Feeling depressed after Awakening

[Surfingthewave]

I realise the irony of the above statement, but any tips? The last awakening experience left this feeling of life being meaningless. 

[Inliytened1]

@Surfingthewave its normal.  You might even feel some depression.  It will pass just hang in there.  

[DrewNows]

Who’s the ? that feels depressed? 

[cetus]

@Surfingthewave Your view may have changed but rest assured reality is as it's always been.

[Forestluv]

@Surfingthewave Yea. Awakening isn’t for wimps. ?

[Maya_0]

Completely normal stage on the path. 

 

Check out the book "The end of your world" by Adyashanti. He talks about this stage a lot in that book. 

[abrakamowse]

It's not irony, it's true. It's normal that the "ego" will feel depressed. He is going to die. It's ego backslash.

Just focus on awareness that is permanent, depression is impermanent. It will pass and awareness remains.

[Lister]

1 hour ago, Surfingthewave said:

I realise the irony of the above statement, but any tips? The last awakening experience left this feeling of life being meaningless. 

 

Maybe you're depressed because you don't like your ego and it knows it?

Trying to get rid of the ego and kill the ego is pointless because a) it's never happened in the history of humanity b) it's not necessary because awareness is beyond the ego. Awareness is not the absence of an ego, awareness is what is always aware. Its aware right now of your ever changing contradictory ego. Without awareness you wouldnt even be able to speak of an ego. So awareness is already there, you just have to recognize it. You need an ego, an ego that is appreciated for what it does for you, an integrated ego. There is a difference between liberation and mystical "enlightenment" experiences of "ego death". 

Edited May 8, 2019 by Lister

[Leo Gura]

@Surfingthewave Are you sure it was awakening? What did you become conscious of?

We can't just accept on face value that what happened to you was actually awakening unless you explain it in more detail.

[WelcometoReality]

5 hours ago, Surfingthewave said:

I realise the irony of the above statement, but any tips? The last awakening experience left this feeling of life being meaningless. 

 

Don't wallow in the depression but at the same time don't try to get rid of it.

Explore the story your telling yourself to feel depressed. Is it true?

[Surfingthewave]

Thank you all for your tips and insights. 

@abrakamowse the ego is a complex complex thing which takes a lot of work to break down.

@Leo Gura It was during a meditation practice, I was doing many hour long sits over several days.  Specifically it was during a guided self enquiry (Rupert Spira) meditation, I became fully aware of the "I" as consciousness and experienced what can only be felt as pure, pure bliss. It was such a intensity that I sat like that for a very long time afterwards contemplating, and shed a few tears in the process. But now, two days later, back to normal life I feel quite low. 

[Arnold666]

I know what are you saying bro, once I aweken to the fact that it is only I. Oneness sounded good till for two days I was in the position of the observer, seemed like I didn't moved, never had but everything was going and happening through me and it was only I and just me. Never have been anyone else and the mind of course went to the negative side of it. We are all alone. I'm God without another. Just me. Like in a game playing with bots. The loneliness that arised than almost killed me. I wanted to end it all. But you have to remember that's not full awekening. It's not enlightenment just small glimpses. It will pass. When it will arise the counterpart of it, that is the you are also everything and everybody, the mind will love that oh so badly. But we have to go beyond that too

[Swagala]

Just be aware that this depression is temporary and not only that, it will also lead to greater and better things. Once you become more aware that you will get these depressing thoughts later on and also be aware of it's impermanence when it occurs, these depressions will be nothing but mundane tasks and that they will lead to higher vibrations.

You might not accept right now that these states are temporary or that it will only lead to a better state but reflect on you past depressions and maybe keep this in mind when you're out of the depression and when you get back into them again.

?☺️

Edited May 8, 2019 by Swagala

[Ponder]

Ego Backlash my friend. Happens to the best of us. I've had manic episodes (I'm "diagnosed" bipolar), where I've become enlightened during a manic phase but then reverted back into depression afterwards. I'm fully enlightened now tho and there's no going back. Life is blissful, joyous, peaceful and every other possible virtue you can imagine. Enlightenment is highly underrated by enlightened masters (possibly for good reason), but I prefer to just tell it how it is. Enlightenment is FUCKING AMAZING!

 

[Nahm]

2 hours ago, Surfingthewave said:

normal life

Write about that, unravel it. 

[mandyjw]

@Nahm You mean we should try to sort out the mundane things from the spiritual/amazing ones?  

[Nahm]

@mandyjw Yep

✋?  ?

[noselfnofun]

2 hours ago, Ponder said:

Ego Backlash my friend. Happens to the best of us. I've had manic episodes (I'm "diagnosed" bipolar), where I've become enlightened during a manic phase but then reverted back into depression afterwards. I'm fully enlightened now tho and there's no going back. Life is blissful, joyous, peaceful and every other possible virtue you can imagine. Enlightenment is highly underrated by enlightened masters (possibly for good reason), but I prefer to just tell it how it is. Enlightenment is FUCKING AMAZING!

 

Nice, thats motivating to hear, would you say you are you completely over the fear of death then? Also I remember Shizen Young saying a full enlightened master could endure 3 months of 24/7 torture at a tortuer camp without mentally suffering once. could u do that you reckon, quite a tall order I guess. 

[Zigzag Idiot]

Regarding - Feeling depressed after Awakening

“A man may be born, but in order to be born he must first die, and in order to die he must first awake.” – George Gurdjieff

A memory came up yesterday of a few years ago during a time of existential suffering and dread. I had heard Terrence McKenna use the phrase "Rome falls nine times an hour". To me this perfectly describes the angst, confusion and unsettledness that always seems to return just before a deeper realization occurs. It seems to me that there are many times that one goes through the process of awakening, dying to yet something else and then rebirth.

 

[Hellspeed]

Is normal, because you awakened the limbic system and is atrophied. Now is time for healing and meditation. It is a very tough path to awaken the entire reptilian/limbic parts of the body. Because those parts are interconnected with everything in the universe and the drama is huge, because real awakening is beyond own drama, is experiencing all the drama and bliss of reallity. Being the reason so few people awaken.