When is the right time for a relationship?

[Average Investor]

I realize maybe there is not always  "right time" for anything. 

Monetary success wise? 

Personal development wise? 

I still live with my mom at 23. But I've kind of hit a turning point in my business where a 6 figure income could be obtainable in the coming years. I work very hard at my business. Sometimes 60 hours a week or more. Almost have it at the point where I can start hiring people and have time to myself more. I'm not loaded by any means right now. I spend everything on the business and expenses. 

I feel like I have not explored enough of life really. I have been getting into new hobbies like hiking and mountain biking.  I want to travel and explore a bit doing those things. 

I've been practicing meditation for a bit over a 6 months. I have done a pretty large amount of shadow work and work with addictions in the last year. But I am definitely not in the woowoo spectrum. I am still running through stage orange a bit. But incorporate a lot of stage green and yellow life style and thinking. Especially in terms of compassion etc. I can keep up with Leo's advanced teachings. 

Of course I meet a lot of interesting women and I have had previous relationships. I have quite a few prospects that are attractive and seem nice. 

I seemingly have a problem of getting too invested with the relationship. In terms of money and time. I threw away a lot of personal development and business progress in my last one. Not to mention it was a bad relationship on both ends in terms of what would go on. To be fair I was not nearly as developed in my last one at all. My progress in that time made me realize I was in a sinking ship. 

Should I just blow off the thought of relationship and max out my income? Keep working on myself more and more? Or was the last relationship maybe the cause for my large spike in growth? Maybe it could bring a lot more opportunities etc. 

I feel like I would really need to be really good at relationships in order to have a really well functioning one that could last the rest of my life.  I hardly see anyone expect previous older generations (People who are 70-80 now) with anything long lasting. I would like the idea of having a family eventually, but I have my whole life to go for that, however long that might be. 

What is your experience with them? 

 

 

[Average Investor]

Any advice? 

[Pav]

Begin learning and experiencing this part of life now. There's no need to put it off until you reach some future milestone in business, this is likely a rationalisation stemming from fear. Wherever there is fear, that's your call to action. The fact that you made this post suggests that some part of you is dissatisfied with your current trajectory.

Relationships are a major part of life, along with career and spirituality. Failure to align yourself with your highest conceivable good and actualise in any of these areas results in neurosis. 

Having success in one of these areas will certainly flow over to the others, but you'll without a doubt have to dedicate the time and energy to each individually if you want to engage with life fully. Your exact balance is something you'll have to figure out through experience and contemplation, and will change throughout the course of your life.

[Average Investor]

@Pav I appreciate your response. I thought about the rat park experiment and I started reading authentic happiness. I think having a partner and eventually a family is a big part of being happy. I remember being really happy at certain points in other relationships. I am happy now alone and working through what I can. I am trying to put all I got into this business right now. As I don't want it to just be a dream. I want it to be a reality. 

I was abused by my last partner emotionally and verbally. I am not perfect for sure, but she did do a fair amount of damage. I have done some introspection lately to see that. And I have been ordering some books on relationships and studying them a bit. I was in a 2 year relationship with that ex 8 months ago or so. So I have had time to heal and work on myself. It has been excellent. I just worry a relationship could dig into my money or my spiritual growth deeply. But maybe I will be able to find someone going on the same path, or at least stage green. Not to say that money is everything. But business costs aren't cheap either. 

You're right though. I can't just avoid them. I actually have been avoiding this girl because I know she will ask me out if she sees me in person. I heard her talking about it. I do feel bad because I expressed some interest in her. I do think she is pretty and all. So maybe I will go on a date with her. I wonder how much physical attraction I should have? She mostly just seems nice is why I like her. But there is other options that look better. But I suppose in any relationship there always is. I don't have any issues sticking with one though and have realistic expectations. I don't watch any porn etc.