I'm either loosing my mind or becoming awakened...

[Aaron p]

I'm starting to feel extremely depressed with anxiety thrown in there to. Is this a sign of awakening or a real problem. I am consultating my doctor and I'm getting help. But I need some enlightened people to just give their God's honest truth...it feels like I'm tripping without being high, and my emotions are constantly prone to negativity except when I smoke grass...when I smoke it all eases. What you guys think?

[Hellspeed]

You are on the good path. Maybe you feel those parts of the body that you have not used before. So lower back pain or general tightness, not knowing what to do, etc. Maybe is time to let go, relax, meditate until bliss arises. Doctors are not trained beyond reductionism. 

So in other words this is how the unknown feels, depression, desperation. 

Use good foods to heal faster. If you really brave to awaken, you have to conquer the nightmare, and the nightmare is very big, is interconnected with all humanity's subconscious. Those feelings usually, the majority are not yours. 

 

GG

Edited March 13, 2019 by Hellspeed

[Viking]

does it happen out of the blue or as a reaction to specific events in your life?

for how long do you experience it?

what spiritual practices do you do?

[Aaron p]

15 minutes ago, Viking said:

does it happen out of the blue or as a reaction to specific events in your life?

for how long do you experience it?

what spiritual practices do you do?

I do kryia yoga then self enquiry then vepaasana all in about an hour and 15 minutes each day. I feel like I have to stop though, my emotions are going crazy. I'm so scared and I don't know if I can do it been practising for about 7 months

Edited March 13, 2019 by Aaron p

[Aaron p]

13 minutes ago, Hellspeed said:

You are on the good path. Maybe you feel those parts of the body that you have not used before. So lower back pain or general tightness, not knowing what to do, etc. Maybe is time to let go, relax, meditate until bliss arises. Doctors are not trained beyond reductionism. 

So in other words this is how the unknown feels, depression, desperation. 

Use good foods to heal faster. If you really brave to awaken, you have to conquer the nightmare, and the nightmare is very big, is interconnected with all humanity's subconscious. Those feelings usually, the majority are not yours. 

 

GG

@Hellspeed the nightmare has become real and I'm fucking so terrified. Does the nightmare just get worse until you become enlightened? How long does the actual process take? I feel so alone and helpless and verging on telling the doctors that I was suicidal. But I wouldn't kill myself, no point. I'd rather buck loads of wee girls

[Peo]

@Aaron p Dose the truth scare you? Are you depressed of the non-existence or the no self? Did the negativ emotions and the anxiety come the more spiritual work you do? 

[Aaron p]

16 minutes ago, Shiva said:

The path of spiritual awakening is certainly not an easy one, and emotional challenges are to be expected.

But if this is becoming a pattern, you are feeling like you are in a downward spiral or you are continuously feeling worse, maybe it's time to take a break from spirituality. Because even if it is sometimes hard, there's no point if it just makes you feel worse and worse.

Sometimes we need to fix other things first before we can get back on the path.

@Hellspeed This kind of advice is really dangerous. You know nothing about his situation beyond the three sentences from this post, but still give definitive advice. I understand that you may have a lot of experience you want to share, but please be mindful that the advice you're giving here can have real world consequences. 

@Shiva I think I might need to take a break. It feels so terrible. It definitely feels like a downward spiral...but I thought this was to be expected during awakening? It's got pretty bad actually. Starting to feel like my life has no point and I have less and less friends. My dad takes me out for rides in the car he knows all about it I've explained to him. But this is very very tough, I think I need to stop for a few weeks

Edited March 13, 2019 by Aaron p

[cetus]

58 minutes ago, Shiva said:

The path of spiritual awakening is certainly not an easy one, and emotional challenges are to be expected.

But if this is becoming a pattern, you are feeling like you are in a downward spiral or you are continuously feeling worse, maybe it's time to take a break from spirituality. Because even if it is sometimes hard, there's no point if it just makes you feel worse and worse.

Sometimes we need to fix other things first before we can get back on the path.

@Aaron p This is excellent advise in your situation. Give it a break for a while and see how you feel. You can always come back to it later.

[Aaron p]

Ok guys I will. This is like mental shutdown stuff like. Nervous breakdown feeling like

[Salvijus]

Did you try the nadi shudhhi for balancing the mind?

[abrakamowse]

@Aaron p  something similar happened to me in my first epiphany or awakening. I almost go crazy. It is hard for the ego (or for what we think we are) to have those realizations. The ego will fight and very bad against us, to avoid us know our true nature.

And our true nature terrorizes the ego in such a way that if we are so identified with the ego, we will have psicosis, depression, no meaning, etc... What we really are terrorize the ego, because knowing who we are means death for the ego.

In my case, what it helped me the most was mindful meditation. To sit silently and observe my thoughts, until my mind got used to that.

So now, when a negative thought appear, I know that I am not my thoughts and that I am not the thinker of thoughts, so it is easy for me to ignore them.

I feel free after that, there's no psicosis that can affect me, because I am the one who is aware of the psicosis in the mind.

Lol...

 

Hope this helps! 

 

 

Edited March 13, 2019 by abrakamowse

[cetus]

@Aaron p This is great. It's a short video but if you don't have time at least listen to the last couple of mins. to see what I mean. You'll feel a lot lighter about yourself and spirituality.

 

[Highest]

Maybe the dark night of the Soul or the ego resisting with all it’s power. Been there before, it went away eventuallly. Maybe you need a break or just continue, never give up on Truth.

[Hellspeed]

2 hours ago, Shiva said:

The path of spiritual awakening is certainly not an easy one, and emotional challenges are to be expected.

But if this is becoming a pattern, you are feeling like you are in a downward spiral or you are continuously feeling worse, maybe it's time to take a break from spirituality. Because even if it is sometimes hard, there's no point if it just makes you feel worse and worse.

Sometimes we need to fix other things first before we can get back on the path.

@Hellspeed This kind of advice is really dangerous. You know nothing about his situation beyond the three sentences from this post, but still give definitive advice. I understand that you have a lot of experience you want to share, but please be mindful that the advice you're giving here can have real world consequences. 

My padawan, i will call you this, i'm a psychic pal, i can read you and your life story from my desk. So i don't care about what you think about this. 

But by any means, best of wishes. 

[Hellspeed]

@Aaron p Go with the nightmares, use positive visualizations and affirmations. There are only 2 ways on this, go with it or get crushed by it. So careful what you wish for, because awakening maybe 1 in a million reach to see what is what.

Now, don't get into the trap of analyzing any detail. Details are not important. The big picture, The BREATH, the let go, becoming a child again, going with the feelings of despair, they cannot touch you, you cannot be harmed. Stay in realist situation, don't go searching for IT, is already there. 

If you listen to Breath will be fine, any psychotic episode. Is the only thing you can cling too when you will reach a point when you cannot trust nobody, not even the voices in your head. So BREATH is crucial.

 

Best of wishes, msg. me in private for specific techniques and details. 

Edited March 13, 2019 by Hellspeed

[Viking]

I feel like you progressed too much too fast and you're having a major ego backlash. this is what happens when you start doing advanced techniques like self inquiry and kriya yoga without proper balance. 

I would advise to stop with the kriya yoga and the self inquiry. change it to breath awareness or any relaxing meditation of the sort. hang around more frequently with people if you're isolated. it will pass in a few weeks. start the serious practices after a few more years of balance building.

[abrakamowse]

1 minute ago, Hellspeed said:

@Aaron p Go with the nightmares, use positive visualizations and affirmations. There are only 2 ways on this, go with it or get crushed by it. So careful what you wish for, because awakening maybe 1 in a million reach to see what is what.

Now, don't get into the trap of analyzing any detail. Details are not important. The big picture, The BREATH, the let go, becoming a child again, going with the feelings of despair, they cannot touch you, you cannot be harmed. Stay in realist situation, don't go searching for IT, is already there. 

If you listen to Breath will be fine, any psychotic episode. Is the only thing you can cling too when you will reach a point when you cannot trust nobody, not even the voices in your head. So BREATH is crucial.

 

Best of wishes, msg. me in private for specific techniques. 

Great advice...

[Viking]

2 minutes ago, Hellspeed said:

@Aaron p Go with the nightmares, use positive visualizations and affirmations. There are only 2 ways on this, go with it or get crushed by it. So careful what you wish for, because awakening maybe 1 in a million reach to see what is what.

Now, don't get into the trap of analyzing any detail. Details are not important. The big picture, The BREATH, the let go, becoming a child again, going with the feelings of despair, they cannot touch you, you cannot be harmed. Stay in realist situation, don't go searching for IT, is already there. 

If you listen to Breath will be fine, any psychotic episode. Is the only thing you can cling too when you will reach a point when you cannot trust nobody, not even the voices in your head. So BREATH is crucial.

 

Best of wishes, msg. me in private for specific techniques and details. 

I think advice like that won't work because to actually use the advice successfully a lot of previous experience and practice are needed, as well as in depth knowledge and implications of the advice, like a book would give. A few lines in a post will do very little probably.

[Markus]

@Aaron p Hard to tell what the matter is. Could be a purge, could be clinical issues. Feeling like shit by no means predicts awakening.

[Hellspeed]

@Shiva Speak for yourself