PMS taking a toll on my mental health

[LambChop]

Hello Everyone

A week before my period begins, I grow extremely depressed, anxious, and have sleeping issues. It affects my relationships, eating habits, self esteem, sleep schedule, and school work. Sometimes it gets so bad that I have unwanted thoughts of suicide/homicide. This is not who I am at all and only happens prior and during my period. It scares me and it puts my success and self actualization on a temporary hold.

The reason why I bring this up is because other women cannot seem to relate to this. They claim to only get cramps, cravings, and are easy to anger. It is so much more different for me. My mother had the same thing, so it has to be genetic.

I have heard that I could possibly have PMDD, but that is very rare! Also, my parents don't beleive in therapy, psychology, birth control, or medication for mental health, so I'm kinda lost as to what to do in this situation.

What do I do in the meantime?

[Jamie Universe]

3 hours ago, LambChop said:

The reason why I bring this up is because other women cannot seem to relate to this.

emotions can be genetic, it can also be mental, and you know yourself personally, so ask yourself if mental factors could be a solution, and/or if all this pain is arising from some hidden reason.

 

to give some contrast, I feel similair right now (for a reason I have to yet to find), and I'm a dude. I'm angry a lot more, little things are giving me a crisis, my sleep patterns are also kind of out of whack, and I'm craving distractions, I feel like its because I was out of my meditation habit for a while and I got back on track, but I don't know exactly. 

If you want my advice, don't let this stop your self-actualization, let it cause it. work from where your at, if you can't work, thats your front most problem to deal with.

[MsNobody]

I can totally relate to all you said, someone here recommended the book Period Repair Manual, and it's amazing, so many facts about women's health are left aside and the doctors just recommend us birth control pills, that instead of going to the root of the problems just puts it in standby mode and we are dependent on those drugs our whole life, I like that the author is a naturopath and has been working with women for over 20 years, she really puts together everything we need to know about our period and ovulation, many natural tools that can help us and also a lot of content to understand the role of hormones in our body.

I think when we are pmsing we are more connected with the feminine energy, the darkness and it's a time to go inwards and be with ourselves but nowadays with all the hustling it's very unrealistic plus at least for me those feelings are running the show for two weeks every month and I'm not being able to handle it.

Hope the books brings you some clarity

https://www.amazon.com/Period-Repair-Manual-Treatment-Hormones/dp/1975926773/ref=asc_df_1975926773/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312371602209&hvpos=1o1&hvnetw=g&hvrand=17416473083078774394&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9030939&hvtargid=pla-417335658698&psc=1&tag=&ref=&adgrpid=61011965686&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvadid=312371602209&hvpos=1o1&hvnetw=g&hvrand=17416473083078774394&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9030939&hvtargid=pla-417335658698

[Salvijus]

https://isha.sadhguru.org/us/en/wisdom/article/yogic-relief-pms-mood-swings

 

Edited February 19, 2019 by Salvijus

[Michael569]

There is lots you can do on the physical side that could help. There are some incredibly powerful herbs out there that can help women regulate painful periods, and all PMS symptoms. I wouldn't suggest you go and take OCPs or mental health medication as you may end up worse of eventually. 

If you have some extra money, there are some female herbal tinctures you could look into that naturally help to balance the cycle.  Chest Berry Tree is very powerful but may be better in combination with other. Dr Morse sells a Female Reproductive Formula that is highly rated by women and costs around 25$ pr bottle. Or perhaps chat with a herbalist in your area and see if they could prepare something for you. Good luck !

Also because a lot of the pains are caused by pro-inflammatory by-products of fatty acid metabolism, balancing your intake of Omega 3 vs Omega 6 fatty acids. (1:3 ideally) as well as increasing your fruit and berry intake could help with the pain. + adding some turmeric into your smoothies if you have some occasionally

[Nahm]

On 2/18/2019 at 2:18 PM, LambChop said:

Hello Everyone

A week before my period begins, I grow extremely depressed, anxious, and have sleeping issues. It affects my relationships, eating habits, self esteem, sleep schedule, and school work. Sometimes it gets so bad that I have unwanted thoughts of suicide/homicide. This is not who I am at all and only happens prior and during my period. It scares me and it puts my success and self actualization on a temporary hold.

The reason why I bring this up is because other women cannot seem to relate to this. They claim to only get cramps, cravings, and are easy to anger. It is so much more different for me. My mother had the same thing, so it has to be genetic.

I have heard that I could possibly have PMDD, but that is very rare! Also, my parents don't beleive in therapy, psychology, birth control, or medication for mental health, so I'm kinda lost as to what to do in this situation.

What do I do in the meantime?

I’m offering this in addition to what’s already been offered.

I read your post to my wife, just now, and we talked about it. She used to have really severe pms, it was almost exactly as you described. She tried therapy, pills, etc. In the last couple years, it has become the complete opposite. Nowadays, she is occationally surprized when she ‘starts’ because she didn’t even notice any pms symptoms!  So here’s what she suggests...but please keep in mind, you can not solve any problem while holding onto the same perspective. We experience one perspective at a time, so to realize solutions, that will help, you must let go of what you think you already know. Then there is room for a new perspective. Please really give that consideration. It is not just in reference to actions you are taking or could take as “remedies” - but your entire understanding of your body could be, well, wrong, and that could be the “mysterious” root of the symptoms & suffering. 

 

From your post... let go of the beliefs about genetics, that ain’t it, and unless you’re a geneticist actually resolving the problem in that avenue - that belief will not help you. The all-encompassing factor, is mind - beliefs. They are far more powerful than you know, and they influence the relationship with the body more than you know. 

Notice your parents don’t believe in therapy, psychology, birth control, or medication - but - what do they believe in? If they are in good physical & mental well being - what are they doing, what is their philosophy? What do they suggest to you? Have you tried that?  

If they are not happy, fit, and enjoying mental well being - then they don’t know. That’s fine. Just don’t base what you do for yourself on what they do or don’t do, and don’t adopt their beliefs. 

 

Go to a doctor, and get a complete blood profile. It is quite possible that you are low in something, say iron, hypothetically. Then via menstration, you lose iron, so the major ‘down’ you experience could be rooted in a compounded issue, making it hard to have clarity on what to do about it. It’s very important to see that the thoughts are indicative of the mood & perspective. Don’t believe the thoughts. Their actually trying to protect you, by literally flat out making shit up, in a feeble attempt to make things make sense to you. “Something’s wrong with me” DO NOT believe that, it’s just a thought. 

As I mentioned, therapy & pills did not work for my wife...but...she went to a wholistic dr....and did cupping, reflexology, a lemon cleanse diet, etc, and those things worked tremendously well. Why?

Because her relationship between her mind & body was not understood, and neither was she really aware of the relationship with herself. 

Your body is probably known to you as a physical living cellularly based human being’s body. This is relatively of course true, but it is much much more than just that. Your body is infinite intelligence. It is ‘made out of’ magic, literally. Your brain however, is a limiter of infinite intelligence. When you have those really really low points, this is the root. In not understanding the body relationship, the mind will just continue ‘kickin out’ thoughts which are rooted in making sense of what you’re experiencing. There will be much overthinking about what other people think of you, questioning your own self worth, creating self esteem issues, etc. This root of misunderstanding the relationship with the body sends the mind on a wild goose chase, a real mental mess, which can unfortunately lead towards blaming & shaming yourself.

You’re going about things from the perspective your brain (thoughts) are in charge and running the show, when you should curb thinking and just listen to your body. Much more can come from this than just minimizing the symtoms of pms; intuition, a richer life experience, a healthier body image, a more satisfying sex life, deeper and healthier relationships, not to mention just being perfectly comfortable - just being you. 

 

Can you surrender your current understanding / perspective, which is not serving you, and consider, paradoxically, that the answer to the pms ‘problem’, is actually found in addressing choices when you’re not pmsing? 

If you are eating things to feel better, and then feeling bad about it after and beating up on yourself... if you are overthinking about what other people think of you, and beating up on yourself...if you are measuring your self / life against some “what I’m supposed to do” or “what I should be doing” measuring stick, and beating up on yourself..... - then... there is a lack of mental discipline which is not being addressed. And when period / pms time comes, what would have otherwise been experienced as a few symptoms - instead - drums up the whooooole “beating up on yourself” feeling which you have been carrying, by not addressing. So, pms seems like you’re living through ALL that guilt, shame, frustration, self loathing, etc, etc. 

But what if you were listening to the body? 

What if you cut the sugar, flour, etc? What if you acccepted yourself, easily forgive yourself, love yourself - chronically? 

Then, when you don’t feel so hot from the pms onset - it’d be experienced relatively to feeling really great about the choices you’ve been making, for your well being, and there’d be an appreciation for having taken better and better care of your body, for loving yourself. This alone would minimize the experience of pms - rather than falling so deeply (emotionally) into the abyss of the “pms perspective / mindset”, and painting that color on your whole life, who you are, etc etc. The symptoms would be more of a passing thing, than something identified with, and feeling captive to.

Can you see that there are states? That within experience there are highs, and there are lows...?

Can you see that you know that to be true of your experience?

Can you see then, that you can’t be those states - because - you are the constant, the unchanging thing, which is aware of the changing states?

Deepening the realization of this leads to acceptance of ‘states’, and a knowing and a loving of yourself. Then, pms would not be spilling over into all the other areas of your life; relationships, school, sleep, etc. (Sorry for the pun. Couldn’t resist) 

More.....?

[Charlotte]

@LambChop Can relate, your not alone. 

Best advice I can give is a) Read @Nahm 's reply over and over again and contemplate what he's said. That shit is powerful right there. 

B) look into Agnus castus, that helped me very well. 

C) look into Dr Morses female reproductive tincture. I've just started taking this yesterday but I'm already halfway into my PMS symptoms so I'll have a better understanding next month if it's helped or not. 

Just to reiterate, your not alone sweet ❤️