How do you become an alpha male?

[RichardY]

48 minutes ago, RawJudah said:

I think everyone needs to let go of the labels 'alpha, beta, sigma'

All of this is extremely limiting, with no room for actual growth.

Just be yourself without any labels. 

All this 'alpha' bullshit is like being back in the school playground. 

Time to grow up and let go of the silly immature labels we use to keep ourselves and each other in a box.

Expedient - Gamma.

[RichardY]

20 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Don't worry about being an alpha male. Just work on owning your unique masculine/feminine signature and you will become magnetic.

Masculinity is subtle. It cannot be learned from the outside. It can only be discovered from the inside. 

I think men need to be taught to hunt. Than rely on savagery. But I suppose it depends on the society, or lack there of.

[Hellspeed]

20 hours ago, Arcangelo said:

''Usually is easier for an Aries to be one, but others are not excluded. '' LOL OMG

 

Yes, those born in Spring have a natural tendency. 

[now is forever]

i know that i‘m an alpha girl because some dogs really love me

i think they just smell it.

Edited February 24, 2019 by now is forever

[Emerald]

2 hours ago, RichardY said:

I think men need to be taught to hunt. Than rely on savagery. But I suppose it depends on the society, or lack there of.

There are skills to be learned for any given society. But masculinity and femininity have no form in and of themselves. And the forms and symbols they project forth onto is highly contingent upon the social structure.

For example, in contemporary culture, wearing make-up is almost solely imbued with the feminine in collective consciousness. Make-up itself, however, is both Yin and Yang but neither manly nor womanly inherently. So, if we look at a tribal society, the men may wear war paint as an intensely masculine symbol. So, the collective consciousness of that tribe may imbue the projection of masculine energy onto what is similar in form to what we imbue feminine energy onto.

Think of masculinity as a light with no form of its own. The same is true of femininity. And this formlessness is exactly why it's a subtle energy. Light has no form of its own, and yet it gives solidity to everything we perceive. The same is true of the masculine and feminine.

So, if masculinity is the light, then think of society and collective consciousness as a lens that that light (as a subtle energy) shines into and produces a tangible expression from the otherwise formless masculine.

So, in our society, men don't need to be taught to hunt to hone their masculine energy as it is not a necessity in our society. So, that lens can be used, but it need not be so for a man to own or re-integrate is masculine energy. The masculine is there regardless.

And if a man gets too caught up in socially recognized symbols of masculinity (such as hunting or stoicism), he will become so focused on the form that he will not be able to see the light. And he will write over his natural masculine essence with socially scripted and canned masculine symbols. So, his ideas of masculinity will block his actual masculinity.

It will be form without substance.

But a man who can find his masculinity inside of himself, and own all of himself in his natural masculine/feminine signature, will be incredibly magnetic.

Most men are so busy trying to add masculinity onto themselves from the outside by imbuing themselves with mostly dead cultural symbols to hide their fears and vulnerabilities of somehow being less than.

But a man who truly owns his natural subtle un-pretended masculinity (as well as his Anima) is a treasure to be around, and people will naturally find him magnetic, both romantically and platonically. 

 

[RichardY]

@Emerald Yes I think there is much truth there. Although I query the collective consciousness, instead of collective unconscious(Jungian)?

I have listened to "The secret of the Golden flower" it was a book I heard that Jung had read, was reminded of it by what you have written.

I still think it maybe a good idea to listen or read stoic literature, but not be too serious about it. Perhaps hunt was not the right term, but patriarchal guidance, founded on what I'm not sure, but in a vacuum what else is there.

I find it tough to figure out how best to unify or direct the psyche. Some kind of foundation, with much information out there in the world, I have much to learn and discard.

In many way the feminine seems to be more naturally unified. Alpha, Beta, Omega and so on, do not seem to apply to the female unlike the male. Although I was sceptical of the concepts.

Food for thought perhaps.

[now is forever]

when we talk about alpha in general let’s  think of where the concept stems of originally and what that entails - of course there could be some studies found in ethnology how and what a real alpha entails in a human sense. i suspect alpha is also influenced by kultural phenomena or cultural imprinting. so there might be a difference between a natural alpha and an indoctrinated alpha. if we assume that success alone is an alpha marker i guess we talk about an indoctrination.

so let’s talk about the meaning of alpha in the sense of animal kingdom. the term alpha is mostly found in the research about wolves, because here you find a classical set of alpha male and female - it’s really interesting to watch some documentary about how alpha couples work together to keep their pack alive. you can find wolve packs that contain only of males though, males who left their pack. figuring out what a real alpha is, for me means to understand how these intelligent animals socially work together. and then also to understand - that for humans, we can adopt some of these rules but that there might be other solutions to humans as we are another species. maybe alpha depends more on the knowledge and leading capacities in a special field than on just habitual behavioral properties. so let’s say there are specialized alphas and generalized alphas and we need to decide what kind of alphas we want to be. but ultimateley in this world we need both to work together.

i also think in group leading positions having a female male double head is in many ways a really good combination to set up any balanced system out of an alpha model. so i guess becoming a real alpha male entails the skill of communicating really good with women.

ps: i‘ve never heard of an alpha wolve hunting for another alpha wolve... keep in mind that for alphas hunting is about food, not about their own kind. and they are animals.

Edited February 25, 2019 by now is forever

[Emerald]

33 minutes ago, now is forever said:

when we talk about alpha in general let’s  think of where the concept stems of originally and what that entails - of course there could be some studies found in ethnology how and what a real alpha entails in a human sense. i suspect alpha is also influenced by kultural phenomena or cultural imprinting. so there might be a difference between a natural alpha and an indoctrinated alpha. if we assume that success alone is an alpha marker i guess we talk about an indoctrination.

so let’s talk about the meaning of alpha in the sense of animal kingdom. the term alpha is mostly found in the research about wolves, because here you find a classical set of alpha male and female - it’s really interesting to watch some documentary about how alpha couples work together to keep their pack alive. you can find wolve packs that contain only of males though, males who left their pack. figuring out what a real alpha is, for me means to understand how these intelligent animals socially work together. and then also to understand - that for humans, we can adopt some of these rules but that there might be other solutions to humans as we are another species. maybe alpha depends more on the knowledge and leading capacities in a special field than on just habitual behavioral properties. so let’s say there are specialized alphas and generalized alphas and we need to decide what kind of alphas we want to be. but ultimateley in this world we need both to work together.

i also think in group leading positions having a female male double head is in many ways a really good combination to set up any balanced system out of an alpha model. so i guess becoming a real alpha male entails the skill of communicating really good with women.

Funnily enough, the idea of the Alpha wolf was discovered by a scientist who was breeding wolves in captivity. And he recognized that one wolf would come out as the Alpha. 

But later on, as he researched wolves in the wild who were not in captivity, he found there was no clear Alpha wolf and that his theory was only true with captive wolves. And so the guy who created the theory of Alpha male wolves found later that it was only a behavior that sprung about as a symptom of captivity and the emotional state of the caged wolves. 

You can find this similar kind of thing in prisons, where small packs gather together and there is one clear leader in each group. Human beings do this in captivity as well.

But generally speaking, there are no actual alpha males in the human species that everyone would agree on as alphas. However, there are plenty of masculine men and plenty of inspiring men, and they have great leadership potential.

The idea of alpha is flawed because it automatically sticks men in this competition mindset, where it is a zero sum hierarchical game with one man on top and everyone else as betas. And I notice that men really torture themselves emotionally with this idea, while also holding out hope that they can one day become the alpha. 

So, the idea of the alpha male itself is ironically a kind of psychological captivity that many men impose upon themselves and eachother.

And it really cuts those men off from their actual masculine power source because they're always looking outside themselves to see where they fall in the hierarchy as a way to protect themselves against feelings of low self-worth imposed upon them by the high standards society heaps upon men and boys to have this that or the other quality. 

[now is forever]

@Emerald yes, you are right - what people might think about as alpha couple in a wolves pack is in reality only a male and female wolve who take care of the pack and who take some leads in protection and, hahaha funny as it is, have the sole right to breed... well i guess it’s not really transferable, but still enormous helpful to study their behavior to understand how it could work better (except for the breeding and some other things) because free living wolves are extremely social animals.

Edited February 25, 2019 by now is forever

[Aeris]

be truly yourself

be fully honest

don't fear the loss of a-thing ( an emotion, a need )

feel complete.

be grateful with what you have / do not have

become the best version of your own self

intuitively, believe in the universe to provide what you need 

[Toby]

Funny, having watched that video, I now got recommended this one. Elliot Hulse "there was wisdom in not letting women vote" is as "beta" as it can get:

 

Edited February 27, 2019 by Toby

[Emerald]

9 minutes ago, Toby said:

Funny, having watched that video, I now got recommended this one. Elliot Hulse "there was wisdom in not letting women vote" is as "beta" as it can get:

 

I watched this video a week or so ago. It's really clear that all this alpha talk is often just a cover for deep insecurities and you can sense it is Elliot's need to delineate alpha men from beta men, to ensure himself to be categorized as an alpha. So, this is a perfect example of that.

[Toby]

18 minutes ago, Emerald said:

I watched this video a week or so ago. It's really clear that all this alpha talk is often just a cover for deep insecurities and you can sense it is Elliot's need to delineate alpha men from beta men, to ensure himself to be categorized as an alpha. So, this is a perfect example of that.

That's exactly how I feel about it. He is - imo - a good example for a counterphobic personality. Very insecure trying to put on an act of strength. Easy to spot.

Edited February 27, 2019 by Toby

[Toby]

I once watched something about native americans and it was said something like growing up they watch the children and notice who is a good leader. It is someone who is just a certain kind of personality and others are naturally respecting that boy / girl. That kid later grows into some kind of leader in that tribe. That what I would call "alpha". You cannot just decide to be an "alpha". The group does. Your personality does. If there is no trust / respect for that leader, it's really not a great leader (for that group).