Mind Perfectionism / Categoziring

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

Hi everyone, I feel very embarrassed writing about my actual inner problems because they are really absurd and foolish , but in the last time they really took possession over me , so I try to write about it.

I think they concern excessive perfectionism and mind categorization about everything . 

I can not enjoy the simplest things in the last time . I always want all the cake and never a portion. I explain better with examples.

If I read a book about nutrion or nature  (or any possible field) I get irritated because I want to know everything about the subject, I want a degree in it , I want a profession with it . My mind says " you are not a professor of botanic or nutrition  do not read this "  My mind want to maximise everything.

Or a walk in nature watching flowers " you are not a student of botanic so do not watch them"

A philospical discussion " you are not a philosopher you don't study philosophy so do not discuss"  

Listening to music " your life career is not concerned with music so why listen to it " 

Or meditation " you  are not a meditation teacher you can't meditate "

I can not study or read something for my self, I want always everything about it ,I'm not content with a portion . I do a thai chi course but I feel frustrated because I want to a have a super professional school where they teach all about it . 

This mechanism is invading a lot of things , also coocking. 

I do not know what to do . I know it is crazy and stupid 

Sorry for the English 

Edited March 22, 2019 by Giulio Bevilacqua

[Nahm]

@Giulio Bevilacqua

Were one or both of your parents very impatient? 

[mandyjw]

You've already done the most important thing, which is realizing that those thoughts are hindering you. Try to catch the thoughts in the moment when they come up and recognize them as just unhelpful thoughts. The point of meditation is to be imperfect because as thoughts come up your build the muscle to let them go and not identify with them. Purposefully try to do things with the mission of being imperfect at them. Is there an art project you can do, just for the fun of imperfection and to practice it? 

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

9 hours ago, Nahm said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua

Were one or both of your parents very impatient? 

My mother but not very 

[Nahm]

@Giulio Bevilacqua Who would you be if you just half assed everything in your life, but had a ton of fun?

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

A gardener 

[ajasatya]

@Giulio Bevilacqua it happens because you're attached to knowledge. what's the difference between knowledge and wisdom?

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

On 24/3/2019 at 5:09 PM, ajasatya said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua it happens because you're attached to knowledge. what's the difference between knowledge and wisdom?

Yes you are right .  My mind is obsessed with knowledge. 

[Nahm]

On 3/24/2019 at 7:02 AM, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

A gardener 

So why aren’t you being a gardener? 

[Joseph Maynor]

Don't feel bad.  Integrating the Mind and the Heart into the Heart-Mind is a long process.  This is where you descend from the Mind Space into the Heart Space and integrate the Mind and the Heart.  This will solve a lot of your problems of being too locked in the Mind Space.  

Edited April 16, 2019 by Joseph Maynor

[Yellow_Girl]

This is a wonderful gift! You are infinetly curious! Rather than worry about it, allow yourself to explore this crazy reality. 

I know many people who have three or four college degrees. They love learning THAT MUCH.

[Buba]

16 hours ago, Yellow_Girl said:

This is a wonderful gift! You are infinetly curious! Rather than worry about it, allow yourself to explore this crazy reality. 

I know many people who have three or four college degrees. They love learning THAT MUCH.

This is devastating, painful, and never lets a person do anything.