What being a man means ?

[LastThursday]

16 minutes ago, Bill W said:

Same for women. 

Naturally. Anything you can say for a man, you can say for a woman and vice-versa.

But pragmatically most of us live in a gender biased society - males and females are 'programmed' or 'indoctrinated' to fit different moulds from a very young age. Don't underestimate the power of that programming, it's not so easy to escape with just words.

Since the bias is there already, the idea of 'masculinity' and 'femininity' can be generalised into archetypes - which is really what @Shin is referring to. If his post read 'What being the archetype of masculinity means' then that would be closer to his gist. It doesn't mean all men should be like that, just that if you aspire to be archetypically masculine, then follow those rules.

[studentofthegame]

On ‎04‎/‎06‎/‎2019 at 9:08 AM, Shin said:

@ajasatya

I was genuinely interested by your point of view, so let's share in-depth here

 

To me, being a man means knowing exactly what you want out of life and relentlessly aligning yourself to it.
If it means insane suffering so be it, if it means being all alone for years or even decades so be it
If it means in the end, dying for it, so be it.

Totally self-reliant, both psychologically and physically, he does not need any friend or woman in his life, but knows and appreciate the help and beautifulness of those things, and seek to be the best friend and husband possible.
He does not care about other people opinions, he knows what his problems are, what he wants, but also take them into account because he's open minded and truly humble.
He genuinely care about other people emotions, and does not manipulate anyone or anything if it means going against someone else agenda, he prefer to take the risk to no get what he wants if it means taking the freedom of someone else.

Being a man means having no shame of what you are, being totally open about your weaknesses, dreams and emotions
While at the same time being grounded enough not to put any of those as a burden to anyone else but yourself.
He does not fear to say what he thinks, even if it hurts people, while being careful not to hurts people needlessly too.

He's also hyper sexual when he feels like it, with no uncharted water about what he likes to do, and zero holding back in bed, either emotionally and by being as dominant or soft as he wants to be.
He's so open about it that he lets himself go and let his body and mind totally merge with his partner, to the point he does not know what he's going to do or happen.

He has an intense burning to go beyond him, to help mankind in its full possibility and not for petty personal gains
In fact, he does not want anything but giving himself to life, he sees other happiness as his own gains.

He has no shame to express his inner child and to be playful, even if it is to the extent of being seen as feminine
To him his feminine side is as much important as his masculine side and doesn't reject it at all.

Even if he is deeply hurt, either psychologically or physically, he still remains fully open and has the courage to let his heart be open to life.
No matter how much he is getting hurt, he never stops trusting God.

 

I agree with this and it's been energising to read it and remind myself what it's all about

[RichardY]

 

[Surfingthewave]

 @Shin I don't see any difference between your list and a list of what being a woman means. I recommend reading The Descent of Man by Grayson Perry, this will give you valuable insights into what he describes as the "Default White Male" and how society has been constructed by this.

@Emerald  Studying how modern feminism and misogyny co-exist today, particularly in relationships and the world of work is so important when deconstructing masculine and feminine traits. This is needed to needed to break down perceptions, and I'm constantly surprised on this forum. I like how you have done this, sounds like you've been quite a journey yourself. 

 

Edited June 10, 2019 by Surfingthewave

[Malcolm]

On 6/5/2019 at 2:02 PM, Mikael89 said:

I'm going to piss on every single criteria which is named in this thread.

Is this a reasonable, open-minded, considerate perspective to take . . . or express (?)