ivankiss

How to be sane while you're totally insane

12 posts in this topic

This is not a question. This is a "how to" guide.

If it does not fit your reality; it's probably because we are not in the same one.

 

Those who wander off the grid may find useful hints and suggestions here.

 

If you are someone who does not "fit in" exactly and you often find yourself in isolation; you probably feel comfortable spending time with youself. You most likely don't really mind the voice in your head. You're friends with it.

Afterall; everyone else seems to be so boring and repetitive. Copy-pasting what already has been seen, doing what has been done, sticking to the schemes.

Nobody pushes boundaries. Not this far out. Not like you. You are a lone wolf, aren't you?

You never really needed anybody. You only walked your path; all alone.

You may have seen many faces; many roles. You yourself may have been trying on different costumes during your journey. You may have agreed; you may have disagreed. You may have been a part of; you may have been around. But you always carried on; all by yourself.

Observing masks and their roles from a distance, probably made you question your own mask and it's role.

How can yours be real? Everyone else seems to have a fake mask. But yours... yours feels real when it's on. Why is that? Perhaps it is because you carved it out yourself; on your own. You did not follow the herd; did you? You designed your mask with love an care; away from the crowd. Away from their beliefs of what's right and what wrong.

You made your mask fit perfectly.

So good in fact; no one can even tell you have one on. It's transparent. Blended in.

No one can tell... but you.

 

In your darkest hour, the question will arise.

How can you know for sure; you haven't wandered out way too far? How can you know your mask is not fake? How can you know it's real? 

What makes you feel so calm while you're hidden from all eyes? What fills you up? The emptyness has no end. How deep do you wanna dive in? Will you find your way out? Or is there no desire to return at all?

Before you know it; you're stuck in a loop.

You may be best friends with yourself; but you are also your own perfect enemy. Who else can come up with more threatening arguments? Nobody. Only you. It's your insanity fighting against your sanity. 

The duality is within you. Awareness holds it in place. There is nobody more or less insane than you are. 

There is no possible way for you to tell how a sane person looks like. Nor how an insane one does. There is just nothing you can compare them to. For what you know everybody is insane; including you. 

And I mean like big time insane. 

When you die; the joke is on you. That's how insane you are.

So what are you gonna do about it? Are you going to try your best not to stick out too much? Or try to convince everybody you'r the only one who's sane? Will you speak your truth no matter how insane it may sound? Will you not laugh at other's display of insanity? Because it's all you and you're only doing it to yourself?

Well, good luck with that.

You gave your best to transcend all limitations and reach to heaven. Now that you are here; go ahead and baracade yourself again. Build some new limitations. Remain contracted. Remain afraid. At least now you're in heaven.

There is no way to secure yourself. There is no space for a safety net. You cannot hold onto anything if you wanna travel at the speed of light. You must surrender completely.

And you know that.

That is why you are afraid of how that might be. How will it look like and feel like. 

If you completely forget about duality; will you be able to tell a difference between sanity and insanity? Life and death? Fear and love? Pain and pleasure? 

What if you one day realize you're in an insane asylum, not your house? And "your family" is actually the staff working there; taking care of you.

What if non duality is some kind of a modern movement that will cost you your sanity if you go too deep into it? Will you care? Or will there be no one there to care...in the insane asylum?

How comfortable are you with insanity? How far out are you? Will you not forget how to act as a human? Is there no need for that form anymore? 

In my world there is will and it is free.

How it looks and feels does not have to be described. Only survived.

Intelligence is intelligent. Awareness is aware. The hearth is loving. Thus it does not matter how sane or insane I am. The transparency of the mask allows me to adjust. To merge with my environment. Yet I still know I have a mask on. I am playing a role. And I can play an infinite amount of them.

I do not aim to throw the mask in the trash. It is useful. It has it's role. It is how one can relate. One has to be able to relate here. 

Or so it seems.

Insanity may be embraced once fear is no more. The mask is unique and insane looking. It cannot make you insane. Unless you believe you are the mask.

Live fearlessly.

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by ivankiss

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 Why fear not having the mask on when relating to other people? I ask myself that question and I can't seem to understand why. Maybe it's just irrational fear, idk

nice written btw

Edited by tentacion

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The story you made is just like my life but non duality was only cure to this game that made me accept what is...


There is nothing safe with playing it safe.

 

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12 minutes ago, Anton Rogachevski said:

@temptation

The true self is a beautiful gift, revealed only to the worthy ones. You first need to find out if the person in front of you can be trusted, then the mask comes off automatically.

haha yes true

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31 minutes ago, tentacion said:

 Why fear not having the mask on when relating to other people? I ask myself that question and I can't seem to understand why. Maybe it's just irrational fear, idk

nice written btw

If there is a "you" that relates there is a mask. They are the same.

The mask can be very thin. Unnoticrable. Transparent. 

Nevertheless; it's there.

That is if you are still human and still relate to other human beings. 

The fear you described sounds like a trust oriented issue. Or maybe fear of being fully autenthic.

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@ivankiss i made peace with myself that im different that i dont really need anything or anyone to be happy that i could work on myself in peace and dont beat myself up because im not fitting in...or when i do im still indiferent


There is nothing safe with playing it safe.

 

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