I want right now. Working on spirituality, personal development, health, and having a business take up my whole day. My suggestion is to start finding a purpose and keep working on yourself. You are going to die alone. And be a lone many times throughout life. So make use of it in the best way you can. 

Edited October 31, 2019 by Average Investor

[Annoynymous]

@Average Investor  Thank you for your suggestion.

At this point of my life, i am also working on my career and life purpose, so yeah, i am also busy and might prefer to be alone for a while.

But soon enough, i also want to find some people same to my level of development and have meaningful relationships.

[Average Investor]

@Annoynymous Best of luck to you! I am sure you will find others eventually. 

[Annoynymous]

No more suggestions?

[brugluiz]

7 minutes ago, Annoynymous said:

No more suggestions?

Hey, man! Just found your thread very interesting. I live in Brazil and I also find it difficult to find people I can relate with. I peg myself in Orange-Green, but if I consider I have some psychic abilities, maybe I can even peg myself in Turquoise (but it's probably a tiny Turquoise, just a taste).

I have been trying to find Green people, so I go to spiritual circles, sometimes do yoga classes and go meet some artists. Going to nightclubs haven't been working for me anymore because these kind of environments are generally very Orange and many times toxic as fuck.

Actually, I practically have no friends. Yes, I have some people I hang around and talk to, but I don't feel a deep connection. When I find good souls, I get really shy, as if I don't deserve to have so cool and nice friends. I feel I'm unworthy of having these friends. Maybe I should contact them.

[Annoynymous]

I can feel you bro... Thank you for responding @brugluiz

[Nickyy]

On 29/10/2019 at 5:57 PM, Annoynymous said:

Hi there. I live in a third world country and mostly i consider myself a stage green person (although this is my own judgement). My country is deep stage blue, although as i live in a city, many stage blue-orange person can be found too.

Problem is i don't resonate with them. With many person i resonate partially, with many i do not resonate at all. In fact, many people in my life like that are my family members, parents and friends. As a result, in recent times i feel like isolated, alianated and frustated. 

This is the time to practice unconditional acceptance. Yes they are talking "rubbish", but they cannot be any other way. It takes years to change people, and that's only even possible if they are committed to change, want to change, want to grow. So it's time to just notice that huge expectation you carry around that is causing your frustration. The situation is not causing your feelings, your feelings are there because you adopted certain values and have certain expectations that are not being met. In order to heal this you need to take responsibility for your feelings (not that you created them, but just so that you can change them) In order to become non reactive you must do the usual practice of disidentification and witnessing that will eventually allow this values system to be seen for what it is, understood that it's not serving you, and let go of and transformed into inclusiveness, compassion and unconditional love. 

After all, unconditional love is what you want from this path. Without unconditional love and acceptance as an unconscious habitual way of thinking, you cannot really be liberated from your conditioning . 

So see this time and these challenges as opportunities for your spiritual growth. That is how you should try to view everything. Other people can show you your ego and where your hidden identifications are that you cannot see yourself. Embrace this. 

On 29/10/2019 at 5:57 PM, Annoynymous said:

How can i find some people who are at least on my level (stage green)? And how to handle the situation? 

You might want to come to terms with the possibility that you may not find someone that is capable of being in a relationship with you. The best you can do is just try to learn to get your insiticual needs met in win win ways with authentic expression and then see where it takes you. 

I get the feeling that you would never put yourself in a situation that requires you to be someone you're not, so I'm pretty certain that when you get the first signal of trouble that you will be able to end any involvement with anyone you may be having regular sex with. 

Its important to not make generalisations though and come to the conclusion that there isn't anyone out there for you at all. Live with uncertainty and just try to be in the present as often as you can so that you live a life that is authentic. That will attract people to you anyway. But ultimately life doesn't owe us anything anyway, we can't expect things from life and be at peace, all we can do is continue to be ourselves more and more each day so that non attachment becomes a way of being and nothing really annoys us anymore so that we can finally just enjoy people and situations for what they are rather than what we think we need from them. 

[brugluiz]

1 hour ago, Annoynymous said:

I can feel you bro... Thank you for responding @brugluiz

You're welcome, bro

[Aquarius]

I keep thinking... if you're a real SD stage 'Green' , how come you isolate yourself and all that? I kinda know that of myself that I' kinda green-ish in the sense that, I always make people happy and try to bring positivity to the human race wherever I am with whatever I may do.

On 10/29/2019 at 7:57 PM, Annoynymous said:

And another thing is, most of the time i find myself resisting blue & orange ideas in my mind and sometimes i get vocal about it and get involved in arguements. These sort of thing do not please me, but sometimes i just find myself untolerable to just listen to what they are saying (my mind says to me that they are talking rubbish)

Define Orange and Blue "ideas" for me please... A stage green has already integrated those ideas and works with them smoothly in order to create something with said persons. For example I consider myself being between green and yellow, and mom being hardcore blue our conversations have a block after a while, a significant while though, which is transformative.

Be the change you wanna see in the world much??

Respect everyone peace love everybodaaaaaay?????

According to this image above you are supposed to view people as equals if you are SD 'Green'. Sharing things with persons you love, having a sense of community are at your core when you are a Green. 

 

For me what you describes sounds like you have to work on yourself, you're going through stuff and all, you're growing. You seem to value growth and social interaction, which are High Orange / Low Green traits. If I had to give you advice, I'd say to make peace with yourself and the people in your life. Don't just be a 'me vs them' thinker.  

[Average Investor]

@Aquarius You would start to isolate more in stage yellow as green is much larger on the collective and group thinking. But everyone is different. So while you are transitioning more into yellow you might feel this shift. You are not really going to enjoy most of the stuff you would find in the lower stages, but that isn't to say all of it won't be enjoyable. Especially moving up the spiral you are likely going to have a lot less habits as you will become more fulfilled. So will you probably won't find yourself hanging out with people who drink and do other vices all the time. 

Edited November 2, 2019 by Average Investor

[Annoynymous]

8 hours ago, Nickyy said:

This is the time to practice unconditional acceptance. Yes they are talking "rubbish", but they cannot be any other way. It takes years to change people, and that's only even possible if they are committed to change, want to change, want to grow. So it's time to just notice that huge expectation you carry around that is causing your frustration. The situation is not causing your feelings, your feelings are there because you adopted certain values and have certain expectations that are not being met. In order to heal this you need to take responsibility for your feelings (not that you created them, but just so that you can change them) In order to become non reactive you must do the usual practice of disidentification and witnessing that will eventually allow this values system to be seen for what it is, understood that it's not serving you, and let go of and transformed into inclusiveness, compassion and unconditional love. 

After all, unconditional love is what you want from this path. Without unconditional love and acceptance as an unconscious habitual way of thinking, you cannot really be liberated from your conditioning . 

So see this time and these challenges as opportunities for your spiritual growth. That is how you should try to view everything. Other people can show you your ego and where your hidden identifications are that you cannot see yourself. Embrace this. 

You might want to come to terms with the possibility that you may not find someone that is capable of being in a relationship with you. The best you can do is just try to learn to get your insiticual needs met in win win ways with authentic expression and then see where it takes you. 

I get the feeling that you would never put yourself in a situation that requires you to be someone you're not, so I'm pretty certain that when you get the first signal of trouble that you will be able to end any involvement with anyone you may be having regular sex with. 

Its important to not make generalisations though and come to the conclusion that there isn't anyone out there for you at all. Live with uncertainty and just try to be in the present as often as you can so that you live a life that is authentic. That will attract people to you anyway. But ultimately life doesn't owe us anything anyway, we can't expect things from life and be at peace, all we can do is continue to be ourselves more and more each day so that non attachment becomes a way of being and nothing really annoys us anymore so that we can finally just enjoy people and situations for what they are rather than what we think we need from them. 

Well yeah, maybe i will leave the person whom i i would feel i don't get along even if i am having regular sex with her.but in first signal? I really doubt that.

As i said, my country is deep blue. Relationships are also conservative type, and in this scenario if  it is my married wife then it is more difficult to leave her. 

People don't view divorce positively here.

Thinking about this and other so called restrictions of my society makes me feel sick.

It feels like one way door to hell. You can enter the hell, but you can not exit.    

Disidentification may work. But that would take a lot of work. It is not easy to embody also.

[Nickyy]

@Annoynymous No it not easy, you're right about that. But you're disidentifying now by talking about it. 

You said it yourself that thinking about the restrictions of society makes you feel sick. So what would happen if you understood that it's your expectation that is causing you to feel sick rather than the outer circumstances? 

You have a choice here, you can be the victim of circumstances and continue to feel bad, or you can develop out of the very mentality you see in society?

Can you admit that being the victim is a blue thought? 

[Annoynymous]

8 hours ago, Aquarius said:

I keep thinking... if you're a real SD stage 'Green' , how come you isolate yourself and all that? I kinda know that of myself that I' kinda green-ish in the sense that, I always make people happy and try to bring positivity to the human race wherever I am with whatever I may do.

Define Orange and Blue "ideas" for me please... A stage green has already integrated those ideas and works with them smoothly in order to create something with said persons. For example I consider myself being between green and yellow, and mom being hardcore blue our conversations have a block after a while, a significant while though, which is transformative.

Be the change you wanna see in the world much??

Respect everyone peace love everybodaaaaaay?????

According to this image above you are supposed to view people as equals if you are SD 'Green'. Sharing things with persons you love, having a sense of community are at your core when you are a Green. 

 

For me what you describes sounds like you have to work on yourself, you're going through stuff and all, you're growing. You seem to value growth and social interaction, which are High Orange / Low Green traits. If I had to give you advice, I'd say to make peace with yourself and the people in your life. Don't just be a 'me vs them' thinker.  

Well honestly, i don't consider myself solid green. I have some orange aspects too.

But you missed my point. "Live and let live" is my motto and i don't have any problem with other blue and orange people doing whatever they want. In fact, this post is not about them! It is about me.

I am trying to find likewise people, that is it. I think green hippies find companionship among hippis, not among some priests who blindly follows christianity. A green person won't mind the priest being in his way but at the same time, he/she won't make him their "hang around buddy". That is pretty obvious.

And i would like to consider this : green is peace loving and it has love for the nature. Now, if a green person see women right is violated,  they are frequently eve teased/raped and some people are justifying it by saying things like " women who wear revealing dresses and goes out night deserve it", would you, as a green person just say,  it is allright and do let them what they do?

I don't thing so, because as a green, you are there for equality and you believe in social justice.

And being the change what i want doesn't mean everything will happen smoothly. Violence happens for a reason. You can not just sit around and be the change and expect everyone around you will change accordingly. 

And i worked out my previous blue values and most of orange values so i can see from where they are coming. But still, that does not mean as a green person, i can not get angry and frustrated some times. 

Edited November 2, 2019 by Annoynymous

[Nickyy]

@Annoynymous btw, Im not saying you're completely blue, but I'm just saying you have a bit of unhealthy blue in you that you aren't conscious of yet. We all have these uneven developmental issues. Me too

Edited November 2, 2019 by Nickyy

[Annoynymous]

@Nickyy yeah, it can be the case....

[Annoynymous]

1 hour ago, Nickyy said:

@Annoynymous No it not easy, you're right about that. But you're disidentifying now by talking about it. 

You said it yourself that thinking about the restrictions of society makes you feel sick. So what would happen if you understood that it's your expectation that is causing you to feel sick rather than the outer circumstances? 

You have a choice here, you can be the victim of circumstances and continue to feel bad, or you can develop out of the very mentality you see in society?

Can you admit that being the victim is a blue thought? 

Well i can see the point you are making, and you are right. Although i am not sure if being the victim is a blue thought or not.

It doesn't matter. Anyway i  am perpetuating the victim mentality. But how to change that? by changing environment? Or circumstances?

I am not so sure about it....

[Aeris]

On 29/10/2019 at 6:57 PM, Annoynymous said:

Hi there. I live in a third world country and mostly i consider myself a stage green person (although this is my own judgement). My country is deep stage blue, although as i live in a city, many stage blue-orange person can be found too.

Problem is i don't resonate with them. With many person i resonate partially, with many i do not resonate at all. In fact, many people in my life like that are my family members, parents and friends. As a result, in recent times i feel like isolated, alianated and frustated.

I try to avoaid them as much as i can, in many cases i cut them out from my life. But i feel lonely. I feel like people are getting out more and more and coming (whom i wish i can resonate) less and less in my life.

And another thing is, most of the time i find myself resisting blue & orange ideas in my mind and sometimes i get vocal about it and get involved in arguements. These sort of thing do not please me, but sometimes i just find myself untolerable to just listen to what they are saying (my mind says to me that they are talking rubbish)

What to do in this situation?How can i find some people who are at least on my level (stage green)? And how to handle the situation? 

Follow the weed and the music