can't fall asleep after 5meo bad trip, it's been 4 days please help

[Nahm]

@khalifa

Well, the theme seems to be creating the feeling of discord or resistance, by comparing to past, future, self and others. Then not liking how that feels. Then comparing & complaining about how it feels. If you were to aim at turning this around, my best guess is that it would be noticing and being impeccable with your word. Ever read The Four Agreements? Very short but impactful book. Wishing you well my friend. 

5 hours ago, Nahm said:

@khalifa

What if it turned out sleep was the furthest thing from something to fear, but more relaxation, peace, love? Any perspectives about sleep, life, yourself, that would then not hold up anymore so to speak?

 

I think this is the same theme, though if I was in your shoes & perspective I’d feel exactly the same. A google on self fulfilling prophecies, and law of attraction (YouTube Abraham Hicks) could be very helpful if and when you’re ready to reach for a better feeling perspective. I think there’s a point we reach where it’s actually easier to let go and feel deeply than to continue thinking to avoid feeling. If it resonates. Best of luck, hoping for the best for ya. 

[Aaron p]

10 hours ago, khalifa said:

no blissful sensations

Ok so this is something I've found out that apparently nobody else realizes here...or at least nobody else talks about. Depending on how *your* batch of 5meo is made...the effects will vary. I theorise that 5meo can be extremely "disphoric", confusing and very disorienting when slightly impure. I've had two different batches of 5meo and I can tell intuitively which one is purer. 

If your not experiencing full body orgasms or something like that (pure Bliss and ultimate Euphoria) then your specific batch of 5meo may be impure. Try a different batch

8 hours ago, khalifa said:

now that i think about it, i don't really have a strong life purpose and i'm ok with that as i've been trying to figure that out for quite awhile

If I were to look into the past and give myself one piece of advice concerning finding my life purpose, I would say this, "what service or product would you provide for free for people?" This eliminates  the monetary aspect and with deep authenticity you can find out with this question. For me, I would help people who have massive shadows, making their lives shit. Tell them about consciousness work as a means to reduce suffering measurably. What would you do for free...? 

 

8 hours ago, khalifa said:

as for hobbies, for days where i sleep terribly, i don't feel like engaging in them since i feel brain dead reaction time wise, like gaming for example or even watching stuff

relationships, i'm not doing well, i'm mostly a loner but that's normal i guess

Shadow shadow shadow. Get yourself some pure 5meo brother

 

3 hours ago, khalifa said:

Something feels very off, life feels strange now, worrisome, but it does feel like i'll appreciate life even more when i do make it back to that baseline, I do still appreciate life more even now as i've been to depths that i can't explain how awful those first months were. But it's a rollercoaster.

 

Shadow.

How to remove shadow: kriyga yoga, meditation, inquiry, *pure* 5meo (bliss) as opposed to 5meo that isint amazingly pure. Shadow fucks up your life. Consciousness work fucks up your shadow. Just get better at beating your shadows ass to a pulp. @khalifa

[Psychonaut]

@khalifa I did have troubles sleeping 2 years ago after some 5-meo trips. Mostly due to sub optimal high dosage trips (~50mg plugged) and one particularly foolish trip. That was taking around 50mg in a completely dark room with no music or anything to ground me. It made me face one of my greatest fears which is being cast out into outer space. Outer space for me is the same as death. It is a space completely devoid of anything alive. It is like being separated from everything which provides a base for me to live. A separation from the mother earth which is the seed of my life. After this particularly traumatizing trip I got PTSD like flashbacks where I would wake up in the night unable to breath.

In the beginning taking 5-meo felt like dying to me. I was fighting and it made it a nightmare. After some time it got better. I imagined I would go to sleep and wake up again. I know sleep is a bit problematic for you atm. However, normally when I go to sleep I am completely at peace. I can let go of my body trusting that I will wake up the next day. Even if I don't wake up I will still be at peace because I won't be there for the entire "dying show". I simply won't wake up. That is beautiful to me. I wished I could feel this feeling of the final let go before going to sleep all the time. This "Ah, I am finally at rest and peace".

It seems like there are always two poles of how one can view something and the attitude one can take towards life. I like to ask myself "Am I happy to be alive or am I just waiting to finally die?". Am I in a position were I bring forth more of the creative energy which created me. Or am I in a position where I am resentful, destructive, unwilling or unable to put my creative force to good use? In that case it destroys me slowly.

5-meo has started a long journey of self discovery for me. I am often blown away by all the memories and attachments that are uncovered. Stuff from childhood which still affects my behaviour. I hope you will complete your journey and wish you all the best.

My 5-meo a few years back was indeed like @Aaron p describes, I also most likely had a bad batch of 5-meo (yellow, oily and the cheapest I could find). I have stopped plugging 5-meo-dmt. I find plugging to be uncomfortable and it starts of the trip with this feeling of unease. I have started smoking it in lower doses and then refilling it for many times. For me it has become what I would describe as a feeling of love and a strong full body orgasm.

[latina25]

@khalifa   Hi there,

You mention Lack of health. Can I ask you how do you feel physically thought your day?

Do you still have that vibrational energy you spoke about. Does it feel like is tuck in your body and not being release? Any brain frog?

 

 

[latina25]

@khalifa   Hi there,

You mention Lack of health. Can I ask you how do you feel physically thought your day?

Do you still have that vibrational energy you spoke about. Does it feel like is tuck in your body and not being release? Any brain frog?

 

 

[khalifa]

 

@Psychonaut Thank you for sharing your experience, Would you recommend me to smoke lower doses of 5meo instead? And yes mine was pretty cheap too just as you described.  Do you still have to let go before blessing out when smoking or is it just instant bliss with that type of quality 5meo?

 

 

@Aaron p As for 5meo are you sure it varies and it's not in your head which one makes you feel blissed out and the ones that make you terror like? You still have to let go before blissing out or its instant bliss without letting go?

 

@Nahm I've been following abraham for quite awhile, before 5meo i felt lots of well being following her teachings, but these days it's just difficult to make myself feel good since it's not easy to do so without base well being that i used to have. Will keep trying though, thank you for your time. I'll let it go slowly, this too shall pass.

 

 

@latina25  It varies from day to day, If i focus on it too much it feels shitty, If i'm distracted it doesn't feel as bad. Brain fog can be lots or less on some days too. And yes vibrations are always present, also food and fasting affects it, i've noticed, eating a lot can make it become much less or more it's weird, fasting for longer periods will make me vibrate way more.

[Nahm]

@khalifa

Godspeed man. If you can, notice well being is actual nowness, reality, here & now...and ‘well being’ or ‘baseline’ is only a thought about a past, and about feeling in a past. That’ll never lead to feeling better, because feeling is here now present, and you’re belief is that it is in a past.  You are making that comparison between actual well being now, and a thought of well being, being a past, and missing that one is the actual well being now and one is a thought about well being in a past. So you’d be believing you’re making a comparison, but you’re actually not. The “comparison” doesn’t feel good because there’s no truth or actuality to it. You keep labeling that feeling, rather than listening to it and understanding it. 

Well being is the love which = now and = you. Each time you think it’s in a past...the very well being you’re talking about, which is present now, is ‘saying’ “uh, no sir. Right here loving you, literally being you”...and you might be misinterpreting that feeling, by continuing to believe your thought / perspective about a “past”...and a “you” in a “past”. 

In any case, when you are ready to, and actually begin choosing perspectives, those which feel good to you...you’ll inherently, by default, be ‘connecting with your source’, feeling well being now, and feeling better and better. You’ll see that how you’ve been feeling has to do with how you’ve been looking at what happened a year ago...not that it ‘left a mark’ and is the reason why. 

Same thing with 5meo and your trip. That’s only, quite literally - a thought. It’s completely gone. It was a relative experience which came and went. However, you default to it as the reason you feel the way you feel - now. That is not the reason you don’t feel so great now. You’re arriving at a perspective which does not resonate with feeling - and you’re believing the perspective anyways. You don’t have to do that. You don’t have the relative experience of that trip now, you have thoughts about it now. So how you feel has nothing to do with that experience. It has only to do with the thoughts about it, right now. You’ll need to find your way to realizing this, and changing your perspective in alignment with now, with feeling. Feeling is not in a past or future, and therefore feeling better, or better feeling, are not in a past or future. The more you repeat, assert & insist that feeling better is in a past or future, the more you suffer. The more you let those beliefs & perspectives go, the better you feel - cause feeling = now. 

Prior to that, and reinforced by that, are belief(s) about yourself which do not feel good & have never felt good. These beliefs and perspectives are never going to feel good or resonate with you. Notice, rather than understanding and recognizing this, you’re creating negative beliefs about yourself to compensate for your beliefs that you feel the way you do now, because of a trip and or events in your past. This is basic identifying with a past, identifying as a separate self in time. Most simply put - believing thoughts & suffering, instead of meditating daily. What is pertinent, is your perspective & attitude, & willingness to be open minded & let go of what doesn’t feel good to you. Noticing how things like complaining and then identifying yourself as a complainer doesn’t feel good. Change your perspective & outlook, by being on purpose with what you say, rather that just lazily ‘going with’ what doesn’t even feel good to you. Love ya man, Godspeed. Wishing you wonderful changes in what you’re creating.  

[Psychonaut]

@khalifa Nothing you can really do about the vibrations other than to let it do its thang.

Difficult to say if its just multiple years of maturation on my side or just the different 5-Meo or both. For me its easier to smoke, because one can extend the trip by smoking more. Never attempted to plug more during a trip.

[Username]

@khalifa I had similar symptoms but nowhere near as intense. I had very weird trippy dream few days after 5 meo DMT. I 'm also became able to have similar experiences to 5 meo DMT just by simple breathing exercise and pushing air into right spot. When I am sleepy I often feel vibrations and have mild visuals. I experience some spontaneous nondual glimpses nearly every day. It feels scary at times. The only difference is that I experience 1% of intensity you described. It should naturally even out.

[khalifa]

@Username

I am functioning much better these days, i get to sleep, the nights are much shorter sometimes not always, But the unease feelings/anxiety/worry/vibrations are always there, makes me wonder if it'll ever go away since it's already been over a year. My body doesn't feel normal like it used to be. And when i close my eyes the void seems different that what i used to have. I learnt to cope with it, but i still dislike feeling this way, i'd rather have the baseline well being and peace I once had. Feels like i can't rest properly and just have to constantly grind and distract myself from this feeling, I just can't get a break to relax. Even though it's toned down a notch compared to the first months up to 8months. it still doesn't feel good :c

 

Martin did mention he had a client that had the same feelings i've described up to 5 years years, a smoke fixed it for him. And as for psychonaut's post above, it makes me wonder if i should give it a try, doesn't seem like it may even out that fast. plus we're all different at the same time

 

Edited November 19, 2020 by khalifa

[MsNobody]

@Dizzy had the same problem, epsom salt bath and also herbal teas, camomile, valerian etc, you went far away and now need to ground yourself, spend time in nature barefoot, it will pass after 7 to 10 days. 

Think that your little body just experienced the whole universe and now needs to go back to its normal size. Sending you love 

[Preety_India]

@MsNobody you're absolutely beautiful. Have fun girl. 

[MsNobody]

@Preety_India Awwww!! Thank you pretty India, I love reading your posts, lots of wisdom