Why does my friend try to bring me down?

[Ibn Sina]

So I have this friend, who previously was very nice to me. He used to be a very non-aggressive, naive , shy type of guy. I used to admire him a lot and even made it clear when I wished him Happy birthday in a great manner in facebook that got 6 wow reacts  in a row from my friends.

A few days ago, he and I suddenly met. Then we had a chat. But the chat turned into a conversation where innocently it looked like I was all bragging about myself and became a very a high status person.

It was like this- (  All that I have said is true. He asked questions, and I gave the answer. But those answers weren't to put myself on a high stature)

He asked about my brother. So , I said he was a doctor, he earns a good amount of money.
We also talked about me being an author, who has sold his many novels.
We also talked about the new book that I am writing.
We also talked about my 'hit' comments on twitter and facebook that often gets 1000 to 2000 likes.
We also talked about my brother having 3000 followers in twitter.
I told him- you should also engage  in something else then medicine.
He also has lesser height then me, and probably doesn't look as good as I do (probably)
Also, I have flings with the prettiest girls with our class, which he hasn't and he is seen as a beta male, naive, shy type, goody goody type of guy.
 

All these things came about because of he asking me these questions and I answered.

Then for 2-3 days, he has  been acting in a way that angers me a lot. 
As I was walked  beside him, infront of girls he said that why I was walking with a crouched posture and said I should  have  a better posture.
Yesterday, he talked about a comment of my which got 1000 likes but I had made a sexual joke about Kim Kardashian. He said I lacked character, and should also have sent a naked picture of her. 
I got angry and decided to avoid him as much as possible, then as I was walking with my friends today, he comes to me, and starts making fun of me saying- I was carrying such a huge bag. I wonder what is in there. But I wasn't carrying anything much, but still he had to say it and somehow put me down. 
I responded all 3 in a joking, lighthearted  manner, like 'we are just friends' manner.

The thing is, I am an egotistical person. I am a  no-bullshit guy. I don't do well with the 'roast each other' type of friendship, I only have friends who talk with me  in a logical manner.
And the other thing is, he and I are also not that close. We talked with each other may be 3-4 times a month.  However, for 2-3 days uptill yesterday we 'suddenly' met with each other, had a chat, and he started acting jerk. I got angry so decided to not walk up to him to chat, but today he himself came and again set my mood off.

So , I would like to ask, what is going on here?
I am planning to scold him from tomorrow if he tries to put me down again, and throw away the 'we are just friends, we roast each other' bullshit. Because I am not that type of guy and everyone knows that. But for some reason he is putting me down. My guess is, he is jealous of me. There is no other reason. I have 5-6 friends who I chat regulary, happily, who never put me  down, but here he is who for the last 3-4 days is putting me down. I am sure he is jealous of me. If he puts me down I will scold him.

 

 

Edited September 24, 2019 by Ibn Sina

[NoSelfSelf]

I asumme that when you talked about all the achivements he view you as arrongant and full of yourself etc.and thats the parts he repressed in himself so he hates to see it in others ,now hes shy etc and it hurts his ego to see that arrogant,higher achiver is doing better and he thinks he needs to be like that in order to get that...

Edited September 24, 2019 by NoSelfSelf

[Bas]

Consider the possibility of deleting facebook and twitter. I'm not saying you should, just notice while truly considering it as a solution to your emotional issues whether it triggers a heavy emotional backlash or not.

Ok so that was the general answer, now more specific to your situation. Could you play a scenario in your head where you walk with him and he "puts you down" as you say, and you as a response take a deep breath first, feel your chest en belly, then look him in the eye, and tell him something like: "I hate to admit it, and I know you didn't mean it in that way at all, but I think that remark you just made, made me feel bad."

 

1 hour ago, Ibn Sina said:

I only have friends who talk with me  in a logical manner.

That's the problem. Feel into your emotions, and express them, to yourself and to others. As long as you don't the only thing you'll feel is anger.

Leo has a video I believe on how to confront anger, I remember it made a lot of people angry in the comment section, so it must be good.

Edited September 24, 2019 by Bas

[Ibn Sina]

1 hour ago, Bas said:

That's the problem. Feel into your emotions, and express them, to yourself and to others. As long as you don't the only thing you'll feel is anger.

But I find great joy to be with my friends who are  like me. It doesn't create any anger as you are saying. What creates anger is when someone comes and puts me down.

 

1 hour ago, Bas said:

Consider the possibility of deleting facebook and twitter.

Sorry I can't do that. That is not the problem,. I get my self esteem boosts in fb and twitter. My friend is having problem with that.

If you read my post, it's not about me being angry, I am asking why is my friend putting me down.

I suspect that he is jealous. I just want a confirmation.

Anyway, thank you for your input though I have objections with it.

Edited September 24, 2019 by Ibn Sina

[Raptorsin7]

@Ibn Sina Your friend likely felt threatened by your achievements, and now is responding to that feeling by putting you down. A lot of guys have a bro culture where they roast each other and they view it as a sign of there friendship, so it is possible this is just how this guy expresses his friendship, but you will be a better of judge of his motives than i could be. A lot of people in life are psychologically disturbed in some form of another, myself included, and it manifests in treating people in ways that rub them the wrong way, but the person engaging in the behavior is either unaware or they don't have the sense to actually care about how they are making others feel. I strongly recommend against scolding him, you will create unnecessary drama simply to prove to him and those around you that you are a no nonsense guy. Find a more diplomatic way to tell this guy to stop treating you like that, like maybe tell him you don't like that kind of joking around and it's not cool that he keeps doing it. This is very much a him problem not a you problem, but still take care when dealing with these kind of people you don't need to create unnecessary enemies in life it will only cause you hardship in the future.

[Ibn Sina]

15 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

Your friend likely felt threatened by your achievements, and now is responding to that feeling by putting you down. A lot of guys have a bro culture where they roast each other and they view it as a sign of there friendship, so it is possible this is just how this guy expresses his friendship, but you will be a better of judge of his motives than i could be. A lot of people in life are psychologically disturbed in some form of another, myself included, and it manifests in treating people in ways that rub them the wrong way, but the person engaging in the behavior is either unaware or they don't have the sense to actually care about how they are making others feel. I strongly recommend against scolding him, you will create unnecessary drama simply to prove to him and those around you that you are a no nonsense guy. Find a more diplomatic way to tell this guy to stop treating you like that, like maybe tell him you don't like that kind of joking around and it's not cool that he keeps doing it. This is very much a him problem not a you problem, but still take care when dealing with these kind of people you don't need to create unnecessary enemies in life it will only cause you hardship in the future.

Thanx for the advice.

[Aeris]

radical honest truth.

if people become toxic with you cut them out.