How do I become better at dating?

[Danioover9000]

Hi, I'm danio, and I'm in my 20's. I've got issues in my previous education chapter around boys and a few girls in regards to bullying between middle to high school. Whenever I'm in a social setting and I see women I could approach the fear and insecurity peaks the most. Even the idea of dating triggers this fear. It's sometimes creeps up in social situations unrelated to dating. Any advice on this is appreciated.

[Gili Trawangan]

You have to face that fear head on. It's only fear, realize that no tragedy will occur when you approach a girl. Just do it. And then do it again. And again and again and again. It gets easier

[Danioover9000]

Also, if I happen to come across a woman who has a similar personality to a past female bully I get triggered. Any advice on this too is welcome.

[Danioover9000]

6 minutes ago, Gili Trawangan said:

You have to face that fear head on. It's only fear, realize that no tragedy will occur when you approach a girl. Just do it. And then do it again. And again and again and again. It gets easier

Okey! Thanks for your advice!

[Danioover9000]

13 minutes ago, Gili Trawangan said:

You have to face that fear head on. It's only fear, realize that no tragedy will occur when you approach a girl. Just do it. And then do it again. And again and again and again. It gets easier

Do you mean I should date Often? It's a bit inconvenient at the moment for me to do multiple dates.

[Danioover9000]

Also, any advice on creating a dating profile is welcome. I'm planning to start one soon.

[Gili Trawangan]

No, I mean you should approach often. I thought you wanted to get rid of the fear. That's how you do it. If you want to date girls, date them; and if you don't, don't.

[Danioover9000]

15 minutes ago, Gili Trawangan said:

No, I mean you should approach often. I thought you wanted to get rid of the fear. That's how you do it. If you want to date girls, date them; and if you don't, don't.

Oh, by approach you mean cold approach? And how do I get better at cold approach? Do you have any tips on this? Thanks again!

[Danioover9000]

Also, any tips on socializing is helpful. I plan onaybe dating through social circles.

[Gili Trawangan]

Yes, I mean cold approach

Do 100 approaches with no model, just give them a compliment and try to have a chat. The only goal should be to reduce anxiety and get a feel for it. After 100 approaches, if you feel like you still don't know what you're doing, look up the London Daygame Model, it's the best for cold approach in the daytime, any time anywhere. But I want to stress that you shouldn't do any research before you actually start approaching girls, this is crucial. Go for it!

[Danioover9000]

8 minutes ago, Gili Trawangan said:

Yes, I mean cold approach

Do 100 approaches with no model, just give them a compliment and try to have a chat. The only goal should be to reduce anxiety and get a feel for it. After 100 approaches, if you feel like you still don't know what you're doing, look up the London Daygame Model, it's the best for cold approach in the daytime, any time anywhere. But I want to stress that you shouldn't do any research before you actually start approaching girls, this is crucial. Go for it!

Thanks man! Any advice on how to compliment a woman? Also, do I focus on day game more or night game more? Thanks!

[Danioover9000]

I've just noticed I feel needy around some women despite how fearful I get. Any tips on overcoming neediness I appreciated.

[Gili Trawangan]

4 minutes ago, Danioover9000 said:

Thanks man! Any advice on how to compliment a woman? Also, do I focus on day game more or night game more? Thanks!

Ideally you should give her a heart-felt compliment, what did you like about her? What made you approach? Tell her that, the truth.

Daygame or night game? Up to you, whatever resonates with you the most. I don't like bars and clubs, so for me daygame is the only way to go. But people are different, just do what feels best. 

[Danioover9000]

6 minutes ago, Gili Trawangan said:

Ideally you should give her a heart-felt compliment, what did you like about her? What made you approach? Tell her that, the truth.

Daygame or night game? Up to you, whatever resonates with you the most. I don't like bars and clubs, so for me daygame is the only way to go. But people are different, just do what feels best. 

A heart-warming compliment? That's what I did try in high school, and the female bully turned that into a humiliating experience. Is there a more safer way to compliment? I really don't want my first date to turn into a heart attack session. Thanks for the input!

For me, day game is a bit challenging, but also night game is a bit more inconvenient in my local area. To me, night game sounds like a better option because of the social situation, but I don't mind trying day game. Honestly, the alcohol does help me calm down lol?.

[Danioover9000]

I like to keep my options open. Any advice on using my phone or the internet for dating is much appreciated. Thanks alot!

[Danioover9000]

I just saw a thread about the NoFap movement. Does that help with dating? Any advice and clarification is welcome.

[Danioover9000]

If anyone reading this has experience with dating, mind telling me what that's like? Thanks alot!

[Danioover9000]

1 hour ago, Gili Trawangan said:

Ideally you should give her a heart-felt compliment, what did you like about her? What made you approach? Tell her that, the truth.

Daygame or night game? Up to you, whatever resonates with you the most. I don't like bars and clubs, so for me daygame is the only way to go. But people are different, just do what feels best. 

I'm curious, but what do you value in dating?

[Danioover9000]

I've got a date next week! I already got some places in mind. Do I scout other locations just in case?

[Danioover9000]

If anyone knows how to do text game then I'm interested in hearing some advice on it. Thanks!