Understand Your Emotions, Release it too! - Share All Your BEST Tips - Mega-Thread

[Sunny J Gupta]

The Goal Of This Mega-Thread: 

• Understand what your emotions are, in your direct experience. Just observing and learning about your emotions, what they are, how they work, etc. will do so much for releasing them and not letting them take control over your life. 
• Take back control over your life. When you are so tangled up in your negative emotions, it can be hard to even get out of bed, take positive actions for your life, and have hope for life. 
• Develop a passion for, and more and more recognizing how big and important this topic is for your life 
• Keep it simple. Just share your best tips for understanding and releasing your emotions. I know people are suffering from attachment to their emotions, and getting into personal debates with other members in this forum is not going to help you or them gain valuable insights to solve their emotional problems. 

A beautiful vision:

• I can picture it now. Imagine how nice it would be if you and others can go on a journey to take back control over your life. Take someone who is negative about life, hopeless, have much victim mentality, doesn't take much action in their life, has many emotional problems, and move them up to a life where they have hope, can start to see the beauty in life, have many moments of joy and peace and courage, and that fuels them to pursue higher ideals of a great life. 

A good method for going on this journey of dealing with your emotions

1. Study many high quality sources for handling negative emotions
2. Explore many tools experientially to understand and release your emotions. 
3. Find 1 good tool that you can use consistently, whether that is daily, weekly, or even on a moment-to-moment basis for consistently better understanding and releasing your negative emotions. 

Warning: 

• I am not perfect. I have just gotten many recent insights. No one is perfect. I am not a professional nor certified. I am not an expert by any means. Many who will comment are not experts or perfect or certified either.

Why am I doing this: 

• I have been doing meditation now for 3 years, but only in the last 12 months or so I have been cultivating a passion for understanding and releasing emotions. 
• I would argue that aside from dealing with serious money and physical health issues, this is the next best aspect of your life to handle. 

Who the fuck am I?

• I am not much different than you. I am not trying to be superior than anyone. 
• I am just a regular guy who has gotten real, life changing results and insights on understanding and releasing his emotions from reading many books on emotions, doing many practices for emotions, but MOST IMPORTANTLY, developing a relatively hardcore 24/7 practice to observe, release, accept, and let go of emotions over the past 2 months. 

Other thoughts: 

• I don't know if I am allowed to create a mega-thread, I can just see the massive potential from this. 
• I will be putting my insights here over time. I want a place to share my insights, and I feel like this would be a great place. I encourage you guys to do the same. Whenever you get some valuable insights please share it with us

 

Edited July 29, 2019 by Sunny J Gupta

[Sunny J Gupta]

My best tool so far for dealing with negative emotions: The Sedona Method

What is the process simplified? 

Simply ask these questions to yourself in this specific order. 

In this moment right now: 

1. What is your NOW feeling? (Identify the specific emotion you are feeling, and spend a few moments observing that feeling. Ex. Fear that my parent's won't like me if I become a musician. Identify this as just fear. That this fear is NOT you. Get some space from this emotion by seeing it as an emotion, and you are the observer of this emotion) 
2. Could you welcome/allow that feeling? (Answer yes or no. Don't overthink it. And if you can say yes, then spend a few moments actually allowing the emotion. If you said no, move on to the next question)  
3. Could you let it go? (yes or no? if yes, then let it go. Simple. If no, move to the next question) 
4. Would you let it go? (Yes or no) 
5. When? 

Additional tips, notes, etc. 

• These 5 questions are for a specific emotion.
• This process is good because it doesn't forcefully make you go through a process where you are really uncomfortable. It feels like a very natural, yet powerful way of releasing. 
• Maybe 3-4 times a day, take out 10 to 30 minutes and just repeat that process over and over again on any emotion you are experiencing.
• Don't compulsively or emotionally ask these questions. And after asking these questions, spend a few moments to a few minutes to get EXPERIENCE of where the question is leading you experientially. For ex. "Could you welcome/allow that feeling?" when you ask this question, say yes or no, and then experientially allow that feeling. It should feel like an experience and not a thinking process after asking the question. 
• Often answering no releases the emotion. Any point when doing this questions the emotions will be released. 
• This is simple, yet powerful.
• You're not getting even the full experience by just doing 1 cycle of these questions a few times a day. It should be cycle after cycle for 10 to 30 minutes straight every day. You are trying to understand your emotions, start to see how they work, etc. So you need to have consistency and be attentive for a certain duration for this to really work. 
• You will get better over time at releasing. You will also release emotions from the bag of emotions you suppressed over the decades. 

 

[Sunny J Gupta]

Common mechanisms the ego-mind uses to feed negative emotions:

1. A need to control. Let go of the need for control. 

2. A need for a certain outcome. Let go of the certain outcome you are attaining. 

3. Resistance to what is. Allow this resistance. If you can't allow the resistance, allow that feeling of not being able to allow that resistance. Go meta, essentially. 

4. A need for certainty. The ego-mind loves certainty. Let go of the need for certainty in various situations where you need to be certain. 

5. Let go of trying to let go. 

[Rilles]

Stop calling them negative emotions. They are not negative. Sit with them. Not because youre trying to get somewhere. Because youve ignored them so long, now youre here with them. 

[Yannik]

Hey Sunny, thanks for this thread. I want to ask you something. The Sedona Method has never really worked for me even though I've read the book and tried it a lot of times. I don't know why that is, do you have a clue?

 

Going to the gym or taking a cold shower always worked 10x better to release the emotion at least for me

[Callum Milner]

@Yannik send me a message bro I may be able to help out with that

 

[Nivsch]

On 29.7.2019 at 4:13 AM, Sunny J Gupta said:

Common mechanisms the ego-mind uses to feed negative emotions:

1. A need to control. Let go of the need for control. 

2. A need for a certain outcome. Let go of the certain outcome you are attaining. 

3. Resistance to what is. Allow this resistance. If you can't allow the resistance, allow that feeling of not being able to allow that resistance. Go meta, essentially. 

4. A need for certainty. The ego-mind loves certainty. Let go of the need for certainty in various situations where you need to be certain. 

5. Let go of trying to let go. 

Haha love this one

[Sunny J Gupta]

@Yannik Hey man, sorry for the late reply. 

My best guess is that if it is not working for you, you might have too much monkey mind going on right now, and could benefit from some hatha yoga, for me Isha hatha yoga does wonders (paid programs) 

But while reading the Sedona method, I have invested roughly 22-26 hours so far, and I have only gotten through 1/4th of the book. This book in particular is not meant to be breezed through. You will really reap the rewards by reading, stopping at any exercise, doing the exercise, then return to the reading.

Also I have a 24/7 Sedona method habit which really does the real job. I do it in the shower, while driving, while walking, while talking, before and after sleeping. Just do it as much as you can, as consciously, passionately, and enjoyably. 

And if you are stuck, just keep reading the book and doing the practices, you will get better and better at this over time. It takes some time to get distance from your ego-mind structure, but I can assure you this really works, and it is super powerful.