Oh boy

[Shin]

A few weeks ago, I had a several days where I had a primal and existential fear every morning and night.
Whenever I opened my eyes, or closed them, my heart was starting to contract.

I was sure I would die if I let it go any further, and I pushed it back every single times.
It really does not feel like a medical condition, it's more like an energetic happening.

Now it's happening again, and I don't think it's going to go back.

It kind of feels like a recurrent unconscious trauma that wants to be seen clearly.
Except it can't be this, I cleaned my karma a while ago.

 

What do you think it could be ? 

[NoSelfSelf]

Ego playing tricks mybe its helping you to see something...how did you clear karma and how you know for sure that you did?

[thesmileyone]

Surrender and let it happen. Know who you are, you cannot die from it if you stay in present Awareness. Let the shadow you out to play.

[Good-boy]

Good boy is getting enlightened. ☠️

[Preetom]

@Shin

1) Sit down with your pen and paper during one of these attacks. Sitting meditation won't do.

2) Set your intent and be super focused to genuinely find out what is it in you, that is actually being harmed or damaged by this panic attack.

3) Do not give up until your genuine intent exhausts itself. Look at every element of your present experience from thoughts, sensations so on and so forth..can you locate the one that is dying? Don't just reason in your head. Actually write down the key points of how your investigation is going on. This will help you a lot to stay focused and not be distracted inside the head.

4) Maybe share your experience with us later

Edited February 5, 2019 by Preetom

[WelcometoReality]

Could it be that you're dealing with a similiar issue as:

 

[Charlotte]

Shin, take the advice you have always given me. 

[Solace]

@Shin

I use what is suggested to help, the OM Mantra, with my own anxiety. The anxiety is very strong when it arises. However, the OM mantra and Ujjayi Breathe are the two practices that always get me back to peace and love!

When Oming (to practice it properly) focus on the vibration created by the sound as it rises from heart to head, while also focusing on the third eye. 

To accurately perform the Ujjayi breathe gently construct the muscles at the base of your throat (close to the front) and breathe through your nostrils. Most importantly, listen to the sound it creates. 

These are very powerful practices that can help you. Stay in silence after both of these practices and feel the peace  Even the strongest emotions are calmed,  and raised to higher vibrations. The loudest thoughts are silenced in the space of consciousness and silence. A lot of the time, I will perform these practices before meditation, which helps in perceiving the energy of love radiating from the heart into the emptiness of my consciousness which an overactive mind and emotions can easily “hide” from our present experience.

Edited February 5, 2019 by Solace

[Shin]

6 hours ago, WelcometoReality said:

Could it be that you're dealing with a similiar issue as:

 

 

Oh boy

 

«I'm going to die, yes, ok
No really I'm going to die, ok
This is the real thing, this is the real thing»

 

 

 

??????

 

 

[Shin]

15 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

Ego playing tricks mybe its helping you to see something...how did you clear karma and how you know for sure that you did?

The fear isn't about not wanting to see something from the unconscious mind, it's deeper than that.

It doesn't feel the same at all.

It's hitting the rock bottom root of fear.

 

[ajasatya]

@Shin when it happens, stand up, open your arms and your chest and then think of a big "YES, THANK YOU".

[Shin]

Just now, ajasatya said:

@Shin when it happens, stand up, open your arms and your chest and then think of a big "YES, THANk

 

 

Why can't I have a peaceful, unexpected awakening like everyone else ???

Or that happens to everyone and you just conveniently never mention it ? ?

Assholes ??

 

I want to do some cardio now, but, well, that's scary ????

 

 

Just now, ajasatya said:

 

[ajasatya]

1 minute ago, Shin said:

Why can't I have a peaceful, unexpected awakening like everyone else

you're joking right? every awakening story that i've ever heard is extemely destructive.

 

[Shin]

Just now, ajasatya said:

you're joking right? every awakening story that i've ever heard is extemely destructive.

 

I'm just searching an excuse, Leo said it from the beginning

There is a difference between thinking you know and the real thing apparently

[NoSelfSelf]

@Shin peacful awakening? Pls there is no such things only really rare cases before you get awakened you will wish to kill yourself and feel like horseshit..dont seek that it will come...

[Shin]

1 minute ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Shin peacful awakening? Pls there is no such things only really rare cases before you get awakened you will wish to kill yourself and feel like horseshit..dont seek that it will come...

[NoSelfSelf]

@Shin There is no bs here we are talking about truth it will hurt you will be tested its no different from anything else just that you cant lie..its like a fight you can talk shit but truth will be out on the day of the fight...

[Mu_]

19 hours ago, Shin said:

A few weeks ago, I had a several days where I had a primal and existential fear every morning and night.
Whenever I opened my eyes, or closed them, my heart was starting to contract.

I was sure I would die if I let it go any further, and I pushed it back every single times.
It really does not feel like a medical condition, it's more like an energetic happening.

Now it's happening again, and I don't think it's going to go back.

It kind of feels like a recurrent unconscious trauma that wants to be seen clearly.
Except it can't be this, I cleaned my karma a while ago.

 

What do you think it could be ? 

Hey Shin,

Clearing karma may have happened in the past, but more stuff can and does come up as one ages.  I don't think one can safely say and know that all has been cleared, I think its best to assume one hasn't and not be closed to the notion that there may still be stuff hidden.  That said, don't go try looking for it, it will find you

In regards to your situation, it may be a energetic shift that is triggering a heart that is still in development.  You have more to learn and grow into my friend, maybe let this in, and softly inquire into what it may be or just throw a open question out to the universe, "what am I to learn from this" and see what happens.

[WelcometoReality]

5 hours ago, Shin said:

 

Oh boy

 

«I'm going to die, yes, ok
No really I'm going to die, ok
This is the real thing, this is the real thing»

 

 

 

??????

 

 

Lucky you! You're going to die.

5 hours ago, Shin said:

The fear isn't about not wanting to see something from the unconscious mind, it's deeper than that.

It doesn't feel the same at all.

It's hitting the rock bottom root of fear.

 

The last stand of the ego. Existential fear of death. 

[outlandish]

We're all assuming this is a psychosomatic thing - which was my first assumption too, but have you considered that this might be a medical issue? It might be worth getting your heart checked out and so on.