Share your worsts moments

[Raphael]

Share your worst moments here, it can be anything that had some impact on you: moments where you felt humiliated, shameful, angry, very uncomfortable, unfair situation, fearful moments, etc. Of course, some of these moments can have a positive impact on the long term, but experiencing them doesn't feel good. Try to be as honest as possible.

I'm going to start by sharing some of mine here, some of them go back to my childhood, some of them are more recent.

Some moments where I was a kid:

• When my dad gave me a huge slap because I accidentally bump into him. He told me that I was in his way
• When my dad started to spank me over and over because I accidentally pressed a tube of shaving foam and dropped its content on the floor
• When my dad throws a knife at my mother after an excess of rage. Fortunately, he missed it and she was not hurt
• When I was 12 years old, I got severely morally bullied at school. A few minutes after getting back into class I started crying so much that my teacher wanted to know who did this. I told her it was some kids in another class and she had the idea to bring me to their classroom to publicly show to everyone what they did to me. I felt extremely humiliated at this moment

Some more recent moments:

• When I was studying at university and I realized that my desire to become rich, famous, and powerful was completely egoistical and was filled by my need to take my revenge on life and dominate all the people who treat me badly in the past. My entire world collapsed at this moment
• When I got back from Europe to my native country and saw my dad after more than two years and he treats me as the same little kid than before. He was literally thinking that someone was preparing my food, where I was all by myself. Several weeks later he told that if I would not be able to sustain myself if I were alone because I didn't want to listen to his outdated advice, where this is exactly what I did for two years. This got me very angry
• After getting back to my native country, I realized how rigid and backward minded people are there, they get angry so easily when I contradict their opinions, are very reactive to differences, and live with fear. I also got treated like a foreigner because I didn't speak fluently the local language and got scammed because of my physical appearance, where I lived in this country almost all my life
• In 2018, I was so angry and fearful of my dad and society that I started to had panic attacks. Those were the most terrifying experiences I had until now

Share your owns here!

Edited September 30, 2019 by Raphael