The Dark Night Club

[Bobby]

On 2/6/2019 at 5:55 AM, Preetom said:

The only thing helping me keep my cool is something I've taken as hypothesis.

We all pretty much have layers and layers of constricted emotions and feelings resulted from living and acting as a separate self for decades.

Those who are obsessively identified with the body and forms, these emotions almost never arise so intensely because it would be impossible for them to cope with it and they might pass out in worst case scenarios.

But those who progressively dis-identify from the body, these feelings come up wave after wave to clear up.

I remember the time when I couldn't just feel these heavy emotions no matter how much I wanted. The identification with the body was too strong to allow such uncomfortable feelings. I remember even sleeping for over 15 hours a day just so I didn't have to feel these sensations.

But as I did self-inquiry and progressively disidentified from the body, there is not any heavy defense mechanism present to resist these feelings anymore. So let' see how long these waves last 

That’s exactly how it is for me, hehe.

God is pulling you down and ripping you out of your old skin.

Edited February 8, 2019 by Bobby

[Preetom]

1 hour ago, Bobby said:

That’s exactly how it is for me, hehe.

God is pulling you down and ripping you out of your old skin.

Godspeed.

I try to remember Rupert Spira's advice when feeling heavy emotions.

He says not to have ANY agenda while feeling an emotion. The true test is asking oneself, "Am I okay with living with this feeling for the rest of my life?"

The day we can answer yes to that question honestly, is the day healing starts.

Also he instructs us to feel emotions not as an individual body-mind, but as open empty formless awareness. Just like the space of the room is never distraught by what happens inside the room, awareness never resists whatever emotion is present.

[Bobby]

@Preetom yea you gotta not be dependent on anything to be at peace

sounds damn near impossible, but i'll keep trying until something cracks 

Edited February 9, 2019 by Bobby