The ego turns into a volcanic LAVA when he thinks he is less loved than others

[Nivsch]

I felt it strongly yesterday.

When i felt less loved (relative to others) by people in a group, ESPECIALLY when it comes from people I very like and appreciate, and I think they like me less than they like others (true or not, this is what I felt at that moment).

Than the ego turn into a lava spread out from a volcano. You are like 99% the red vMeme, and I admit that in that moments, I really dont care if people in the group will smoke the particles from this lava. Until I will return to feel liked! Until than - i really dont fucking care.

The whole truth from my eyes in that moment is the importance for me to feel liked again by the people i like. Selfish or not, for the ego this is the most right thing in the world.

Of course i do the steps strategicaly (thats why its 99% red but 1% orange;)) and show them diplomaticaly and in a good way, that they were wrong.

The whole "tribe" is containing 60 people and those 3 that i talked about last post (but one of them i really like and therfore got hurt) are also members of the major whatsapp group (of 60).

Edited October 18, 2019 by Nivsch

[hamedsf]

HEY BRO! HOW ARE YOU DOIN'?
I know that your feelings are not right currently or maybe they weren't right but now it has passed completely and you've got over it! it doesn't matter at all what you feel right now, I'm gonna point out a few tips about the EGO mind and its role of controlling the emotion: 
whoever has bothered or hurt your feelings and you are feeling triggered about the specific situation like what's app group/clique, that doesn't matter too. right now or at the time of the post, you were feeling down because you were over-moralizing the specific situation and you wanted that group or situation to be this way but turned out the other way and you don't understand why it happens.
oftentimes, when our EGO gets hurt significantly, its role is that it blows one scenario out of proportion (making it larger than it appears) like a convex mirror! for example: when a girl fall out of love with you, you feel so down that you feel that the whole world has fallen out of love with you, from this breakup onward, not any type of girl will fall in love with you ever again, and it feels damn right but after a short or long while, the opposite scenario gets proven to you and another girl comes in your way and falls in love with you again. see? our EGO made it larger and larger but all of its analysis got thrown out the window when the right time arrived.  I know your case is not about the relationship or something in those lines but I brought up an example for you to understand what I say!
so be aware that your EGO will try to these things in the meantime:
1- blowing things out of proportion (making it larger than it is actually)
2- holding a grudge towards specific people who didn't behave the way you thought that they could be doing
3- over-moralizing the situation 
and so on...
and please instead of reiterating through the scenario over and over again in your head, please go and discuss and express your feelings to your close friends and see what their reasonings are! and afterward, if you would think that they're beating around the bush and not bringing up the reasonable and plausible points then what I recommend you to do ultimately is to use the power of "letting go" in case if you needed to move on! 

Edited October 18, 2019 by hamedsf

[Aeris]

 

[Nivsch]

@hamedsf thanks man. I like your answers as always. Very appreciate it. I talked to them and show them what i felt. I really dont know why he didnt defend me. It something i cant umderstand because for me is very automatic to defend something (especially if is a friend of mine) that other people are talking behind his back. But at least i talked to him and showed him exactly what i felt and why.

[Nivsch]

On 18.10.2019 at 5:10 PM, Aeris said:

 

Something like this yes

[CreamCat]

1. Acceptance
   • Accept that they do not love you in the ways you like them to.
   • Accept that you felt hurt about it.
2. Assessment and awareness
   • Recognize how you are screwing your relationships.
3. Take responsibility for your relationships.
   • Make it so that you are respected and heard.

This is a hard work that can take a lifetime.

Edited October 21, 2019 by CreamCat