Mindfulness makes me think more.

[bflare]

Due to some ongoing health concerns & checks that I am having done I am becoming very anxious with all the what 'if's' questions racing through my head. I logically know that this is futile & is not achieving anything. To try & combat this health anxiety I am trying to be mindful throughout the day. For instance when I wake up I try to listen to the birds, I will feel the sun when I walk out side, I will feel the hot water when I am washing the dishes. Anything just to bring me back into the present where everything is just ok. I am finding this difficult to do. It's like when I consciously make the effort to be mindful this conscious thought just makes me think more. It's like a snow ball effect. I realise I am not present which starts a torrent of thinking even if I then try to be mindful. I also have this voice in my head that's telling me that I should be worried. It's like it's pulling me back like a naughty child saying to me 'you have to be worried because if you not then you are tempting fate'. This actually sounds messed up haha.

Any tips please? 

 

[mandyjw]

Self care, distraction, laughter, time with friends. Mindfulness is great but you need some joy in your life. Everyone does. 

Hugs. 

[Farnaby]

Hi!

It's pretty common to experience an increase in self-consciousness when practicing mindfulness. It may be that you're more aware of your thoughts than you were before. 

My tip is to not try to force yourself to be mindful. If your thoughts are very present in your mind, let them be. If you fight them they tend to get more intrusive. 

Another important part IMO is to allow yourself to feel the emotions attached to your health concerns. You have every right to feel scared, angry, sad, etc. Quite often, intrusive and obsessive thoughts are a way in which we feel in control over our emotions. Have you tried surrendering to what you feel and think? This should be done in a setting where you feel safe and have somebody to talk to in case you need it. 

 

[Shin]

Makes you think more

Or

You realize how much thinking you were always doing.

[Nahm]

@bflare

You could not be more deserving of your Love. Practices and mindfulness are wonderful, but they are for the body mind. You, are already perfect. You are what illuminates this person and this world. 

Conditions upon yourself will never feel good. That not feeling good is your evidence, right here & now, of your True nature, an Unconditional Lover of Life, Self, and all things. 

Put down your armor. You’ve carried it long enough. You don’t need it. Never did. Vulnerability is freedom.

[bflare]

55 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

Self care, distraction, laughter, time with friends. Mindfulness is great but you need some joy in your life. Everyone does. 

Hugs. 

Yeah distraction is good! I attend AA twice per week which I really enjoy & I read when I can plus I am trying to gain a better social circle than I had before. I separated from my ex in October 2018 which was a very toxic relationship which I am still trying to heal from.

[bflare]

54 minutes ago, Farnaby said:

Hi!

It's pretty common to experience an increase in self-consciousness when practicing mindfulness. It may be that you're more aware of your thoughts than you were before. 

My tip is to not try to force yourself to be mindful. If your thoughts are very present in your mind, let them be. If you fight them they tend to get more intrusive. 

Another important part IMO is to allow yourself to feel the emotions attached to your health concerns. You have every right to feel scared, angry, sad, etc. Quite often, intrusive and obsessive thoughts are a way in which we feel in control over our emotions. Have you tried surrendering to what you feel and think? This should be done in a setting where you feel safe and have somebody to talk to in case you need it. 

 

Yeah it maybe that I am just more aware. I do meditate once a day but for only 5 minutes. I have found that this has given me periods of no thought randomly throughout the day. When I catch myself thinking I find it almost impossible to just watch the thoughts. I feel attached to them like unable to separate from them. I find this really difficult to be honest.