First LSD trip - the most profound experience of my life

[Lynnel]

Get ready. This one is HUGE. *YES I'm excited*

Background :

Set & Setting : at home with a tripsitter

Dose : 150 ug of liquid LSD (approx)

The Trip itself

The first thing I noticed the purity and the quality of consciousness you would get on LSD. Mushrooms are way more chaotic and saturated and altough it feels like there is this primal thing which mushrooms well LSD feels more pure like clean white energy compared to mushroom yellow one.

LSD felt to me like a true friend and therapist. It would wait for me to go somewhere and then help me trough it. You have way more control for where you wanna go, it's absolutely not chaotic at all. It's like a surgeon in your spirit.

And you're way more free in how you wanna explore your own mind.

Imagination on LSD feels extremely real and it allows to actually work out  things as if in real life. At least for me. Which is fucking amazing.

But here it goes...the first anecdotal part...skip over it if you don't wanna read about golden dicks for 20 minutes. It's just my ego issues, the absolute love thing is more interesting for some of you ahha.

My golden dick

At some point everything got extremely sexual. Like the LSD got deep into my issues and well the LSD became aphrodite and told me that she would be whatever I would want her to be - because that's what true love meant - she would just be there for me.

She made me realize true acceptance : for whatever reason I wanted a my dick to be sucked by lots of girls, and so I was tripping about having a GOLDEN shining dick which would attract anyone, like being the number one ! I would realize how I would judge myself for my own egoic fantasies and the LSD (aphrodite) would be perfectly fine with it. I would wanna feel special, whatever, every single desire is completely and totaly valid. No questions asked. I went on to imagine having my dick sucked by hundreds of women and asking myself why I would want it. good lord.

Absolute Acceptance...

At some point of the experience I was made to accept anything - I experience a profound state of non resistance - so proufound it was magical. Anything I could think of I would completely accept it. There was NOTHING I could not accept - there was an ABSOLUTE OKAY on everything like in the absolute sense - no resistance - simply a state of ultimate acceptance.

I would on purpose think about things I would find unacceptable and then I would feel myself accepting them. My girlfriend sleeping with another guy ? Sure. This ? sure. That ? Sure. Children dying? Sure.

Every single drop of resistance in my being was dissolved and there was just okayness.

At some point EVERY SINGLE CELL of my being FULLY accepted every single other cell of my being ! FULLY. I was completely okay with myself at this moment and it could not be any other way !

It was freaking absolute ! I have touched only the surfoce of this absolute acceptance but even this drop was enough to dissipate anything.

Nothing could be resisted - resisting was found to be like obsolete. Like You know criticizm is untenable ? resistance is untenable too now.

I touched some form of unconditionnal acceptance. The pure love aphrodite was giving me by simply being there for me and myself in a absolute non judgmental state and dissolving all of my resistance.

And Absolute love.

I was engulfed in absolute love. I understood what unconditionnal and absolute love is. I could just not love EVERYTHING. There is nothing I could not resist and not love - I simply accepted and loved everything.

This love dissolved all my hatred.

I was thinking about every episode of being hurt, betrayed, broken up with, all the pain, all the suffering, everything was forgiven immediately. Hatred no sense. It was purified with absolute love.

Holding grudges was untenable. It was like proposterous. You have to "kill" your ennemies with love. Everything made sense. I felt so much unacceptance from different perspectives such as green vegans, etc. ABSOLUTE love is the answer. It's simply something you wanna share like love dissolves everything.

Every single grudge was dissolved and immediately forgiven. It made no sense to hate. Only love could be felt.

All the rest

Then, I realized that everything which does not happen now is your imagination - only the present moment exists. And I realized how looking at this screen and "living" in the internet was just pure fucking imagination and a simple waste of time.

Guys life is short. Go fucking live it. This forum to some extent does you a great disservice by existing - like mental abstract stuff does nothing for you. Endless discussion do nothing for you. You need to live the work in real fucking life.

You have no idea how amazing your life can get if you do the work. I feel truly blessed for having had actualized in my life and discovering psychedelics. This is such a tremendous paradigm shift and this is just ONE LSD session.

I also finally went from coping to thriving.

I accepted myself so fully in such a full way with this absolute love and acceptance which I realized was something I needed from a women and having live trough that now I would never nourish myself with a women's approval ever - because I've tasted a drop of absolute love and absolute acceptance.

At some point I was telling the LSD to release all the trauma from my nervous system in a fucking concerto and it did with simply such a high awareness and deep acceptance I could feel the cleansing fire of awareness acting on my nervous system. I would end up shaking and almost having a panick attack 3 hours after the comedown with everything that was liberated.

At some point, I had done so much work and dug down deeply into so many different issues and cut them open for integration that I was like well there is nothing else to do now, I've done everything. I have no more problems

I still didn't dig out some deep held beliefs about me and even though this was a extremely profound experience I'll need to see how this integrates in my daily life.

At some point, while I was going into my whole let's fuck thing mode, the dark energy of my psyche materialized in from of me and I started fucking it from behind. And it looked at me like :

- Really ?

Me : Yes. I am fucking you. Deal with it.

(Funniest experience of my life so far)

Truly it's so amazing I don't know where to start : it's like going from a country where you're always fighting for bread to a country where you get some for free and you're still stuck on getting bread. Like a huge paradigm change where I have to be okay with just sharing love and positivity in the world, offering more of myself and my truest expression that just going about solving my own shit.

And this is only the begining of my real journey. It's only one LSD trip. I haven't tried even stronger psychedelics yet.

I also realized I needed a way deeper foundation and there was still a LOT of work to be done in terms of accomplishing things in the real world.

I'd like to thank @Leo Gura because I can now begin to appreciate the depth of the work you've done. And how much there is still to do.

I wish to illustrate how much growth is possible and how much you can do for yourself and the world. I urge you to take your personnal development very seriously and to make your life amazing.

I feel truly blessed having had the opportunity to experience all of this and I wish to encourage everyone to do the best they can to make this world better. I legend was born today. I feel like I can finally blossom.

I went from a "is life even worth living" to a "this is so amazing I can't even believe it".

It took hard work, tears, sweat, intense suffering, but I feel like I've made it to another stage of my life.

Peace & Love <3

Oh and It should be ILLEGAL to make LSD illegal. 

 

[Forestluv]

That is so awesome to read. You are radiating and I can feel it. 

Nice work and thank you for writing a trip report ? ❤️  

[TheAvatarState]

@Lynnel Wow, outstanding report and rebirth!  Man, I almost have tears in my eyes, knowing that another soul has been so moved by this amazing substance, just like I was.

I've found journaling to be extremely helpful in the integration process. It can feel so good to get your thoughts down on paper (or digitally). 

 

"Welcome, Brother. The White Lotus opens wide to those who know her secrets."

[Leo Gura]

@Lynnel Good work!

Still just the tip of the iceberg.

[Adilbek]

I am so happy for you. Let this rub off me too

[Musica]

Now I really feel like doing LSD  

[cetus]

@Lynnel Don't forget to give yourself some credit here too. You set the correct intention.

[daniel695]

i was hesitant to read this, but i read it! pleasant reading this!

 

[Nahm]

@Lynnel ??♥️