Impermanence and reality is driving me insane.

[Shaun]

I went on a 4 day camping trip and loved it. On arriving home, I was basically curled up on the floor overwhelmed with misery, mainly due to the experience being over and coming back to my usual mundane life. I find it almost impossible to cope with the impermanence aspect of reality. The misery it causes me is utterly immense and I find it impossible to hold space and presence for now. I don't have any way to cope with it. I just want experience to end before I go totally insane.

[flume]

The only thing that is permanent in your experience is you. So maybe try and provide yourself some permanence? You obviously need stability to get through the day. Prioritise that over trying to grasp concepts that are overwhelming you. Thinking about it won’t help. Try to do more and think less. Follow your genius. Solutions might present themselves through actions, sometimes when you least expect it. Just some suggestions: Have a date or a call with a friend once a week, join a hiking group, take the same kind of walk everyday, put some time in something that sparks your interest/ a creative project, look up job alternatives that excite you, make a vision board, etc.

You obviously had a great time the past days. Maybe loving your camping trip/ being outside so much is trying to tell you something.
Sometimes when you start meditating things you thought were ‘kind of ok’, like a job for example, suddenly seem terrible and situations become unbearable. You can’t deny the obvious anymore: it’s time for a change. Let’s be honest, you’re probably not living the life you want. How long are you gonna be stuck in this? :-) 

We will probably have to deal with the impermanence thing at some point but this day doesn’t have to be today.
All in good time.

[Forestluv]

@Shaun I can relate. There is a physical issue I've been dealing with that comes and goes. My mind-body just wants it to go away, yet it keeps returning - then vanishing. . . What I've learned is two things: 1. At a physical level, the bodies "fight or flight" gets triggered. Rather than focus on the thought story that I can't make it stop and it will never end - I have been focusing on how my body responds (without the thought story). If I can release the bodies fight-or-flight response, it doesn't both me much and I can let it go and focus on something else. 2. At an existential level, I'm realizing there is a very deep level of freedom available by experiencing what is Now. Again, this then allows for a better chance to let go of the anxiety and discomfort.

[Nahm]

What don’t you want in your life?

What do you want want in your life?

If you don’t want life to be mundane, why do you insist that it is?

 

You’re driving yourself nuts going outward into conceptual false beliefs about yourself & reality...instead of going inward and reconnecting to the loving, beautiful, peaceful, intelligent, permanent self you actually are. Everything you blame for your suffering is the opposite of the truth about yourself. You know it’s not true, because it feels terrible. 

Who treated you this way? Who led you to believe you are not enough?

What was their life situation? Do you see they saw themselves this way, and convinced you to see yourself that way also?

What We’re they afraid of?

Vulnerability?

Independence?

Hard work?

Failure?

Disappointing someone?

What are you so afraid of?

 

 

[mandyjw]

@Shaun You have the gift of feeling things with intensity. Why do the best gifts feel like curses sometimes? Because we don't accept them. We have them but we don't say yes to them. I really feel for you and can really relate to you because much of my journey was and is being really sensitive to things and wanting to shirk from them and hide. 

What Nahm says is so true, when we are not in alignment our feelings let us know, and when we are REALLY not thinking about things the way that God sees things, it REALLY hurts. Therefore your sensitivity means you are spiritually gifted. But you have to use it. You can learn to align with life, love the universe, God, in fact, the gift is that you are so sensitive that you have no other choice but to align with it. 

I really, really , REALLY recommend Abraham Hicks for teaching you how to do so. 

 You got this. 

 

[Nahm]

@mandyjw ♥️