Is it normal to start to feel "trapped" within what you know to be a false projection

[Aaron p]

Particularly this morning and yesterday I've found meditating hard (hopefully that's a good sign). Its quite similar to what I had called "mental illness" in my past. It feels like when I think about where I am or who I am...that there is something that I cannot escape and the harder I try to escape it the further I dig down into it. I feel like this may be a very very good sign, but it's quite hard to deal with. I feel like my last LSD trip really exposed how...there is no world and that all there is is my little bubble. And I also know that my ego mind will hijack this insight and that, that is probably what is torturing me a bit now. 

 

Anyone else experiencing this? Any advice on how to deal with it? I feel super super trapped. Going to work later doesn't help ? 

[corndjorn]

during the early stages of awakening the ego can misinterpret nonduality and use it as an escape or be lazy or whatever subconcious egoic dream u have, due to lack of depth in the nondual experience itself. once awakened to nonduality, your limbic system goes through a process of uncontraction, and this process can be disrorienting because your ego is basically in a triggered-release cycle until all fear mechanisms and the attachments that resist and run away from those fears are completely absent from ur system, once thats happened, you are considered to be fully enlightened. i would say try reflecting on what you are trying to run away from, and then once that fear is exposed, then can clearly see its delusional (because you awoke to nonduality), dont try to escape or do anything though, just recognize the unreality of these fears and attachments. your energetic system will purge it out when its due. I suggest reading or watching sheng yen's videos on youtube, he has helpful videos concerning this process.

[tedens]

Yes its a good sign of procesing.

[Aaron p]

Jesus...right ok

[Aaron p]

@corndjorn @tedens update! I had the most powerful self enquiry/meditation sit I've ever had

...it wasn't explosive but it was strong. Felt very deep

Edited February 2, 2019 by Aaron p

[traveler]

I'm right there with you my friend. I also had a very strong LSD trip, and some LSD flashbacks on weed. I've also had awakening experiences while meditating. I have a hard time observing my thoughts and emotions without attaching or interfering, and they have gotten pretty strong lately. I think it's my ego that has taken the knowledge that i've learned from spiritual teachers on youtube and is using the methods given by them to hide within. It's really hard noticing when this happens, as it from the perceived point of view seems like I'm observing without attaching, but one good rule is to remember that if you're not in a light, joyful or peaceful state then you are not perceiving from the state of the self. The harder I try to observe and meditate the worse it gets, when I'm in a deep meditation suddenly something within me says "stop," and then it seems like I'm transforming into another dimension where there is complete stillness without mind. There is really nothing "you" can do to wake up.