Confusion, anxiety about what to do in LIFE

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

Hi everyone. I'm 20 years old 

This periods of my life are really challenging. I'm in a hard state of doubt,insecurity about what i would like to do in my life.

My mind is struggeling between some things. Some time ago i discovered a University about Antropology,Religion and Oriental Civilzation. I would do this uni only for the knowledge that offers, to know the things, to have a cultural package. At the same time i'm a drummer, i have passion for playing different struments. I'm actually signed in a private music school, it's smaller than a real conservatory. 

The problem is : this Antropology university is far away from my city , i have to take 2 trains , it would take 2 hours. A lot of time would be taken away, just sitting in train. So i was worrying that i don't have much time for other things like : nature ,  tai chi course, practicing drums and so on.  I should do good time schedule 

On the other side my feeling is telling me to go directly to the conservatory, even if it feels scary , maybe my ego is afraid of this choice.

I would like to have both at the same time . 

If i do the university i would finish with 23 years and then i could do the conservatory but i'm scared that at 23 y.o is too late to do it. 

Is it worth to do a non practical university only for cultural knowledge ?

The feeling of the uni is colder , and of the conservatory is warmer .

I'm so shattered by all this confusion. I have only 8 months to decide.  I know nobody can really help me , but writing to you is liberating .

Thank you and sorry for my english.

[ajasatya]

@Giulio Bevilacqua imagine how your daily life would feel, from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep. can you visualize yourself facing those challenges and overcoming your difficulties?

personally, i encourage you to pick the hardest choice, if you feel you can go through it.

[ivankiss]

Hello @Giulio Bevilacqua

Take a deep breath. You have planty of time to decide. 8 months is long period. No need for rush.

You might wanna let some air in that mind; create some space. The answear to all your concerns is in there; but you know that already. Just calm down and let the answear come to you.

Ask yourself; "what is the thing that will bring me the highest fulfillment? What will make me wake up each morning bursting with energy and willpower? What is that which will color my life, instead of drain it? What is my deepest passion and intention?"

It sounds like you are on a crossroad.

I know how it feels. Been there a few times myself.

I had to decide between a pretty decant job and my passion...which is music.

I followed the hearth and it worked out for me just fine.

Again. Breathe. You got this.

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

7 minutes ago, ajasatya said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua imagine how your daily life would feel, from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep. can you visualize yourself facing those challenges and overcoming your difficulties?

personally, i encourage you to pick the hardest choice, if you feel you can go through it.

Thank you.

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

@ivankiss Yes, it's challenging