Leo, are you sure you want TOTAL awakening? HARDCORE seeker here.

[DoTheWork]

I consider myself being twin of Leo... I have experienced all of the stuff he talks in his videos + have very similar personality.

My background:

30 y/old male, Europe

Many years of HARDCORE spiritual path.

- Clean eating, mostly RAW (no wheat, no dairy, a little meat)
- Being aware ALL DAY LONG - 16 hours a day
- Contemplation and Self Inquiry 3 hours a day
- Meditating in PITCH BLACK room 3 hours a day before midnight (strong determination sitting)
- Concentration exercises
- ejaculating max once per 2 weeks
- Psychedelics (often):

15x 5-MeO-DMT HCL trips
30x 5-Meo-DMT Freebase trips
20x 4-Aco-DMT Fumarate trips
35x DMT Freebase trips
8x DPT trips
60x Weed trips
5x LSD trips
10x 2c-b trips
+ some near death experiences

And some others. Many of my trips happened in pitch black darkness. Always WITHOUT trip sitter.

I have had many "TOTAL" awakenings + experienced many paranormal, mystical phenomena and Kundalini awakening. Third eye opening etc...

I have experienced many logically impossible experiences. Sober or under psychedelics.

I consider myself Awakened consciousness, yet there are infinite degrees of awakening more left. DO YOU GET IT? After MANY infinite trips you will get it.

YES, there are degrees to awakening.

I have experienced MANY lifetimes. In fact, I have experienced ALL possible lifetimes that have existed, exist now or will exist when having many of my mystical experiences.

I have had trips, where I experienced ALL POSSIBLE LIFETIMES OF ALL POSSIBLE CREATURES in 6 hours. Entire lifetimes... YES! All possible creatures. 5-legged ones, or just beings made of energy only, or creature with not 5 or 6 senses but 300 senses etc... Sounds impossible? Well... If you do HARDCORE practices, you can experience many hardcore stuff.

This story about Big Bang and Planet Earth IS JUST ONE OF INFINITE MORE STORIES in infinite more dimensions.

I attained THOUSANDS of "spiritual" insights. Most of them are impossible to put into words and sentences.

"You are God" is just one of INFINITE MORE SPIRITUAL INSIGHTS. I can't describe this statement more, because of the limit of language.

There is INFINITE deepness. In other dimensions I took psychedelics 10000s times potent than DPT.

There are infinite more colors than you can see now in this current dimension.

Be very open-minded reading next lines please.

After many years of being "spiritual"... After my last awakening, I realised that this whole spiritual path is just ONE story of infinite other meaningless stories.

Chasing this whole "who am I?" thing is just of many possible stories and is AS MEANINGLESS AS ANY OTHER STORY.

I awakened to total meaninglessness. TOTAL.

THERE IS NO OTHER PLACE TO BE. I can't escape THIS being.
There is only being.

I experienced that no matter what I do, even if I kill myself, I will be reborn infinite times more.

In fact I have literally physically experienced dying and killing myself in other dimensions just to realise that I can't escape this BEING thing.

After you die, you can choose to "enjoy" formlessness for infinity. BUT that infinity is so infinite, that is finite. Basically, that INFINITY will feel like blink of the eye, and you will get "bored" and will reborn "instantly", after you get bored being formless. READ THAT AGAIN.

In other words: HUMAN DIES, BABY IS BORN. INSTANTLY.

You can't escape... There is only Existence.

No form of suicide is enough. Thanks to this insight, this exact life that I live now, is exactly good as any other life. No life is better than other life.

Thanks to many mystical experiences I realised that businessman has his sufferings and joys, is the same as homeless man has his pains and joys. No difference.

And here comes my question.... Question that no one of you can answer... Because I have used infinite times more potent stuff than your tiny limited human mind, YET I am still searching for answer.

WHAT TO DO NOW?

The thing is, I feel like there is no higher "level" to reach.

I have experienced mahasamadhi in other lifetimes, I have reached TOP OF THE TOP levels of Existence... I have experienced toppest of the tops, I always ended up in some limited dimension. And Now I want to suffer again.

That is the reason I have chosen not to have mahasamadhi in this life (I had many opportunities to have mahasamadhi in this life)

You were God infinite lifetimes before, and now you forgot you wanted to experience being limited again. You forgot you have put yourself here just to limit yourself again. JUST CAUSE. Because you can.

I WANT TO BE HUMAN AGAIN AND TO HAVE ROLLERCOASTER LIFE OF EMOTIONS AND ILLUSIONS.

I want to forget I am God... But I know too much. Too much....

I am serious.

After TOTAL ENLIGHTENMENT, after THE HIGHEST HIGH, there is only a way down.

I just want to warn EVERYBODY:

THERE ARE INSIGHTS that will destroy your life, your motivations, your everything.

There are insights so shocking that will paralyze you.

You will lose interest for friends, movies, music, just about everything. It feels like know everything, have been everything, been everywhere, have done everything...

In every dimension I have lived, there is always this "OMG now I know too much, and there's no way back" level. After that insight, life in that dimension becomes very "meaningless"...

In every dimension there are illusions similar to "Maya", just to protect you. To protect you from "knowing too much" so you can continue enjoying the show.

It feels like the "secret" of Maya have its purpose here in this dimension.

Knowing too much (being awakened) in whatever dimension leads to being unfulfilled. It's like cheating...

Do you enjoy playing a game with "GODMODE: ON" cheat?

If I could choose again, I would not choose to awaken.

This world is made to be for unconscious beings.

Now I have a 2 choices.

Just watching everything, just observing this miraculous colorful explosion.

or

Put myself again into Matrix and forget who am I.

And I think I want to forget. But how?

How could I? How could I deceive myself again?

Basically, I want to warn you...

KNOWING "TOO MUCH" and being robbed of "mandatory" illusions will leave you unsatisfied...

TOTAL ENLIGHTENMENT leads later to total unconsciousness. It's a strange loop.

Even being infinite love will soon or later lead to infinite suffering. You are THE CHANGE. You want CHANGE. Don't ask me why...

YES, I am saying very radical stuff. I have experienced many lives in other dimensions being only "LOVE". But after some time, even LOVE will seem boring.

You will not enjoy your "total awakening" to the infinity... At one point, you basically get bored and want to enjoy being unconscious jerk again...

Soon or later, you may be interested in being Zen Devil just for the sake of doing it.

That's why you see many spiritual gurus having affairs and being zen devils.

There is something deep you can get from this post, but I don't know how to communicate it better, because I am not native english speaker.

Have a nice day.

 

[zeroISinfinity]

@DoTheWork Yes it does feel like blink of an eye Once You "return" "get repeled back". 

It always is the case. 

Trust me I was pissed of as much as you do. 

Cure for it. Complete self acceptance. Love is always the answer. 

Edited September 15, 2019 by zeroISinfinity

[Aakash]

haha that's great you've realised this

and here's the escape route: the practice is: 

"focus on not focusing but realising that even not focusing is still an attempt at focusing"

 

 

 

This all comes from the fact that people misunderstand form= formlessness and means and what absolute infinity is. 

 

Edited September 15, 2019 by Aakash

[zeroISinfinity]

What to do now? 

Question of all of QUESTions. 

Yeah man I understand felt exactly the same as you do. 

Leo said, live your life fully. But "problem" is that you turn into Buddha no desires no meaning no purpose no needs and so on. These things are really most difficult to overcome. 

But beleive it or not they are. 

[Aakash]

@zeroISinfinity its not, you still have not realised the absolute truth. Thats why you don't understand what i mean when i say pointlessness. Its nothing to do with buddha, no purpose , no meaning , no desires, none of that. That is not the reason why. This is a result of becoming enlightened you say this , you haven't experienced why it is actually pointless as a human. Unlike this guy has . 

 

Edited September 15, 2019 by Aakash

[zeroISinfinity]

@Aakash Gimme a break. 

Yes I experienced it and I Perfectly understand. It takes time to recover. I already said Spiritual path Will bring You on knees in every way. 

Not so easy and some things are difficult to stomach. 

 

[Aakash]

@zeroISinfinity HMMM your right, i'm sorry...  This information is not much help to me in the end, i thought it was what i was looking for, but somehow my body reacted to it because it eliminated one of my options. Need to assess which one it did. 

should have known it wouldn't have been this simple  

@DoTheWork  still what i said to you is the way out. up to you if you try it out, thanks for the information. I'm sure it was important for my path. Really appreciate you contributing your experience. 

also really loved the passion!, you still have not really realized how pointless it is. 

I apologise for getting excited, i don't resonate with messages much on the forum, this one i did so i got extra excited. Sorry. 

Edited September 15, 2019 by Aakash

[Peo]

54 minutes ago, DoTheWork said:

In other dimensions I took psychedelics 10000s times potent than DPT.

Want to mention what psychedelics that is?

 

[Peo]

56 minutes ago, DoTheWork said:

THERE ARE INSIGHTS that will destroy your life, your motivations, your everything.

There are insights so shocking that will paralyze you.

You will lose interest for friends, movies, music, just about everything. It feels like know everything, have been everything, been everywhere, have done everything...

But i dont care i want the truth no matter what

[DoTheWork]

@Aakash I totally get your posts. It's pure gold. Thank you.

Enlightenment is The Cosmic joke, that leaves your CURRENT life meaningless...

NOW I HAVE A BIGGER FISH TO FRY!!!! I AM ON THE PATH OF FORGETTING ENLIGHTENMENT!!!! And that is a lot more difficult than awakening...

See you in 20 years.... Until my awakening to "NORMAL-ness" happen.

 

@zeroISinfinity Thank you

@Mikael89 Thank you!

 

 

 

[Aakash]

@DoTheWork

"NOW I HAVE A BIGGER FISH TO FRY!!!! I AM ON THE PATH OF FORGETTING ENLIGHTENMENT!!!! And that is a lot more difficult than awakening... 

See you in 20 years.... Until my awakening to "NORMAL-ness" happen."

 

I garuntee it will do exactly that  i have confirmed it absoutely, just finding another viable source to confirm it, but it works, 

just get as close as you can and when leave the rest to fate 

yeah it will probably take 20 years 

and i will say this 

perfection is important, its not in the doers hand

[zeroISinfinity]

@Aakash ❤️

@DoTheWork Search for escape, search for non existance and so on. 

That is the last and final step. 

You Will laugh trust me. You Will like really really laugh. 

This is the last step on your path. 

Hope You finally see it. ?

Edited September 15, 2019 by zeroISinfinity

[WelcometoReality]

@DoTheWork Thank you for sharing your insights. It's always a hard task to write down your realizations in a thoughtful manner, so thank you for taking your time to do so.

Perhaps it's time stop all these spiritual practices and let the body have some time to integrate all your experiences? Maybe be in nature for a bit. For example enjoy a walk on the beach with bare feet in the sand. Or trekk in the woods for a couple of miles. Physical work is also nice. Especially outdoors.

[DoTheWork]

13 minutes ago, Peo said:

Want to mention what psychedelics that is?

 

I did not know the name in that dimension... Names as we know them are only in this dimension, and are feature of our language. But there are "CONSCIOUSNESS raising" substances in many other dimensions.

[Aakash]

@DoTheWork one question 

so you did all of that reached enlightenment,  but you are enlightened in the sense that you know what the present moment is?? 

Edited September 15, 2019 by Aakash

[wavydude]

Don't do drugs, kids

[DoTheWork]

@Aakash I realised I know nothing.

How do I know that I AM? It's simple now:

I am a "Thingless thing" which is aware of itself simply thanks to being aware of other "things" (colors, sounds...)

I know myself only because there is my "colourful-soundful" reflection. HERE. NOW. HERE-NOW. HERENOW!

This "colorful soundful feelingful scene" reflects my existence back to me.

I would not know myself if there were no things in "the scene" (in experience), yet I will still be Truth.

[TrynaBeTurquoise]

Getting out the popcorn for this thread.

Q: What were these psychedelics in other dimensions like that were infinitely more potent than DPT? Lol

Like, what psychedelic in this earthly realm led you to trying those other psychedelics in other dimensions? 

[Aakash]

@DoTheWork ahhhhh so that’s what it means 

coupled up with the fact I never broke down begginning and end duality. Thanks it goes on for infinity awakening. Thanks for completing my knowledge these were the two I was missing. 

Your answer is the same as everyone else’s. 

I get it now 

so are you going to try what I suggested? It won’t make you unenlightened. 

Your gonna have to find another way to make yourself unenlightened. What I’m saying is that it will leave you in pure nothing. Which is different to becoming unenlightened or even the realisation of now itself and absolute infinity. 

Its as you would put it ... the end of reincarnation as you’ve witnessed in your own direct expeirience. 

@zeroISinfinity sorry you were right about your side of the knowledge. What I’m talking about isn’t connected to all of this. So I guess it doesn’t matter. But Interestingly enough though you could try what I said as the practice and there is a chance to get there. Still only a belief until you do it lol. If anyone ever does. I think I’m happy with getting to where you guys are now. I just wanted to get the knowledge structure down first. Hehehe, now to take the path. 

Sorry to everyone for being such a troublesome person lol. I finally got it. None of you are enlightened hehehe, you are all just now as I am aware of. But not as a direct experience. 

[TrynaBeTurquoise]

Also what lead you to awakening in the first place? You obviously were unsatisfied and were seeking something higher. And wouldnt “un-awakening” (is that even possible) just bring you back into that same unsatisfied state of being? Why not just give these psychedelics a pause and integrate for a while. 

You seem to be fundamentally not accepting that which you are. Like you discovered the truth but are now in resistance to the truth, when what else would there be?