How Do You Deal With Your Family Thinking You're A Lunatic?

[ZenDog]

I am 20 years old and I have been doing self actualization work seriously for about a year now.

When we go on this journey we will most likely experience some resistance from the people around us. I expected this to happen, so I didn't see it as a big deal.

I spend 1.5 hours a day on consciousness work (meditation and enlightenment work). I actually don't get any resistance from my friends, in fact most my friends think it is cool and impressive I am able to be that commited and disicplined, and when I explained to them why I do it and the benefits, they understood and even considered starting meditation themselves.

 

But my family is giving me a lot of shit. At first when I started doing like 20 min meditation a day, they were like "hmm.. yea everyone could benefit from a little stress relief." But yeah I immediately got hooked and bumped it up to 1.5 hours a day, and now they think im fucking crazy, eventough 1.5 h isn't even that much lol. When I told them I am going to a 4 week retreat they not only think im out of my mind, they are worried.

I get comments all the time like: 

"You are getting brainwashed!",

"You used to be so scientific and rational and now you have become a religious fanatic." 

"Are you going to become one of those bald guys with orange robes?"

"Why do you have to be so fanatic!!??"

 

I keep explaining over and over again why I do it and that I am just fascinated with exploring the depths of my consciousness, and that it is not religious or a belief system, but no matter what I say they just roll their eyes and don't even pay attention to what I am saying. I couldn't care less if they get it or not, I never bring up the topic or preach it to anyone, but they keep asking me and giving me shit all the time.

Now whenever I am going to some family gathering with my grandparents, cousins etc.. I know they are going to ask me "sooee.. I hear you are meditating alot lately?" and I really I don't want to explain myself becasue I know they are just going to laugh at me. 

 

How do you deal with this? Don't get me wrong I love my family, they have always been extremely supportive of me, except until now. 

 

[Ajax]

Here is a basic fact about humanity:

They like what they understand and they don't like what they don't understand.

The reason they don't understand is because they have certain fixed viewpoints and limiting beliefs about something. Now these things are only resolved by self realization and trying to talk about it or explain something will be pointless. It a "teacup is overflowing" kinda deal. Course you gotta realize you can't empty their teacup for them.

Therefore, if it bothers you... don't bother trying to explain. Just use the only weapon against misunderstanding that you can, Communication. Of course you know communication is sending and receiving. If you are sending communication sufficiently, then the problem is on the receiving end. Therefore any attempts that you try to communicate should be directed toward discovering the obstructions at the receiving end.
 

This means that instead of talking, you must practice listening. You should be asking probing questions, asking for more details, better explanations, seek clarification, etc... This will accomplish several things.

First, it will allow you to see the obstructions for what they are. Therefore you will see that they are based on assumptions. Therefore you won't take their stabs at you so personally.

Secondly, it will force them to question their reality and therefore will possible open their mind to new possibilities or at least make them more self conscious about even bringing up the subject with you because they don't want to face the fear about questioning their own reality.

You see the reason they are doing this is not because they are malicious... It is because they have this stable reality about life that they constructed by their considerations(fixed viewpoints). It is a false reality and deep down they know it. Therefore, they   live in fear that if the truth was revealed, their fragile world would blow apart into a million pieces.(it might be a good idea to rewatch leo's video about lies). Since you know that they are living in fear, you should realize that the things that they do are out of fear. Things done out of fear are not sane, they are insane. Therefore from this angle you should understand that they are acting out of insanity. Reacting to insanity is not a sane thing to do.

Hopefully this has helped, my friend

Edited May 6, 2016 by Ajax

[vizual]

Just be the weird lunatic, own it. If they sense you don't give a crap they will back down and probably be intrigued and inspired by you standing for something. Being normal is overrated, and what is being normal in this society anyway? I'd argue that being normal in this society is aching towards lunacy way more than someone who is into meditation lol.

Keep meditating man, the truth will set you free, and everyone around you if they open up to it.

[Sri McDonald Trump Maharaj]

Me: Mom! Do you know what I will do with my life?

Mom: What?

Me: Sit down and do nothing

Mom: *no reply*

[SkyPanther]

This may not totally fit you because this is from a Buddhist perspective, but it does deal with Family and their ideas of "Brainwashing" and enlightenment work.  This is on retreat (the guy in the white is there on retreat). 

Meditation is about "brainwashing"... you are removing all the concepts and "trash" that society has put in your head. 

Edited May 6, 2016 by SkyPanther

[Tancrede Pouyat]

Tell them you do Personal Development. Tell them you're really passionate about it. Tell them you're not going to stop just because they're not doing Personal Development. Tell them their reaction is perfectly normal, because that's homeostasis. And, most importantly, Do Great Things. Live an Extraordinary Life !

[charlie2dogs]

On 5/6/2016 at 9:37 AM, ZenDog said:

I am 20 years old and I have been doing self actualization work seriously for about a year now.

When we go on this journey we will most likely experience some resistance from the people around us. I expected this to happen, so I didn't see it as a big deal.

I spend 1.5 hours a day on consciousness work (meditation and enlightenment work). I actually don't get any resistance from my friends, in fact most my friends think it is cool and impressive I am able to be that commited and disicplined, and when I explained to them why I do it and the benefits, they understood and even considered starting meditation themselves.

 

But my family is giving me a lot of shit. At first when I started doing like 20 min meditation a day, they were like "hmm.. yea everyone could benefit from a little stress relief." But yeah I immediately got hooked and bumped it up to 1.5 hours a day, and now they think im fucking crazy, eventough 1.5 h isn't even that much lol. When I told them I am going to a 4 week retreat they not only think im out of my mind, they are worried.

I get comments all the time like: 

"You are getting brainwashed!",

"You used to be so scientific and rational and now you have become a religious fanatic." 

"Are you going to become one of those bald guys with orange robes?"

"Why do you have to be so fanatic!!??"

 

I keep explaining over and over again why I do it and that I am just fascinated with exploring the depths of my consciousness, and that it is not religious or a belief system, but no matter what I say they just roll their eyes and don't even pay attention to what I am saying. I couldn't care less if they get it or not, I never bring up the topic or preach it to anyone, but they keep asking me and giving me shit all the time.

Now whenever I am going to some family gathering with my grandparents, cousins etc.. I know they are going to ask me "sooee.. I hear you are meditating alot lately?" and I really I don't want to explain myself becasue I know they are just going to laugh at me. 

 

How do you deal with this? Don't get me wrong I love my family, they have always been extremely supportive of me, except until now. 

 

Why did your family need to know you were meditating in the first place?  Maybe you should have kept that to yourself and your own private and very important practice. Then you could have worked on your personal growth without their opinions and criticisms,  Why did you feel the need for them to know what you were doing?

Regroup, make your personal growth a private thing for you personally.  It is apparent they dont understand what you are doing, so why involve them in it?  If you want to talk about it, do it here on this site, most here will contribute the best they can to help you and i dont think you will get a lot of criticism here.  there is an old saying, and dont take this the wrong way, it has nothing to do with your family, its just a lesson in how and what you share with who.  The saying is cast not your pearls before swine, lest they turn and rend you and trample you underfoot.  What is sacred to you, keep it to yourself unless you are sharing with like minded people.   This one things creates a lot of stress and problems for many.