Advice for getting ex back

[hikmatshiraliyev]

Hey, guys.

2 weeks ago, i met with a girl. She is my best friend's friend, and i liked her so much. She is a teacher in another city, so she has to live there. It is holiday here, that is why she is in my city. She was planning to go her city for 4-5 days, her family is there. But, she decided to stay here for me. I didn't ask her for that, it was just her choice. She is not that beautiful, but i liked her lifestyle, character vs. In few days, i created attraction, after a week we kissed at my friend's house. Everything was great. 

3 days ago, we went to cafe, talked a lot. Meeting was good. Next day, in morning she texted me casual stuff like how are you? bla bla. After 4-5 messages, she texted:

"I am not sure about my feelings, i like you, but i am not sure.". I felt very bad. I said : "okay, you do not wanna meet with me anymore". She said: "No, i want. But i am just not sure about my feelings". I said "Understood. I don't wanna meet anymore". She: "Okay, understood".

Then she decided to turn back her city for 5 days. Next tuesday she will come back. We do not text each other. What do you think? I want her back, should i do something? 

Sorry for bad english, maybe it is hard to read. I couldn't cover all of the story, if you have questions, i am ready to answer.

[NoSelfSelf]

By not sure about her feelings is that shes not sure if she likes you/dont really like you because of things you did i assume...you said you dont want to meet anymore so...

[hikmatshiraliyev]

@NoSelfSelf man, actually i did it because i thought that it is not a good move to talk about that. if a girl says sth like that it means something went wrong. so, i didn't want to hear "i dont wanna meet you anymore" word

[NoSelfSelf]

@hikmatshiraliyev If she still wants she will again contact you with hey whats up or something and use that to set a meeting...chasing her will just make it worse

[Evilwave Heddy]

1 hour ago, hikmatshiraliyev said:

I said "Understood. I don't wanna meet anymore". She: "Okay, understood".

You cucked yourself.

 

8 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

 If she still wants she will again contact you with hey whats up or something and use that to set a meeting...chasing her will just make it worse

She's not gonna contact him again because he told her he doesnt want to meet anymore.

 

1 hour ago, hikmatshiraliyev said:

if a girl says sth like that it means something went wrong.

No, it means she's undecided about you.  It takes time to develop feelings for people.

 

 

Overall I think you just fucked yourself over on this one.  You also called her your "ex"...but you only kissed once and you were never officially bf/gf.  You have some insecurities you need to work through my friend.

 

 

 

[hikmatshiraliyev]

@Evilwave Heddy i think i have a chance. she lives in my best friend's house, so i plan to go there on tuesday. it is not a problem if she is not going to contact me. I can meet her if i want.

[Evilwave Heddy]

@hikmatshiraliyev You have some explaining to do then.  Good luck

[hikmatshiraliyev]

i thought if a girls says this kinda things, it is almost over. it is a belief in me. you are right, i have to work on my insecurities. 

[Consept]

Yeah you messed up, no one's sure of their feelings at this stage. Furthermore girls will say stuff like this  just to test you reaction, to see if you're easy going or high status or whatever. If you're high status you would just kind of brush off her saying that, almost like she didn't say it, something like 'ok cool, when are we meeting again?'. 

Also it's not really an ex to be honest with you, more like a prospect lol. Anyway good luck getting it back, it's very possible to do so just be cool and laid back about it like it's not a big deal and just have fun with her

[Nexeternity]

@hikmatshiraliyev  If you want to meet up, tell her you want to meet up.  If she doesnt want to then you have to move on.

Really you have to get to a point where you are so happy with life that you dont care too much about getting with any particular girl, and you are just meeting people and sharing time and positive energy with each other until you feel something clicks with some girl in particular and both of you decide to take it further together.  

Be direct and be honest, be vulnerable.  No games.  Remember that you are essentially an abundant being and you will get what you want eventually in its own good time.

Have fun on your journey, let go of those worries  

 

[hikmatshiraliyev]

@Nexeternity I try. My life is not great, i have lots of stuff to handle. But, relationships are great sources of happiness for me, i can not let it go.

[Nexeternity]

@hikmatshiraliyev   No need to let it go.  Definately contact her and ask to meet up.  That is what you want.  Be direct.  If she doesnt want to then you let it go, not really because you let it go, but because it has let go of you hehe.  It forces your hand.