Dealing With Stress

[charlie2dogs]

5 hours ago, mystic said:

@charlie2dogs after two months I still cannot make it. I try to do what you suggested but I think that I am failing. I am setting my eyes on the life force within. When I am alone it is easy to do, but when I interact with others, I cannot. I feel like I live completely mechanically. I don't control myself. What else should I do?

the biggest thing  is dont give up, stay with the work, and believe in yourself. now is the hardest time because you think you are not making progress, but you are, and the ego would convince you that you are failing,, see yourself as what you want to become, and keep going, dont look back,  defeat is waiting for you to look back, look deep inside of yourself and find the desire to be free that will sustain you.  it took you a very long time to get where you are, and now you are not happy with it, change doesnt come overnight or sometimes even in a month or two, but those who can stick, win.  stop doubting and just do it.

[mystic]

@charlie2dogs Thank you once again for the reply and the motivation. You are a great person.

[charlie2dogs]

2 hours ago, mystic said:

@charlie2dogs Thank you once again for the reply and the motivation. You are a great person.

no im just like you, i may be older, maybe have traveled further, learned more lessons, paid more consequences,  what i did learn can save you a world of pain and heartache, and consequences.   Its hard for younger people to listen to older people, but we know what the younger are going to have to go through, we have been there and learned the hard way and sometimes paid some very heavy prices to learn.   and if by chance some want to learn the hard way, that is ok too, glad i could help .

[CuteCornDog]

On 4/22/2016 at 1:05 PM, mystic said:

Hello to everybody,

my question for you is how do you deal with moments with high levels of stress. When you have to make a presentation for example.

It has been a huge problem for me for the last years and I still have not found a solution.

Thank you!

Swimming.

Swimming helps me.

Having a pool in your backyard is the best.

[Vaishnavi]

worry simply consumes, and to no means, a lot of physical and mental energy which could be otherwise put to a lot more efficient work. 

Take a 20-30 minute break and go for a walk. Have a chilled glass of water for it helps your Brain relax. Think of your big picture and remind yourself that you have greater things to do than worry about a presentation. 

[mystic]

On 7/10/2016 at 9:32 PM, Vaishnavi said:

worry simply consumes, and to no means, a lot of physical and mental energy which could be otherwise put to a lot more efficient work. 

Take a 20-30 minute break and go for a walk. Have a chilled glass of water for it helps your Brain relax. Think of your big picture and remind yourself that you have greater things to do than worry about a presentation. 

Thank you for your reply @Vaishnavi. I can be relaxed very easily. I have learned how to calm my mind and body very fast. The problem is that I cannot do it under pressure. And a presentation in front of 200-500 people is not just a presentation. It was just an example though..

[Vaishnavi]

@mystic anxiety can at times be good too. Plus being a little nervous under pressure is ok, that's something everyone of us experiences. The only thing you have to make sure is that that pressure of yours should not infect your performance. Anyway it's good to hear that things are better for you. All the best for any of your future presentations  

ps. I know talking about presentation is one way in which you are trying to present the situation  

[Sarah Marie]

@mystic Stress only exsits in your prescriptions. Try to get a new perspective of the situation.

Some awesome questions to answer in an stressful situation is:

Whats the opportunity in this situation?

What buttons are being pushed for me?

 

[Kevin Dunlop]

Hi Mystic,

My advice is different. I have been in these high stress situations and usually they are so unnatural that only a highly trained person could feel comfortable doing them. Dont try to have unreal expectations of yourself, there is no reason that you should be able to do the things you cant do right now. If doing presentations freaks you out, dont do presentations, avoid them, get a job that doesnt need you to do presentations, get someone else to do them. You do what you are already good at not what makes you feel bad. Put yourself into situations you enjoy, where you are the expert not the one who is freaking out. Make a list of situations or jobs, that for you, would be fun, easy enjoyable and seek out these experiences. Believe that there are always lots of options in life just waiting for you. 

   Be careful of other people there are some that might not be good for you in the sensitive state you are in, avoid them, find others you love to be around. I think if you are specific about explaining the problem you have I could help you better. Perhaps you can get advice from someone you trust in your life, a counsellor maybe?

[mystic]

@Kevin Dunlop & @Sarah_Flagg Thank you for your replies! 

The presentations were just an example. The same applies when for every moment that a normal person feels a little bit uncomfortable. I feel uncomfortable when I have to speak in front of many people, when I have to meet my girlfriends parents, when I am in a job interview etc. 

I believe that everybody feels like this in similar situations. The thing for me is that I have always been a cool person. I have never felt stress and anxiety in my life until a day three years ago. 

No I do not want to avoid these situations. I am a great speaker and a very social person. I have to find a solution!  

[Kevin Dunlop]

It seems that you are learning some important things about yourself, I am glad to hear that you have decided to be a great speaker and a more social person like before. Investigating your mind and how it works then undoing things that dont work is a huge help in life. This type of work is emotional and mysterious at times but when you get down to it some of the most interesting and meaningful work to do.

 

[charlie2dogs]

19 hours ago, mystic said:

@Kevin Dunlop & @Sarah_Flagg Thank you for your replies! 

The presentations were just an example. The same applies when for every moment that a normal person feels a little bit uncomfortable. I feel uncomfortable when I have to speak in front of many people, when I have to meet my girlfriends parents, when I am in a job interview etc. 

I believe that everybody feels like this in similar situations. The thing for me is that I have always been a cool person. I have never felt stress and anxiety in my life until a day three years ago. 

No I do not want to avoid these situations. I am a great speaker and a very social person. I have to find a solution!  

you are not secure within yourself, when speaking before many people, where is what you are speaking about coming from,  if you are secure within yourself and you speak with some measure of authority and experience, with passion,  you can talk to the world, meet people, go to interviews with no problem, and if you are only going to function as the human identity, the ego will keep you humble by making you insecure and fearful

[Sarah Marie]

@mystic 

My suggestion is to find a new perspective. Good luck my friend!

[MIARIVEL]

@mystic You know what helps me is having a coach, Im a life coach myself but sometimes having a good coach can get you through anything. My coach knows that when I have a presentation or a motivational talk, I freak out, start to have a panic attack and get anxiety so before I give any talks or am put in a highly stressful situation, I talk to my coach before hand and they are like your motivation, your cheerleader. They give me the strength to face my fears and do it anyway and make me feel like I already gave a great speech. Usually I get over my fear and am always pumped and excited. The more presentations you do and give, the easier it becomes. Everyone goes through that stage of getting over public speaking.

Do you have toastmasters in your area? or you can find groups that practice public speaking in front of each other. A group where everyone is there to get over their fear of public speaking and give good presentations. 

Or before a presentation, just go on your phone - you tube... look up motivational speakers and listen to one before you speak. This should help build your confidence and get you in the right mindset.