ok to self reflect?

[SoonHei]

When working on myself as a person and self reflecting on myself based on recent past... If you think you're a very shitty person, then apart from also ignoring the thought that it's not YOU, is being okay with myself as being a shitty person ok? 

Is that what they call the first step? Admitting or rather just simply seeing that you are what you are and what's done is done. Acknowledging that you're that way but not beating yourself up for it, accepting and then certainly taking to fix that. ?

[FoxFoxFox]

@SoonHei No all this is confused nonsense. The Self is the fact of your existence. The fact that you exist. It has nothing to do with your persona. You are confusing your persona with your real Self. \\

[cetus]

Apply the same theory here as you would with lack and abundance. Don't think in terms of lack (negative). Think in terms of abundance (positive).

You've acknowlaged the negitive already. Now acknowlage the positive and move into it.

 

[Shin]

What is your question ?

[zambize]

I think it's almost necessary to be okay with the shitty person we are.  No one needs the love more than who we are actually are, it does no good to love an image of who we think we are, but it's MUCH harder to love who we are under all of our exaggerations of how good we actually are.    So yes, I absolutely think you are on the right track with acknowledging who you are and just accepting it.  But that also sounds super shitty to me.  I guess a life of fixing my flaws and trying to change myself seems a little more suffocating than thinking of all the positive attributes I could work on embodying.  So while I think you need to accept and love the shittiest parts of yourself, I think Cetus is right that framing this in terms of positive motivation could be a really powerful tool, and the research around that agrees

[Highest]

Accept the negative and darkness in you because that is all part of God=You. You must become conscious of no-Self aka the True Self which is God. Accept yourself fully, everything good and bad. It’s all just God and therefore there is nothing wrong with you. In fact, you are perfect and complete.❤️

[i am I AM]

sometimes, "you" are your own worst enemy

[Preetom]

@SoonHei I'll pose a question to you.

Have you noticed the groundless/hollow nature of objective knowledge yet?

2 hours ago, SoonHei said:

If you think you're a very shitty person, then apart from also ignoring the thought that it's not YOU, is being okay with myself as being a shitty person ok? 

Have a thought experience. Take a scene from your memory where you were this 'shitty person'. Now flip that entire memory and imagine that you were a ''loving person/angel'' in the same scene.

Do you see that both the stories of shitty person and good person are equally groundless and cannot be proven whether it is actually true or not?

This really questions memory itself. How do you know that an evil demon hasn't implanted a bunch of previous program called memory in you?

Edited March 11, 2019 by Preetom

[Forestluv]

@SoonHei In terms of personal development, I think there is a balance. At an immature level, I've seen people say "Well, that's just how I am" in an unhealthy way. For example, an alcoholic causing havoc saying "I'm just a person that drinks to much and hurts others. That's just how I am and I accept that of myself". At a more mature level, we observe the underlying personality dynamics and conditioning. For example consider a person that is passive aggressive. It doesn't do much good to be overly self-critical and constantly beat oneself up. It doesn't do much good to blame one's parents and say "That's just how I am". It doesn't do much good to become defensive. Rather, it does more good to observe the underlying dynamic in a detached way. So we become aware and accept that a psychological dynamic is taking place and we can observe it from a curious, detached perspective. What is the underlying cause of this behavior? How was it conditioned into the mind-body? What triggers this behavior? How does the body feel when this is triggered? What does the attachment look and feel like? What is the self seeking? Relief from insecurity? A desire for control? What are the effects on interpersonal relations when this dynamic appears?

These types of introspective contemplations and meditations can raise one's awareness into what were previously subconscious dynamics occurring. 

[i am I AM]

@Preetom The thing is, you call demon:"evil", meaning we're back at the start again. Calling a thing "outside" evil or "inside" are also, as far as I know, identical concepts as a whole for each. 

That being said, if the thoughts are I don't see any reason you should or shouldn't acknowledge them, as long as it is apparent that it's nothing more than this.

(I don't know).

[Preetom]

@i am I AM

The evil demon was just a way of speaking.

Here I'm questioning the content of any thought.

How can you know if a thought is true or not? Who/what mechanism controls this category?

[tedens]

@SoonHei Yes. This path is about insighting Yourself.

[SoonHei]

@cetus56 hmmm

Sure. Acknowledging the negative however would imply the projection for forthcoming negative domino effect

Like if i forgot to shut the tap and left the home. I am 100km away when i remember this is so... Now i expect my basement to be flooded for example

The basement flooding which will result, that is what is called karma?

I guess turning that to positive... Maybe i needed to redo my floors in basement so it's good? 

 

@zambize thank you. Yes the same thought process...

 

@Highest if only i was at a point to be able to abide from and as that...

@Preetom yeah. That's crazy! the groundless meaning nature of thoughts wow. Indeed.

I guess with that, if i take out the I, no issue is there... It just really means that you have to be just ok with whatever happens

Dropping the I is the case when there is no worry or nobody there to accept or reject the situation... So the moment there is a question of this worry again means the I has been picked back up... 

 

Hmmm kinda talked out loud to myself there

(Well that's always the only case though, isn't it) 

@Serotoninluv

Not using the "this is just what I am" in an unhealthy way... I feel that maybe the case here for me... I have a pattern of thoughts about being and not being the doer of my actions. Which either makes me reason with myself and do something i normally wouldn't do... Saying to myself well. I wont step in to stop. And if that's what's happens, then well that is what was supposed to happen (it is true) but it's this knowledge in the wrong hands (my ego) and it causes this Thought and repeated negative behavior I have been trying to stop... 

[Preetom]

18 minutes ago, SoonHei said:

 

@Preetom yeah. That's crazy! the groundless meaning nature of thoughts wow. Indeed.

I guess with that, if i take out the I, no issue is there... It just really means that you have to be just ok with whatever happens

Dropping the I is the case when there is no worry or nobody there to accept or reject the situation... So the moment there is a question of this worry again means the I has been picked back up... 

 

Hmmm kinda talked out loud to myself there

(Well that's always the only case though, isn't it) 

This line of thinking reminds me where I am at. The process of stomaching the Truth.

Do you see how the 'I' fantasizes about how it is gonna enjoy the cake called enlightenment? But the reality is, there is a beautiful cake; but there is no one to eat it. The mechanism of eating is just absent.

It's so hard to accept the fact that Truth has ZERO concern about what 'I' might want or not. The 'I' loves to conceptualize all the after effects of Enlightenment just like it fantasizes and calculates every situation beforehand.

But too bad that 'I' cannot ever eat that cake. It's like the moth. It can never get the flame, it can only die in it. The greatest tragedy ever?

[cetus]

3 hours ago, SoonHei said:

@cetus56 hmmm

Sure. Acknowledging the negative however would imply the projection for forthcoming negative domino effect

Like if i forgot to shut the tap and left the home. I am 100km away when i remember this is so... Now i expect my basement to be flooded for example

The basement flooding which will result, that is what is called karma?

I guess turning that to positive... Maybe i needed to redo my floors in basement so it's good? 

 

 Exactly!

Paint the floor and walls with waterproof paint and the basement becomes your indoor swimming pool. You could remove the stairs and put a diving board in it's place. How sweet is that?

 

 

[WelcometoReality]

4 hours ago, SoonHei said:

When working on myself as a person and self reflecting on myself based on recent past... If you think you're a very shitty person, then apart from also ignoring the thought that it's not YOU, is being okay with myself as being a shitty person ok? 

Is that what they call the first step? Admitting or rather just simply seeing that you are what you are and what's done is done. Acknowledging that you're that way but not beating yourself up for it, accepting and then certainly taking to fix that. ?

Hmm why bother fixating on the illusion that you are a shitty person? Those are just thoughts from your conditioned mind. Why let them waste your time at all?

When I had these types of thoughts and I saw that they were just thoughts without any basis in reality I did the dishes instead or went out for a walk. 

 

[SoonHei]

1 hour ago, Preetom said:

so hard to accept the fact that Truth has ZERO concern about what 'I' might want or not. The 'I' loves to conceptualize all the after effects of Enlightenment just like it fantasizes and calculates every situation beforehand.

But too bad that 'I' cannot ever eat that cake. It's like the moth. It can never get the flame, it can only die in it. The greatest tragedy ever?

@Preetom ur so very right!

Nobody to eat the cake

Truth is for truth

And to really eat that cake, you must become and surrender to the truth

But this.means.knowing.and.accepting fully the consequences of my actions and yes here again the I speaks

 

To enjoy the cake. I must become nobody... Abide as and become nothing.

@cetus56 public swimming hours from 2-5pm.daily

@WelcometoReality yes brother. Thoughts alone i can handle.. it's rather the karmic consequences of certain actions which were taken that I am worried about

 

Like being tied to a tree and seeing the forrest fire approaching...  the Thought that the fire is coming to be and will likely burn me... Is a thought but it's likely the case and "true"

So here there is nothing but its acceptance and surrender to the truth.

Become noone, truly.

Effortless becoming.

[Telepresent]

23 minutes ago, WelcometoReality said:

Hmm why bother fixating on the illusion that you are a shitty person? Those are just thoughts from your conditioned mind. Why let them waste your time at all?

When I had these types of thoughts and I saw that they were just thoughts without any basis in reality I did the dishes instead or went out for a walk. 

 

Although that is - emotionally speaking - harder for some and easier for others. 

Maybe OP isn't "letting them" waste their time. Maybe it's that they can't just turn it off and do the dishes / go for a walk

[Nahm]

5 hours ago, SoonHei said:

When working on myself as a person and self reflecting on myself based on recent past... If you think you're a very shitty person, then apart from also ignoring the thought that it's not YOU, is being okay with myself as being a shitty person ok? 

Does shitty = ok? 

How does “shitty” feel?  Feels wrong because it’s not true. (Feels....”shitty”)

Is that what they call the first step? Admitting or rather just simply seeing that you are what you are and what's done is done.

Can’t see what you are. Tongue can’t taste itself. 

Acknowledging that you're that way but not beating yourself up for it, accepting and then certainly taking to fix that. ?

“Acknowledging that you’re that way” is just a thought, and the believing of the thought. “Beating yourself up” is compounding more believed thoughts, “accepting yourself” is another believed thought, and “fixing that” is another believed thought. 

If you’ve been eating candy bars, and you want to eat bananas - you can just eat bananas. You don’t need to “resolve” the candy bars, or “fix” anything. You might experience withdrawal from sugar, but you don’t need to “resolve” candy bars & bananas or sugar. You might experience emotions about withdrawal, but you dont need to do anything with the emotions, candy bars, sugar or bananas. You might experience thoughts about emotions, but you don’t need to do anything, about anything. 

 

 

[WelcometoReality]

56 minutes ago, Telepresent said:

Although that is - emotionally speaking - harder for some and easier for others. 

Maybe OP isn't "letting them" waste their time. Maybe it's that they can't just turn it off and do the dishes / go for a walk

Oh it was not easy to let them go. After a good 10 years worth of depression those thoughts were really hard wired in the system. Doing something with the body makes it easier. Dishes/walking/exercise make you connect more to the body and less with the mind.

What I mean with waste of time is feeding into the thought that you are a shitty person because that is acknowledging the thought. Making it believed.