Effects of self-inquiry?

[nistake]

I've been practising self-inquiry (both formal practise and during everyday activities as well) for a while now and I noticed some 'effects' of it on my ego.

Personally, sometimes a weird feeling hits me out of the blue. For example, I'm sitting at my desk at work and a feeling comes up as if it's not even me who's sitting at the desk. It lasts like ~5 seconds and then my ego 'comes back' and I continue doing whatever I was doing. Kinda hard to explain but it is quite a strange feeling.

Also, nowadays I notice a lot of equanimity. I'm not sure if this is a result of the regular meditation or the self-inquiry (or both) but here's just a random example: The other day I was talking to one of my coworker and she was really obnoxious and rude. It even made me angry but after our conversation ended, I asked myself: "Who's angry right now?". I contemplated on this for a few minutes and the usual equanimity returned and I carried on with my work.

So this topic is not about the definition/method/practise/whatever of self-inquiry but I'd rather hear your personal experiences.

[tedens]

When I do the "work" then arise lot of distraction to me. For the worst it is positive side effect: huge increase of creativity. 

You' ve just started "the work", I guess cause this is initial 'effect'.

Edited January 24, 2019 by tedens

[Rilles]

I sometimes get a little jolt of weirdness when Im in a conversation and I hear myself talk...

[tedens]

@Rilles Do the contemplation not conversation.

[Rilles]

4 minutes ago, tedens said:

@Rilles Do the contemplation not conversation.

Im not a hermit, I sometimes have to engage with people. 

[tedens]

If You'll do the 'work' properly in long term, You  can become one.

Edited January 24, 2019 by tedens

[OneWithAll]

@nistake You can lose your ego this instant. You can experience the bliss of Being right now, if you want it. If you don't, that is your ego intervening. Chose. Bliss or illusion?

I would suggest avoiding unconscious entities. Afterall, they are illusions. I would suggest quitting your job, too. Your job is feeding your identity of 'self', which is an illusion, which is keeping you from the bliss of Being.

If you are content with Being, you will experience nothing but bliss.

Cut everything out of your life and just Be. You can do this NOW.

[OneWithAll]

@Rilles Then you are destined to suffer and feel illusionary unhappiness. You do not need unconscious illusions for your own happiness.

[GeoLura]

>So... What am i? Ok, i'm gonna observe thoughts arising.
>"Thoughts....Thoughts....Thinking....Thinking...." Ok so i can't know what my next thought is... they just pop from nowhere...So i can't be the thinker
>Actions and emotions seem to also arise from nowhere, they just happen automatically or with first comes a thought and then comes the action of that thought.
>So....I can't find myself. No-one is in control....
>Every though is illusory it seems. Thinking seems to exist, but the content of thought is illusory. So that must be that only this present moment exist. Only this room exists right now. Everything else must be a fantasy, a delusion.
>OH! oooooh... But something is aware about everything!
>no... wait... It's not something, it's no-thing, it has no qualities.
>So i don't exist... that's very clear, but there's awareness that's left and that has always been AND IT'S EVERYTHING!

At this point everything is the same, everything is consciousness. I went to look around the house and yeap, everything. The next day i went shopping, saw other people and my family, yeap.. they're also consciousness.

Then i realized that believing that anything exists other than consciousness is a belief. I can't know if other people are real, i can't know if anything is real. I don't call it illusion, i just can't know.

And everything is perfect.

[Rilles]

15 minutes ago, OneWithAll said:

@Rilles Then you are destined to suffer and feel illusionary unhappiness. You do not need unconscious illusions for your own happiness.

Because Im not a hermit? Careful with your stories there.

[tedens]

sorry

Edited January 24, 2019 by tedens

[GabeN]

To reach a state of not knowing, and from there to discover what's true!

[tedens]

@GabeN That's not a point of this topic sir. So let's all stick to it, pals. I mean this should be main rule of all topics ,too if You're serious with Your 'work'. Because it cause kinda distraction if You fly with Your minds, 

Edited January 24, 2019 by tedens

[GabeN]

@tedens well that's what self-inquiry did to me so you can also call it an "effect"

[GabeN]

@tedensI see, you still need a bit of theory to fly! don't you think?

[Zigzag Idiot]

Early in my Inquiry, I had no community at all. No friends doing Self observation other than 1 email friend. I would forget my aim for days, weeks, and months at a time. I also experienced a lot of confusion and emotional suffering periodically, as I had all my life. This was during 2003 -2007. Although I experienced Witness Consciousness at times, the pendulum of my emotions for the most part, still ruled the day. During this time, I completely did not get the necessity of sensing the body. I was for the most part trapped inside my head without realizing it. Mired in concepts,,,, During this time I did no sitting meditation. Only 4th way Self observation and tons of reading.

While noticing others blind spots and imagination, I, myself, was also completely infected with uncontrolled imagination, and unaware of it.

To express it bluntly. If you've been doing Inquiry for less than a year, chances are you still don't know jack shit, but you probably think you do. And you might,,,, But the extent of self deception in all of us is a staggering thing to behold in all of its extensiveness and complexity.

 

[tedens]

@Zigzag Idiot  

[tedens]

@GabeN So refine clearly You'r 'effect'.

[OneWithAll]

1 hour ago, Rilles said:

Because Im not a hermit? Careful with your stories there.

While you do not submit to nothingness, you are chasing an illusion. Socialising is an illusion that leads to suffering. Just Be.

[tedens]

@nistake There can be a lot of different side-effects during the 'work' but let's concentrate maybe here on positive?