third failure at 22 and how to deal with it

[Andre_3]

Hi everyone,
I'm 22, and a few days ago I experienced my third failure at a open competition in the army. This competition lasts about 9 months, consists of several phases and there are about 50 places for 6000 candidates. It offers a very prestigious job in the military field. this was the last year I could try, due to my age, max 22. 
I did my best, but I couldn't win and I disappointed not only myself but also my family. 
in two months I have another competition, for a less prestigious career but in the same field. moreover, entering would mean being able to run the next year for the first competion ( if your enter in the same field there is a higher age limit, up to 28 years)
My heart is in pieces, I'm trying to prepare myself for this new contest but I have my head somewhere else, I have many regrets and it seems to me that at 22 I am already old and have wasted all the possibilities I had, regrets destroy me. i tried 3 times and i failed 3 times..what a great job! i still have hope, but it hurts like hell.

is there anyone who can give me some advice?

thank you
 

Edited September 10, 2019 by Andre_3

[tsuki]

40 minutes ago, Andre_3 said:

is there anyone who can give me some advice?

Remember what kind of person you were when you were 20 years younger, when you were 2.
That is how naive you will seem to your 42 year old self that will still have at least 20 more years to live.

Keep on fighting, give it everything you possibly can!
At the very least, so that you will not blame yourself for not doing everything you possibly could.

And remember: it takes as much strength to give up your dreams when they are not viable, as it takes to pursue them.

Edited September 10, 2019 by tsuki

[Strangeloop]

Success is just a bunch of failures, so keep trying

[fridjonk]

@Andre_3 Figure out what you are best at and what you are worst at, work on your weaknesses. 

Unpack your fears and face them head on, don't hide from them. 

And last but not least, set big goals. If you can only do 10 pull-ups and set your goal to 20, you might not get 20 but at least you'll get 15, instead of just 10.

[Girzo]

Great job... in the military.  I envy your determination for the job. If I had to work full-time in the army I would stab my eyes out. So many ethnocentric pricks you have to deal with on a daily basis there, it's insane. 

In ten years you will grow up so much that you will laugh at yourself looking back and wonder why did you care so much.

There are many unscripted careers you can enter as anyone at any age. Most of them better than working in the military. Just open your mind to new possibilities. Maybe read a book about entrepreneurship, I recommend "The Millionaire Fastlane" by MJ DeMarco. I know, it's a cheesy title, but the book is truly life-changing.

[Average Investor]

I've had quite a few unsuccessful businesses. You learn new skills and tricks each time you fail. "You win some, you learn some" is probably the best way to look at it. If you get so stuck in the mindset of failure, then you will just continue to fail. It will be okay. Things are not always meant to be. You may find there is another calling you are much more passionate about as well. I'm 23 myself. 

[ajasatya]

@Andre_3 I understand that you want to join the army. But aren't you limiting your perspective of your entire Life too much? I mean, you're a human being, alive, at 22. There is so much you can do in a lifetime. Why suffer so much with a narrow perspective?