How to come back from a bad reputation?

[Ross]

I have recently left school where I had a terrible reputation for doing something bad which I won’t mention but it’s left me with bad social anxiety. I am college but I still have this problem. I feel like reputation is the most important thing in life and mine is broken which I feel terrible about, and I still feel like people are spreading rumours about me. Any way to combat this? 

[Michael569]

Trying to win the approval of your schoolmates will be like battling windmills, whatever you do, they will find a way to turn it against you. Not all kids are mean so perhaps try to find a group on your school that will accept you for who you are. You don't need to be friends with everyone. It is those high quality relationship with few individuals that will last you a lifetime. 

Also, kids in college spread rumours about everyone, in the end nobody really gives a shit. People giggle and move on. Most of teenagers are too focused on themselves to really care any deeper about other people's issues. 

There are ways you can counter the humiliation. This may sound counter-intuitive but if you can laugh at yourself along with everybody else, you take away all their power. Doesn't mean becoming a clown but know your weaknesses and be able to find them hillarious. I think this was one of my superpowers as a chubby kid in college, I was always the first one to make fun of my fat ass and everybody else would just giggle without spreading any rumours. 

Whatever you do, keep working on yourself, develop skills, work on your athleticism and your physique, eat well, read a lot and people will naturally start to see that perhaps you are not this silly boy that everybody thought you are. 

[Truth Addict]

People will look at the 'present you', so just be confident and comfortable in your skin, everything else will work itself out for you.

Don't combat. Instead, accept yourself and embrace your mistakes.

Also, don't seek approval, it works so counter-intuitively. Notice that "cool" students don't really care about nothing. And "lame" students are the ones who care.

Of course, doesn't mean that you should become a jerk. Just be detached from others opinions and judgements.

And more importantly, know that you are worthy of love and respect.

Side notes: love others, help whenever possible, speak freely with confidence using your whole body to express yourself, be friendly with strangers, don't take sides, try to be a solution when you can, don't expect anything in return.

[Jamesc]

I think the toxic ones are the ones who will build up and support biases and beliefs from anything other than what is here now and being fully emttited to honesty. The same toxic people have there path along building physical grounds in their reality. So really I think personal ignorance and pretending can be healthy sometimes to learn and accept.

[Shadowraix]

Reputation is beneficial but to have it at the top priority list is setting yourself up for failure and suffering. 

Do some hard inquiry about values and why you feel like you need a good reputation. There is likely something much deeper that you are trying to compensate for.