The Giving Tree

[mandyjw]

@Truth Addict Capability to cause suffering. 

[Truth Addict]

1 minute ago, mandyjw said:

@Truth Addict Capability to cause suffering. 

Hmmm ?

I thought ignorance was bliss.

[mandyjw]

Just now, Truth Addict said:

Hmmm ?

I thought ignorance was bliss.

Only for a few chosen ones. If you listen to Leo you sure as heck weren't one of them. 

[Truth Addict]

15 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

Only for a few chosen ones. If you listen to Leo you sure as heck weren't one of them. 

Perhaps it goes full-circle. Perhaps it's not black or white.

22 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

@Truth Addict Capability to cause suffering. 

For what I know, there's no causation in the present moment.

[mandyjw]

@Truth Addict I watched this movie over and OVER when I was a kid. 

 

[Truth Addict]

29 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

@Truth Addict I watched this movie over and OVER when I was a kid. 

 

I'll take this cue and leave before Mandy throws her laptop at me.

[mandyjw]

I went for a run, back where I had the exhilarating insight in late march about apples and goddesses of desire. 

I was thinking about the subject of power and running through my head was a pretend conversation "How does the Tao say that woman dominates the man?" I asked. A few steps later a snake appeared, it's head risen and toward the road. I jumped into the road as cars were coming. I was safe but it was embarrassing. 

Later I was torn, should I run to that beautiful point by the island or turn at the nice lady's house and save my energy? A truck was coming and I couldn't turn so I ran to the point. I was reminded of this story that was presented to me at the Doctor Pomroy night . I knew it was an Easter egg, and I had the red marble that I had found just a couple hours before in the river in my pocket. 

"The Legend of Red Island" 

This is the island I had an impulse to run to a month or two ago, when I cut across the rich people's field and across the mud flats to go there.

This story was written by someone who lived right where I accidentally found the hiking trail when my daughter tore up the old family name list in my Grammie's Bible and I had the impulse to google it. The experience I had hiking that trail was almost psychedelic like. Fear overtook me and on impulse I stripped off and dove into the tidal river. 

It's about a maiden, whose head is cut off so her ghost will guard the pirate's treasure. 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited August 31, 2019 by mandyjw

[mandyjw]

As I turned around at the little point that overlooks the island, I laughed inside as I saw across the road an old orchard with apple trees. 

I ran almost home and felt exhausted by the end of the road. I had a strong feeling to follow my desire to stop and walk. I picked a purple flower https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impatiens_glandulifera and immediately had this strong desire prophetic feeling toward this particular abandoned house. I thought about how the entire town is changing and becoming beautiful before my eyes and how it had been reviving slowly in the past ten years. Earlier I noticed an old home someone had fixed and put up for sale, no one ever flips homes here. A week ago, they finally knocked down an old building that was falling into the river with the famous fish on it, my first memory ever of coming through here  as a kid was seeing that fish. At the historical society, a few weeks ago a lady joked about the famous "red" fish. "It's not red! It's faded to orange." 

My intuition high, I kept walking as saw a lottery ticket, but knew I shouldn't touch it. A few feet from it was this. 

Bizarelly enough, it's full, unopened, and is still cold. Why was it thrown out? 

 

[mandyjw]

Come play with me, play with me! The frustrating problem with this journal is it's just PARKED HERE. ROOTED here. 

Like a tree. 

 

[tsuki]

I'M HERE AND I'M GONNA WRITE IN ALL CAPS.

[mandyjw]

@tsuki  

Tsuki, who I am here for? Is this journal mine or yours? 

[tsuki]

THAT SURE BRINGS BACK SOME MEMORIES...

OF MY WIFE BEING PISSED. 

I DO READ THIS JOURNAL EVEN IF I DON'T POST. 

[mandyjw]

@tsuki

I love how passionate women are, capable of being pissed off by a headless tree across the ocean. You should have known me 5 years ago. Manifestation requires powerful emotions. The trick is to learn to channel them properly. 

[tsuki]

@mandyjw

I AM SO PROUD OF HER RIGHT NOW. SHE'S ALL RESPONSIBLE AND CARES ABOUT FINANCES AND CALORIE INTAKE.
SHE'S EVEN MADE STEPS IN CREATING HER OWN BUSINESS. SHE WAS DREAMING OF IT FOR YEARS.

YOU CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE HOW MUCH IT WORK TOOK TO GET HER TO THIS POINT.
THE MOST DIFFICULT THING IN THE WORLD IS TO PUSH YOUR LOVED ONE TO PURSUE HER DREAMS DESPITE HER PROTESTS.

[mandyjw]

You know though Tsuki, she's here for you. 

It's funny how the in the Bible is says that wives should respect their husbands and that husbands should love their wives. I thought that verse was total and utter fuckery. It took me a long time to realize that he was telling women to learn to control their thoughts, and men to open their hearts. It's not quite a pushing action but more of letting go and opening kind of thing.

 

 

Edited August 30, 2019 by mandyjw

[tsuki]

I KNOW SHE IS THERE F O R ME. 

I DESIRE TO BE A SPIRITUAL TEACHER. 

[mandyjw]

@tsuki Reading that makes my heart full, in all caps all the more. There's a kind of love that's patient and blind, it's hidden in plain sight and it won't go to you. All it wants is to be seen and experienced. And when it is it becomes so powerful that it burns up any notions or constructs of power. That kind of love is what makes men afraid of women. Actions arising out of that fear in turn make women afraid of men. They can't hold the space for her, they can't see her light without turning away. Do you really know the goddess that she is? Can you really see it? Our filters of male and female, of dominant and submissive, it's all a trick of the light. What is tree?

[DrewNows]

4 hours ago, mandyjw said:

 

 How’d you like it? 

[mandyjw]

@DrewNows I don't drink. I'll pour it out under an apple tree as a sacrifice offering. 

[DrewNows]

@mandyjw guess it’s not a true sacrifice then