Still haunted by the Halloween episode

[Lynnel]

This is kinda crazy but I'm still literaly haunted by the most recent halloween episode.

Basically, this idea of oneness that I am going to experience every other being experience and it's extremely daunting.

Every freaking time I read about some form of torture, people going blind, suffering, dying, etc. I can't help but get anxious about omg this is gonna happen to me !

And I cannot get out of this. I do understand that it's just a dream but even from a higher perspective you're identified with your ego until your ego discovers you and you realized you're not "it". So the it's not really "you" doesn't help much !

Still I feel like I'm up for an eternity of suffering I can do absolutely nothing about and it's just daunting. Why the hell would I do that to myself ?

I cannot rationalize my way out of it and also I believe it's true just because Leo said it is maybe and I can't see how this could be false (?) Either way I'm stuck with this and it's annoying me because it feels like I need to solve the problem of eternal suffering and it's just ... good lord.

Any tips appreciated.

Edited February 8, 2019 by Lynnel
Typo

[Forestluv]

@Lynnel I've had similar mind-body dynamics. In general, relaxing the mind through various activities help me. Yet for the really deep ones, it's more about surrender and acceptance. For example, surrendering and accepting a mindset of eternal suffering. That's just how it is. It's hard to reach that point, yet the underlying energy often dissipates when I do. When I'm ok with either outcome.

[Lynnel]

@Serotoninluv Thanks !

At least I'm happy I'm not the only one having this problem. I know it's purely something happening in my mind and not in actuality but still it bugs me down a fair bit.

I can't possibly accept a mindset of eternal suffering and possibly horrible lifetimes. I really wished I had avoided that episode x)

[Forestluv]

@Lynnel The worst mindspaces for me is being trapped in "I can't make it stop". When I catch wind of that coming on, my mind tries to avoid that rabbit hole the best it can.

[TheAvatarState]

@Lynnel "You" are not going to experience the worst suffering of mankind. That would be a gross misunderstanding of what the video was trying to get across. The eternal, infinite consciousness you are is not bound by time, it created time to bind, limit, and thus create "you." This "problem" that "you" might be a cancer patient or murderer or rapist in the next life holds no water! Because you'll stop playing "you!" The "you" will be dead. 

This thing of eternal suffering (this is only a concept) is not a problem for the eternal you. Also, you're only seeing one half of the coin. Did you consider eternal bliss and love? "You" will not experience the highest high nor the lowest low... And that's OK. Step outside yourself, and you'll find that this "problem" you think this is is all in your head. It is selective to suite your ego. And it has nothing to do with "you." Reality is Perfect. 

[Maya_0]

Just be present. Stay as what you are. That is enough. When your body dies, you'll have the option of coming back for another life somewhere. Just say no.

Edited February 9, 2019 by Maya_0

[cetus]

@Lynnel A couple of years ago I watched "Apocalypto" and that stayed with me for a while with the human sacrifices. Brutal man brutal.

[Leo Gura]

This is why gurus keep their mouth shut about such things. The ego-mind cannot understand it and only becomes more deluded with fear.

[Key Elements]

23 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

This is why gurus keep their mouth shut about such things. The ego-mind cannot understand it and only becomes more deluded with fear.

That's why self-transcendence goes at the very top of Maslow's. You're "supposed to" talk about it sparingly and tactfully. Only those who are ready to hear it will hear it. I'm planning to structure my LP according to Maslow's--basic needs goes at the bottom and self-transcendence at the top. Teaching a skill is a basic need of survival. Everyone can relate. But, you see, when it comes to very profound stuff, like a relationship based on 'enlightenment' involves complete detachment and non-neediness--no different than being single, most will not be able to relate. So, it's better to focus on gaining a skill. That is more productive than continuously talking about enlightenment when a person can't ever relate to it or understand it. Unless, it happened to him/her already.

[Shin]

Brace yourself buddy, more shit will come

Just remember it's only your imagination that makes it hard,
And eventually you won't become clinically crazy

[Pramit]

Doesn't matter, your memories wont carry over. And suffering is necessary for life anyway , it is the only way this sytem can exist. The problem is that you are afraid of suffering. Remember that the entire reason Budda left his life of luxury is to find the solution to the problem of suffering. Any other problem of life pales in comparison. 

[Space]

On 08/02/2019 at 7:04 PM, Lynnel said:

Every freaking time I read about some form of torture, people going blind, suffering, dying, etc. I can't help but get anxious about omg this is gonna happen to me !

It is all happening to you right now. Every form of torture and suffering that has already occurred was happening to you. But not to your current ego. It's not that you as an ego will experience every form of suffering. 

[Lynnel]

On 08/02/2019 at 10:59 PM, TheAvatarState said:

@Lynnel "You" are not going to experience the worst suffering of mankind. That would be a gross misunderstanding of what the video was trying to get across. The eternal, infinite consciousness you are is not bound by time, it created time to bind, limit, and thus create "you." This "problem" that "you" might be a cancer patient or murderer or rapist in the next life holds no water! Because you'll stop playing "you!" The "you" will be dead. 

This thing of eternal suffering (this is only a concept) is not a problem for the eternal you. Also, you're only seeing one half of the coin. Did you consider eternal bliss and love? "You" will not experience the highest high nor the lowest low... And that's OK. Step outside yourself, and you'll find that this "problem" you think this is is all in your head. It is selective to suite your ego. And it has nothing to do with "you." Reality is Perfect. 

So far in my understanding unless the ego becomes aware enough to see itself trough me (awareness) and thus I am being disidentified by it become more aware I believe I'm actually the ego.

I can't see the practical difference between being the ego which is suffering and being the witnessing awareness behind the ego which is suffering without knowing I'm actually the awareness. Yes of course once the ego dies it doesn't "matter" anymore but still it's like living a bad completely realistic dream for a while.

I can understand why everyone is so focused on becoming enlightened but I can't grasp why the hell would "I" choose to experience a endless realistic sequences of nightmares.

I can grasp on a logical level that it's not gonna happen to me identified as my current self but to the awareness behind it but still it doesn't soothe me enough x)

 

 

 

[TheAvatarState]

1 hour ago, Lynnel said:

I can understand why everyone is so focused on becoming enlightened but I can't grasp why the hell would "I" choose to experience a endless realistic sequences of nightmares.

You're not getting it. There's no choice here. There's no "I." Whether you want to or not, you're going to experience all there is to experience. You already have, so far. But it's not "you" who did it, it's YOU. 

Again, you're seeing one half of the coin. "Endless nightmare" is not true at all. You're projecting your notions of "Bad" and "nightmare" onto it. Your argument is egoic and fear-based, it's narrow, it doesn't hold water. Consider that this thing you're "trying to wrap your head around" is wayyyy beyond that. Way more horrifying, grand, magnificent, and beautiful than you could possibly imagine. 

Leo is right. Consider that you may need to put enlightenment off to the side for now, to focus on more practical personal development. It's clear you're still coming from a rational, practical angle. Nothing wrong with that, but that means you'll have to evolve more until you're ready to tackle enlightenment. 

[Lynnel]

@TheAvatarState So in short the only quote on quote "real" problem is created by my limited understanding of the issue ?

 

[TheAvatarState]

@Lynnel yes, a self-imposed limitation of your ego. You've interpreted this in a negative light, unable to see the flipside. Your ego thinks it has a choice in the matter. You're in your head too much (and trust me, I have this problem a lot too)... The grass is a lot greener in the now 

[Nexeternity]

@Lynnel   A comforting perspective is that maybe your soul has already gone through those lifetimes, has already learned the hard lessons of suffering and now it gets to choose to live a happier life.  

[Shin]

Don't worry, It's like anal sex,

You only think you're gonna explode the first few minutes ?

[SerpaeTetra]

Within infinity, it's possible that God learns from ego's and erases and ends all suffering.  

[Lynnel]

On 10/02/2019 at 3:53 PM, TheAvatarState said:

You're not getting it. There's no choice here. There's no "I." Whether you want to or not, you're going to experience all there is to experience. You already have, so far. But it's not "you" who did it, it's YOU. 

Again, you're seeing one half of the coin. "Endless nightmare" is not true at all. You're projecting your notions of "Bad" and "nightmare" onto it. Your argument is egoic and fear-based, it's narrow, it doesn't hold water. Consider that this thing you're "trying to wrap your head around" is wayyyy beyond that. Way more horrifying, grand, magnificent, and beautiful than you could possibly imagine.

So from the highest/absolute perspective everything is "fine" in the very end (I know the distinction doesn't hold at this level but anyway's) and I can have a direct realization of that ?

Like in short no ego no problem ?

On 10/02/2019 at 3:53 PM, TheAvatarState said:

Leo is right. Consider that you may need to put enlightenment off to the side for now, to focus on more practical personal development. It's clear you're still coming from a rational, practical angle. Nothing wrong with that, but that means you'll have to evolve more until you're ready to tackle enlightenment. 

Oh I'm not focused on enlightenment that's for sure. I'm griding my way to yellow. Enlightenment is a huge fish to fry I'm gonna care about only later it's not for my current level. Only some spirituality here and there.

Thanks you for your help   I appreciate that.

On 10/02/2019 at 5:33 PM, Nexeternity said:

@Lynnel   A comforting perspective is that maybe your soul has already gone through those lifetimes, has already learned the hard lessons of suffering and now it gets to choose to live a happier life.  

Thank you for your words. I always felt like a old soul. Plans for this life time are getting a nobel prize, leaving a nice legacy behind and fucking off to another sweeter dimension  

 

On 10/02/2019 at 10:28 AM, Space said:

It is all happening to you right now. Every form of torture and suffering that has already occurred was happening to you. But not to your current ego. It's not that you as an ego will experience every form of suffering. 

Not to get too wrapped in the issue again but the "you" you're talking about was completely "fine" with this while the ego weren't ?

Like the temporary ego existence will still be suffering which doesn't matter to you in the large scheme of thing but is gonna matter to the ego experiencing it ? I'm not trying to mentally masturbate but just reach a understanding where I can put the issue to rest until I work on enlightenment and solve it in my direct experience.

Thanks