Clearing Out

[mandyjw]

Stay or leave. Together, to go there.

What does Abraham Hicks actually teach? How to TRULY not "have" desires!!! 

From the Tao Te Ching,

3. Always without desire we must be found,
If its deep mystery we would sound;
But if desire always within us be,
Its outer fringe is all that we shall see.

The work is done, but how no one can see;
'Tis this that makes the power not cease to be.

[mandyjw]

I bought Abraham Hick's money and attraction cards a couple months ago. They are helpful for unwiring yucky thoughts and beliefs about money. I really want to unwire beliefs about the subject of money and feel like it's similar to the sexual repression issue, I like to pass off the issue of money as stupid and irrelevant and "I'm above that, because money isn't important" BUT, as I've discovered, one subject is never just one subject. Repression is repression. I am not a material girl, but I am a material girl. 

I feel like if I spend money, I need to have had a windfall to feel good about it or that I'll have to work harder later on to justify it. I believe that I need to control money by thinking a lot about it and a lot of those thoughts don't feel great. 

It's really, really strikingly beautiful right now, and while I was driving and appreciating it I thought of this. The present is a gift, a present, (haha) already always, but it's up to us to accept it. A lot of our thoughts are so inappropriate it's as if your child gave you a sculpture they worked on for hours, and without saying a word or skipping a beat, you pull out a knife and violently chop it to bits. You separate perfection into bits so you can reject parts of it, in your ignorance that it was indeed, already perfect to begin with.  

Edited February 8, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

There is not Abraham Hick's way, or Leo's way or Bashar's way, Eckhart Tolle's way, Ramana Maharshi's, Lao Tzu's way. There are no conflicts. They are all aspects of yourself that only come together as integration within/without you. You'll attract just what you need when you need it. 

Ooof. I just had an idea/inspiration towards integrating my business and spirituality, and realized it's been a dream of mine for a long time... from the beginning. The moon is stunning tonight. 

 

[mandyjw]

I saw an image/narrative during meditation of my heart. It's a cave of jewels/or a single jewel and there's a really pissed off little dragon laying claim to it and guarding it. 

A couple of nights ago I pulled the 10 of swords tarot card and had an insight about how dramatic I tend to be. We know and are shamed for causing drama or acting dramatic in real life but the ego is the drama behind it's own shaming of drama. It's the internal self created drama in thinking.

My parents got an ice storm and the trees are stunning, the sunlight reflecting off all the branches like diamonds. I had an insight to walk out back and the sun was in the direction, shining through the trees where I had my first insight that "I am light" when I first sat to meditate. 

Last night I watched an interview with the guy who channels Bashar. I got annoyed, (judgmental thoughts) about his own projects of movie making in the beginning and stopped watching it. I had an impulse/message to go back to it. Then another to skip to 44 minutes in. What he said then was fascinating. Indra's net stuck with me. 

"In the heaven of Indra, there is said to be a network of pearls, so arranged that if you look at one, you see all the other reflected in it." -The Rig Veda

  I was reading and envisioning Indra's net last night. I deeply love symbols. It's basically a spider web with water drops on it. Nahm's avatar of the leaf and water droplets comes to mind, and his pointer of why bubbles end up always being round, or water or stars, or planets, etc.

I mentored a 10 year old girl last week as part of a project with her school, and during a demo was going to explain to her how glass turns round when melted and but a second before I could say it she noticed herself and exclaimed over it.  I randomly made her a yellow flower without thought and noticed this morning in my bright yellow hallway (which I love now by the way) with the dreamboard the book "The Secret of the Golden Flower" and made the connection between yellow and gold, which I recently moved in there. 

 I bought a shampoo that has a green apple and a leaf on it, ran out of my old shampoo and put it in the shower a couple days ago. In the shower the water beaded on the bottle over the leaf to look just like Nahm's profile image.

The symbolism of roots, or a tree branches, fractaled, mirrored circularly, like a kaleidoscope, would create a net.

During meditation I had a vision of these water droplets, in Indra's net with faces in them and made the connection of how we truly reflect each other. 

symbolism, symbiosis 

"The English prefixes syn- along with its variant sym-, derived from Greek, mean “together.” You can remember syn- easily by thinking of synonym, which is a word that goes “together” with another word because it has a similar meaning."

synonym, synchronicity. Funny that it sounds like "sin"  My friend's married name has "sin" in it, she's the one who I read the Empowered wife book for that helped me breakthrough. Her married name has always been very striking and funny to me, especially considering our shared Christian upbringing. 

I just had a memory of a Japanese missionary coming to the church when I was very young. We were supposed to pronounce a the Japanese word for sin word properly, with the t mostly silent, and there was a lot of laughter and hilarity. What is the Japanese word for sin? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tsumi

Does the dragon guard its Easter eggs like jewels? Or does it know that it only serves to hide their light when it believes it owns them.  

SY- Sincerely Yours 

I hadn't written the word "sincerely" in such a long time until I had to write letters for the mentor program. 

 

 

 

Edited February 9, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

Oh my God, and with that, I have gone too far down the (possum) rabbit hole. 

So much synchronicity,

Sincerely yours, 

signing off now.

Pray for me. Pray? P ray like a ray of light, a ray of sun. Oh, when will it stop? 

Edited February 9, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

Sia -Unstoppable 

AH!!!!!! 

[mandyjw]

666

Six Six Six

See, SEE, see??? 

Sight

Edited February 9, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

Psyche 

Psychology

Sigmund Freud

Systems.

Synergy

Simple, single, singularity, sign

"Sirius is the brightest star in the night sky. Its name is derived from the Greek word Σείριος Seirios "glowing" or "scorching". 

Sigh... I really need to get off my ass and go buy some fucking groceries now. 

Si reversed? Is 

Edited February 9, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

History and Etymology for Sierra

Spanish, literally, saw, from Latin serra

Saw as in a mountain chain going up and down, like the teeth of a saw. The double meaning of saw/saw,

"Que sera, sera" 'whatever will be, will be'.

[mandyjw]

That was it! The word last night that came to me and kept going through my head over and over again. I was so frustrated, I forgot it and couldn't think of it to journal about it. 

BE - come.

BE COME

Beacon

“Come, come, whoever you are, wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving, it doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vow a hundred times."- Rumi

Beacon, light worker, the new logo, the mountain, the light, the Sierra Nevada (Sierra means saw), Leo is from Nevada, what does Nevada mean? Snow. What is Leo's signature quote? "Be melting snow, wash yourself of yourself." =Rumi 

Rumi- ruminate. 

"ru·mi·nate

/ˈro͞oməˌnāt/

verb 1.think deeply about something.

"we sat ruminating on the nature of existence"

sit

 

 

 

 

Edited February 9, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

"Meanings and history of the name Sia

Swedish name derived from the Old Norse sigr, meaning "victory."
Scottish Gaelic vocabulary word meaning "six."
Pronounced: SEE-uh
Sia, sjA (transliteration sjA)in the ancient Egypt was the god of wisdom and knowledge, residing in the heart.
----
-Indian goddess Sita feminine virtues: dedication, self-sacrifice, courage, purity
-Hebrew: helper
-Old Norse "sigr" -> Swedish: victory'
-Scottish: six
-Arabic name Zia: 'light, splendour or glow';
-Swedish: prophesy
-Persian: one who brings joy'
-Greek (Athanasia): immortal, resurrection
-Biblical/ Hebrew (Sia also Siaha) council, congregation, to converse"

[mandyjw]

Secret, seven, seals

See, see, see?

[mandyjw]

The lion IS the lamb.

My son asked about the person to make youtube. Did google? What the first video ever recorded to youtube?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Me_at_the_zoo  Elephants. "The elephants have really, really, really long trunks. And that's pretty much all there is to say." 

"In Buddhism, the elephant is seen as an earthly manifestation of the qualities embodied in the Buddha himself."

"Just as the elephant’s trunk which is otherwise restless, will become steady if it is made to hold an iron chain, so that the elephant goes its way without reaching out for any other object, so also the ever-restless mind, which is trained and accustomed to a name or form through meditation or invocation, will steadily hold on to that alone." - Ramana Maharshi 

But, the elephants have really, really long trunks though Ramana. It must be lucky, to have Ram in your name. 

 

 

[mandyjw]

Due, do, duty, duality, dew, dew in the garden of eden, drops of dew, Indra's net. Deduce. 

Edited February 9, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

Silence, sing, symphony, psycheldeic, psilocybin 

Meditation, medium, medical, medicine. "The Latin root word medi means “middle.”

Went to get groceries checked out and my cashier's name was Hannah (quintessential palindrome name) and the girl behind me was buying a stuffed animal horse from the show, named Spirit. On the way back I exclaimed to my daughter how BEAUTIFUL the ice was and immediately a car with the vanity plate Beau drove by. Be you tiful.  Then I made the connection between bearing and baring. And I saw in a glistening field of ice on the way home, a horse. 

As the day has progressed I have become more and more aware that this virus I have is really affecting my head. It's like I'm in limbo, in the connected state of my brain when I sleep. Is this only entertaining in my head? Emphatic YES? Does this sound insane? in sane? Care killed the cat. Seal says... "No we're never gonna survive, unless We are a little Crazy"

crazy indeed all rivers flow surely to the sea 

Take my whole life too.

 

 

Edited February 9, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

Indra's net

[mandyjw]

Ramana, Ram, Ra, God of the sun, ray, radio, reiki = ray-key 

Bahahahaha, or should I say Rahahahaha?

 

Edited February 9, 2020 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

"The lowercase letter psi (ψ) indicates the wave function in quantum mechanics and electric flux in electrical engineering."

I don't know if I have an extreme case of monkey mind or if it's burning up. Or both. 

[mandyjw]

I just asked my husband if my insane word linking made sense, he said no. I was already feeling very lacking in self love and suggested that maybe he just can't see the connections, something like that. Care killed the cat? Fail. Looked up apophenia and went down that judgement self-diagnosis rabbit hole for a while. CraAAAZY. My husband left to get supper and said there was a synchronicity there, the song I was talking about "Blinding Lights" by The Weeknd was playing there. We were talking about it a few days ago, he said he had a song from Final Fantasy named Blinded by Light. 

2 hours ago, mandyjw said:

I don't know if I have an extreme case of monkey mind or if it's burning up. Or both. 

In my last youtube video I had an impulse to wear an orange glass pyramid necklace. Strange because I already dressed in green, and ended up changing. I had an impulse to wear it again today. The sy synchronicity reminded me of Truth Addict in Syria and I messaged him to ask him how he is. He replied and complemented me on my videos, and said I looked like a real witch with the necklace and orange in the latest one. 

Right before I had my daughter, a glass artist I had really admired randomly listed that orange pyramid for sale after going years without listing a single thing. The artist's name, and the piece is signed, Randall Burnett. It was right after my realization that "I am light" when I sat to meditate. The thing just glows with light. At the time pyramids meant nothing to me. I felt such a connection to it, I bought it. I never wore it at all until last year. Later thought that I shouldn't have because I was trying to be good with money but didn't have good judgement because I was about to pop.  (Strange changes in the brain occur right before you give birth, hormones, etc.) 

In FACT, here's the embarrassing moment that happened before I had my son. I was driving home from a doctor's appointment and had been driving for an hour and half and was very tired, I was right about to pop. It was night and I had a new car and wasn't yet familiar with the dash lights. I came up behind a car and forgot to turn my high beams off. I drove behind him a while until he pulled over. I went by and noticed what I'd done, that I had blinded him with my lights and felt awful. He got directly behind me, and turned his high beams on and rode there to do the same to me. I was scared and I also felt awful, and hurt. He had no idea I was tired, pregnant and in an unfamiliar car. Even 9 months pregnant, I had a lot of pride at the time, so I drove extremely fast until he gave it up. 

pyre, fire, pyramid, py ra mid, peeramid peer amid  The eye on the pyramid on our money? Hello? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eye_of_Providence

peer, peer double meaning, "look keenly or with difficulty at someone or something."

OR "a person of the same age, status, or ability as another specified person."

SEE? We are all reflected in one another. I want to cry. Look at the picture on the song, Indra's net, the lights reflected in his sun glasses. 

Sitting here staring and my husband asks, "did you call my name?" No. I did not. 

"Call out my name..." I guess the weekend is over. 

 

Edited February 10, 2020 by mandyjw

[SilentTears]

4 hours ago, mandyjw said:

In my last youtube video I had an impulse to wear an orange glass pyramid necklace.

How interesting, when I watched your video this necklace really stood out to me and I sat there debating if I should comment on how lovely it looked. 

It’s nice to see how everything connects