First Solo retreat

[Dorotheus]

I decided to rent a house for a week because i had nothing better to do. The retreat had a duration of 6 days and my goal was to get rid of my addictions and to basicly do nothing at all. I am still quite young so i wasnt alone for the whole 6 days, my parents just didnt wanted to accept that. There was a negotiation process and so they came for three hours to keep me company. But man, this was so fucking more difficult than i could ever imagine, hahaha. The most funny thing i founded was the moment you come there, and you just sit on the couch and realize: another 6 days to go, haha. 

The next 4 days where just a rollercoasterride, it goes something like this: 

"O MAN, I WANT TO GO HOME. WHY AM I EVEN DOING THIS FUCKING BULSHIT LEO GURU IS TELLING ME?! FUCK FUCK, THIS IS DIFFICULT! I CAN CHASE GIRLS AND AM STILL A VIRGIN BUT NO, LETS STARE AT A FUCKING WALL! I AM AFRAID, WAAAAHHH!!!

30 minutes later:

I FEEL SO GOOD, HOW COULD I BE SO DELUDED, HAHAHA. THERE IS ONLY NOW, LIFE IS GOOD. 

And then youre parents come on day 2, and they decided to also take my male man with them. I was like, fuck! Go away!!!! They emediatelly turned on the tv, so the silence was emediatelly gone. What i can vivedly remember was that there was a tennis match on tv. I watched it, and just laughed in myself. I had an insight that all competition is an illusion, they where literally playing with themselves. So winners dont actually exist in reality, hahaha. And after the match you see them having an interview where the winner has this illusery pride, i laughed so hard. And because i was in a state of no-mind, i connected the dots verry quickely. It just made me verry sick and a bit down that captialistic society is based on a GIANT FUCKING lie. Luckilly that went over, because it was a little to much.

After that match not much later i went to the grocery-store with my man, which was quite funny. Do you want a funny experience, go sit in soltitude for 2 days and then go to the grocery-store, haha. It is just so fucking MEANINGLESS.

My man stayed for one night, which was a bit of a distraction, but then the doing nothing continued. The coming 2 days where again up and down, but then just wow. The last 2 days of the retrait where like a heaven, all thoughts just disapeared. I literally sad in complete contentment there, and i needed nothing. The results was that my heared opend, i experienced lights and a pressure between the eyebrows. And so my retreat ended, in absolute happiness. The first 4 days where torture, but i went over hump after that which was awesome. 

My plan for the future is doing more of these solo retreats. What i also want to do is taking a psychedelic, but my parents dont want me to do them. Not so long ago i just flat out said that i want to do one to my dad, he just completely went crazy. There was not even place for an argument, which is a shame because my dad is a verry well educated and sane man. If he knows i ever do that shit, he doesnt want me in his house anymore. So i need to be carefull with that. 

This retrait was a great success, thnx for the recomendation Leo. But..... how the fuck did you do 15 days of this shit, haha. You are a crazy men.

[Leo Gura]

@Dorotheus Great work!

That's what I want to see more of around here, not all the keyboard-jockeying.

[Dorotheus]

Thnx man

[tedens]

Keep going with 'work' for some time and then You'll see whether psychodelics are necessary.

[Nahm]

2 hours ago, Dorotheus said:

30 minutes later

That’s hilarious!

Awesome report man. I’m a fan of the solo rental retreats too. 

[Space]

@Dorotheus Nice! I'm assuming you did a lot of meditation/ self-inquiry? Or did you just kinda sit and do nothing.

[Dorotheus]

What i did was start the day with my yoga, so there are no thoughts then. Because of this, you just sit in consciousness as is. You dont even need to ask questions, you just are. This is my technique. When you do this an automatic healing process revealse itself, witch is so succesful that after a few days of torture, there is no more suffering.

[Charlotte]

@Dorotheus Which practice of yoga?

[Dorotheus]

Kriya