Spiritual Bucket List This Week - My Spiritual Life

[Preety_India]

A general summary of qualities 

???Catergorywise or by Role

?Championship qualities 

?Masonic qualities 

?Supplementary qualities 

???Aspect-wise or by aesthetic nature 

?Superlative 

?Sublime

?Transcendent

??? Qualities of an archon 

???Qualities of a master 

??? Qualities of a mentee

???Qualities of a champion 

???Qualities of a seer 

 

Short note - 

The archon is more about raw desirability and raw qualities. The master is more like a genius and shows more Masonic qualities combined with qualities of the archon. The mentee is a learner but is very devoted and exceptional at absorbing and observing the qualities and paths of other people and using their examples and inspiration to apply and use in his life and is still learning and is not mastered yet. He creates his life path and purpose by taking inspiration from the masters and archons. He is like an artist. He creates his own salad and infuses whatever he learns along the way and incorporates the better things into his life. 

The champion is inspiring through his devotion and dedication to his role. He is similar to the mentee but he is above his league because he has learned a lot more than the mentee and is very close to being a master. He may not be excellent but he has left a legacy. His body of work and commitment ethic is laudable. 

The seer is more spiritual and emotional and is more deep and very intuitive and Sublime and very understanding and calm and very Empathetic 

Edited November 9, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

I want to use animal representations for these characters. These are tarots. 

Like lotus for seer

Ahmm. 

Horse for champion

 Wolf or archer for archon 

 Jackal for a master 

Tree for mentee

            

Edited November 9, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Psychopathy and intelligence are correlated

 

 

[Preety_India]

Bleh... 

.. 

 

 

 

Edited November 9, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Better learn than suffer 

Empathetic intelligence - is wanting everyone to be happy and welfare for everyone and devising strategies for that. 

 

Psychopathic intelligence - intelligence used for maximum personal advantage at the expense of others. 

[Preety_India]

Reminder to myself - don't fall off the wagon again 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Diagram for understanding characters and qualities 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Hehehe this is how my ex boyfriend used to ask me for money.

 

[Preety_India]

I love these hairstyles. Bleh 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited November 9, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Elements of life 

• Health 
• Education, talent, skill. 
• Development and preservation of ecosystem 
• Spiritual development and connection with God. 
• Work/passion/ occupation 
• Development of community and preservation of tradition
• Protection of community 
• Helping the unfortunate 
• Family creation
• Family development and children 
• Hobbies and fun
• Entertainment
• Emotional health 
• Healing 
• Developing essential skills and qualities 

 

 

Edited November 9, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

I'm going to discuss about another aspect of humility in terms of primal existence. Like we have to be humble because we cannot attain ultimate spirituality yet we can be good human beings. Somewhere there is this feeling that too much spirituality could be new age hypocrisy and self deception. 

I'm going to touch on this subject at some point but I'll leave it for now. 

It's more about your primal nature and being accepting and happy with it rather than resisting it. Embracing your primal nature rather than thinking that only spirituality will complete you. 

Edited November 9, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

This insight came to me during this morning meditation today and it was very wonderful. 

It was like this. 

Like a protective instinct that follows you everywhere. That's God's power. It's like a cement or a fixative that covers you like an aura and protects not only your home but wherever you go in this world and touches every aspect of your life and makes it wonderful. 

It makes it beautiful. 

It releases the toxins around you and protects you from destructive events or forces or things. It helps you, energizes you and helps you heal and helps you grow and find a peaceful grounding to live and flourish on. It brings good people in your life. It creates a sacred comfort in your life. 

It's like a glue

 

 

 

Edited November 9, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Certain things just fall in the category of odd things whether they are material or spiritual. 

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

I had been thinking about spirituality for some time and certain things have changed. 

I started thinking about ancient cultures a week ago and even had a new journal on that. But it has changed my perspective. I no longer think that only spirituality is important. 

I have begun to believe that sometimes spirituality comes from an unconscious denial although I'm not rejecting spirituality altogether and I know that spirituality is like an ocean and there's just too much to study in it. 

 

The more I started to dig into ancient Roman and Greek culture the more I learned that materialism is also something. That denial of it is unnecessary. And that spirituality does not cover every aspect of life. 

The most important revelation was that there is definitely a primal side to evil but also a sociopathic side to evil. The primal side can be accepted and while doing so we sort of have to compromise with Spirituality. That was a bit difficult. Now I am not trying to accomodate my primal aspect and dashing spirituality away for protecting my primal needs. Like an abuser would provide rationale for his abuse. But I do it because I have realized that even through materialism one can have a spiritual experience. 

 

This came from last week's deep deep overwhelming extremely pleasuring sexual experience. With that experience came a strong feeling of love. And it almost felt like a higher love. It felt like a wonderful feeling of happiness and I felt like I was truly truly loved. Truly loved. The person made me very happy and very loved. It not only felt sexual but at the same time it felt spiritual. It felt like pure love. Up until this point I never felt like I would ever consider a sexual experience to be anything more than sexual. I never thought of sexual experiences that way. 

But the sexual experience I had this time was very wonderful. It opened the door to love. There was a lot of sexual affection. Deep sexual affection. 

And it felt wonderful. The affection was very strong. That's why I felt it was almost spiritual. 

The next day I felt that even biological experiences can lead to profound spiritual feelings   and it need not be sitting in a cave meditating. 

I wrote about it. Very recently. 

Thats where the mask began to fall off. And I started to realize that everything physical is not non spiritual. And this was a huge breakthrough. Combined with the influence of ancient Greek and Roman culture, it had a tremendous impact on my thinking and beliefs. 

The other part that influenced my thinking was that I watched a lot of stuff that happened to people that was sociopathic and a question came to my mind - "what's the cure for this sociopath?"..... And I realized that there is no cure except putting down the rabid dog. Spirituality cannot change it. Spirituality does not have a solution for sociopathy. A sociopath doesn't change they are just born that way. So I figured that there is an obvious physical side to things that cannot be ignored. So I had to think more realistically. 

I think without sex this revelation wouldn't have been possible. It's only through sex that I saw a connection between physical and spiritual. But not any sex. Only that particular sex where you really feel loved. Sex that does not make you feel loved is really very mechanical and does not have that love aspect to it. You feel like you are giving a performance that's all. It can even feel a little odd. 

But this wasn't like that. This was something like never before. I felt very loved and cared for and very respected and very wanted. It was amazing. 

That's when I realized that physical is just as important as spiritual and that it shouldn't be neglected. 

And there is a ethereal beauty to physical things. 

I used to think that it's the physical part that complements the spiritual part. 

The sexual experience last week healed me, it brought me to tears and also made me realize how much my ex hated me, like how he didn't love me enough, didn't make me feel deserved, and would say terrible sexual things to me on top of all the lack of affection. 

I have realized that for a woman a sexual experience is very important because she feels loved. 

Now I think opposite... 

I think it's the spiritual part that complements the physical part. Spiritual is necessary when the physical is absent. 

I think part of the reason why I focused so much on spiritual is because I only thought life after death and eternity. But didn't realize that I should also focus about life before I think about death. 

Death and eternity are far away. And who's to say what happens after death. That only death will know. Why to think about death when you are alive. How is thinking about death going to benefit life. Why not be real. Why be in denial. And the biggest thing is when you die, how does anything even matter. You are dead. It's over. It's gone. Whatever spirituality you hold to be true is non existent or at least non meaningful or defunct at that point. You are gone. All experience is gone. Even if you have a spiritual experience after death, your body is not alive to experience or feel it. So the present state of awareness and emotion matters more than whatever happens after death. 

 

This single most important insight was only possible because of sex. And I had no idea that sex would have such a tremendous impact on me. 

 

Reality is what you feel now. 

Reality is your emotions. Your emotions through life. Your experiences. Reality is your purpose and your fulfillment in this life. Reality is your psycho-emotional-mental state right now. That's what matters. Your past is gone and you cannot change it. Whatever you can change is the future. And the future depends on what you create now.. Reality is based on all this... 

You need to feel good. You need to feel good now to feel better in eternity. Sex can make you feel good. It's primal

 I never looked at spirituality with this very primal perspective. But I see it now. And it feels very different. 

 

Edited November 9, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

He is all about convenience and greed. Convenient morality 

 

 

Extremely self serving 

Edited November 10, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

I just needed love and acceptance in life. 

 

I have come to realize that that's all I needed. That will set me free. 

 

I have understood that the root cause of evil is abuse. Lying, stealing, cheating, craving, everything comes from a relationship of fear, demonization,deprivation, dismissal, judgement, violence, abuse, punishment, threats, humiliation, shaming etc.. A good person becomes bad when they are exposed to fear. 

God protect me from evil and sin

 

Weird and neurotic behaviors are also a result of narcissistic abuse

The weird behavior was a coping mechanism to the narcissistic abuse. 

I want to talk about this emptiness syndrome. A psychological dissonance. 

Like if I come back from work, I don't feel happy at all, I feel very empty, like there is nothing fulfilling about success, money, power, status, fame like these are just artificial elements inserted into the life that don't make it full. It's a spiritual emptiness. You feel like these are not relevant. And on top of it, you feel like they are a waste of time, and also a distraction to your spiritual objective and therefore you feel like you are constantly missing out on something while you are in that rat race and while you are in it, the frustration only grows. 

 

We all have a child within us that wants to be free, wants to experience Bliss, some candy, we all want that freedom, that purity, that innocence that liberation and unconditional comforting love. That peace that acceptance. 

 

I'm looking for the following things 

?Happiness

?Healing

?Security 

?Peace 

?Unconditional love 

?Acceptance 

?Fulfillment and purpose 

?Comfortable growing space and not a toxic space 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I was thinking about the next concept which is the most important thing to me. This concept is about life. 

It's about how there are major complexes that are important to be considered. 

One thing I noted is that life is the experience of both physical and spiritual. 

After death spiritual is not relevant and physical does not exist. So only life is important. 

In life its the Fusion of both physical and spiritual and this is the only chance to experience it. 

The complexes are 

Socio-psycho-biology complex

Psycho-biology complex

Psycho-emotional-mental-spiritual complex 

Psycho-emotional-mental complex

I will call these energy molecules or energy pathways. 

Development of all these complex or pathways is important. 

Now the spirit has a disposition but this disposition is also impacted by the Psycho-emotional-mental complex. 

Now life consists of aspects

The psycho-biological and the emotional-mental-biological and psycho-emotional-mental-spiritual complex and Socio-psycho-biology complex. And psycho-emotional-mental aspect. 

In spiritual there are 2

psycho-emotional-mental-spiritual complex

psycho-emotional-mental complex

In physical there are 3

psycho-biological complex 

Socio-psycho-biology complex

emotional-mental-biological complex 

 

If you don't water a plant then the plant will die. Therefore only spiritual aspect is not the only important aspect, it's also the physical or biological aspect that should be considered. 

But if you forget the spiritual aspect there are problems like depression and mental illness and degradation of the spirit. 

Therefore both need to be considered. 

 

You have a physical journey as well as a spiritual journey. 

The term engineering. This term has a special meaning. Every word, statement, action you make or do should be engineered lifeward. 

 

Different types of abuse

Mental - cursing, name calling 

Emotional - mocking at emotions, passive aggressive tactics 

Physical - violence and slaving many hours

Psychological - changing their natural perception about something by gaslighting. Like telling a wife that cheating is okay and she shouldn't bother

Spiritual - making a person believe they wil go to hell if they didn't do so and so. Extortion. Making a person do evil or encouraging a person to be evil. Provoking a person to evil

Edited November 11, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

After laying out a plan for both physical and spiritual growth, the most important element is "FOCUS" 

 

Just pay attention to what needs to be done to fix things and what needs to be done next to create a flow, a pattern or a sequence or an order 

Edited November 11, 2019 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Another thing is to not get overwhelmed by duties and responsibilities and distractions and "things that need fixing".... 

Those can be put off for later. Focus on what's more important right now. Or at least what's important for this week or next week.. 

[Preety_India]

I want to feel more confident and responsible from now on. I have a lot to work on. 

Today is the start. 

I need to keep the date in mind. November 11

[Preety_India]

I'm planning to make my own focus cards